


Hope Will Find Its Way to You

by Moonlessnight126



Category: Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School, Danganronpa, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair, Alternate Universe - Titanic, Bottom Komaeda, Boys In Love, Buried Emotions, Canon Compliant, ENDING not decided, First Crush, First Love, First Time, Komahina – Titanic AU, Lots of kissing, Love Confessions, Love at First Sight, M/M, RMS Titanic, Romance, Top Hinata, love making, sexual tentions, slight mentioning of homophobia, you guys will be deciding their ultimate fate
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2018-01-27
Packaged: 2018-08-18 20:42:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 54,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8175388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonlessnight126/pseuds/Moonlessnight126
Summary: Hinata’s parents paid a lot sum of money to join a luxurious cruise trip held for the families’ elite sons and daughters of the country on board one of the most extravagant ships that has yet to set sail on to the new world. Feeling inadequate due to his family being unremarkable, ordinary and pedestrian, Hinata dreams to escape the dull regimen his parents pose on him and venture out to the world.Amidst his search for his life purpose, he grudgingly boards the ship and his eyes catch a peculiar boy with pale skin complexion, unruly white hair, tall and thin figure. He doesn’t know what draws him to the boy but he can’t lift his eyes from him. He gazes at him from afar; watching the sky as if he’s contemplating about life and so he wonders if that boy is just like him.Unknown to one another, this fateful encounter would later alter the course, their values, and their outlook in the remainder of their lives.





	1. Fateful Encounter

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to NanakiBH and Mihori for beta reading, and also, along with my friend Luisa, for encouraging me to do this! I’m very grateful for your support and I can't thank you enough! <3
> 
> Author’s note: The story includes some elements of the Titanic and Super Danganronpa 2, but it doesn’t necessarily follow the timeline of the Titanic.
> 
> Ending: Not decided yet! Your hope will decide it!
> 
> Their Ages: 17

**Fateful Encounter**

The fresh ocean breeze welcomed the departing ship, venturing the waters on its first sail toward the new world as people waved goodbye to their loved ones.

Hinata’s parents went about to find their suite while Hinata stood there, his eyes solely focused on a peculiar figure leaning with his back against the fence; with pale skin complexion, messy shoulder-length white hair; a rather tall and skinny young man.

He didn’t know what drew him to him but he couldn’t manage to lift his eyes. He gazed at him from afar, watching the sky as if he were contemplating about life, and so he wondered if he was just like him.

His clothes weren’t anything special; just a simple brown suit and a red-and-green sweater vest. Yet, something about him was alluring for some reason. On top of that, for someone to have such white hair at this young age, Hinata couldn’t help but become peculiarly curious as to whether it was something genetic or…?

In that instant, that young man was drawn to look down, and with a spur of pure luck, their eyes lock together.

Hinata fidgeted for a moment for being caught staring, but he couldn’t turn his gaze away and neither did the other boy. They stood there, gazing into one another as the breeze gently stroked their hair.

Hinata swallowed, feeling the strange urge to walk the distance and talk with him. But just after taking one step, he got distracted by a passing couple. He apologized for getting in their way, but when he looked back, he was already gone.

Hinata turned his eyes left and right among the busy crowd but he was nowhere to be found.

‘That was…unusual,’ he thought.

“Hajime, what are you standing there for? Come along now.”

“Yes, father.” Hinata took one last look before he headed after his parents.

* * *

Hinata entered the room and his eyes were drawn to the beautiful furnishings of the suite. Just how much did his parents pay for this?

“Hajime, you’re going to wear your best, finest suit for tonight’s party. You are going to be meeting with the elites so remember to behave properly in front of them.”

Just the mere mentioning of the elite made his throat grow dry and nervousness creep into his veins.

“Understood, mother.”

“Oh, darling, I’m so excited. We will find you a good wife among the elites, and then you will marry and have children. Ah, you will make us proud, son.”

Hinata sighed when she turned away. Feeling already anxious from this trip, he tried to think of the possible good outcomes instead. Who knows? He might strike a lucky encounter with one of the elites or he might find something interesting and worthwhile to entertain his stay aboard the ship.

Hinata’s sigh drew longer that time, fidgeting despite himself and feel discouraged with every passing second. He had always admired the elites and dreamed of attending one of their parties but he knew that he’d never fit in. He felt utterly insecure and wished to be part of something bigger than himself, to become someone he could proud of; in front of his parents, in front of the elites.

Up to that point, he believed he had been leading a boring life as a talentless person.

He looked over at his parents with longing for approval and affection. Their desire to have their son among the elites had always been their dream and he had grown up to think he could be special. But he was a nobody.

An _utterly_ boring existence

Having a hard time to breathe from the stress, to distract himself he decided to leave the room and head outside for some fresh air.

Hinata walked around on deck, his vision capturing the bustling movements of the people, their expensive garments, the wide open blue ocean. The sun shone brightly amidst the clear sky as the wind caressed his face with its gentle touch. He smiled, feeling the stress dissolving as he inhaled fresh air deep into his lungs.

Behind him, he was watched from the corners by a pair of light grey-green eyes.

Hinata turned a corner and was out of sight.

* * *

Hours passed and it was getting close to lunchtime. As Hinata was about to enter the dining hall, he spotted a head of familiar, unusually messy hair among the crowd.

He couldn’t help but turn his head and see what that boy was doing. He saw him sitting on one of the ship benches, holding a book in his hand. Curious, Hinata squinted his eyes further but couldn’t make out the title of the book.

The boy turned one page, his eyes buried in the words; he was caught up in his own world and there was nothing around him but the book in his hand. A smile adorned his face.

One leg on top of the other, calloused fingers holding the book upright; he looked so calm and serene. As the crowd passed him by to the hall, Hinata stood unfazed, staring at him until someone bumped into him.

“Sorry!” Hinata was quick to apologize. He turned his gaze back and his breath got caught in his lungs when he saw those eyes staring back at him. Feeling heat rising to his ears all of the sudden, he walked straight ahead along with the crowd.

Hinata shook his head lightly, calming himself. It was  really embarrassing when he was caught staring, not once but twice! As he sighed, his eyes lifted at the waving of his mother’s hand. He hurried his footsteps and joined his parents at the table.

“Oh look, isn’t that the Kuzuryu family?”

Hinata turned his head to where his mother was referring . Indeed, sitting some tables away, the Kuzuryu family sat along with their children. Fuyuhiko and… _Natsumi_ , was it?

A lot of rumors revolved around the integrity of their line of work. They were supposed to be people of business but some speculated they were actually mafia.

The talented Fuyuhiko was the lead of the family while his sister only served as a backstage persona.

‘I wonder how she feels living under his shadow.’ Hinata wondered.

_…To never come close to the same level of the talented no matter how much one tries…_

It felt really close to home.

Spotting other elites, his nervousness reached a point where his heart was about to burst.

“Excuse me, father… mother.” He stood up with haste.

“What? You haven’t even had your lunch yet. Where are you going?” His father was quick to notice the disturbance on his son’s face.

“I’m not really that hungry. I’ll be taking a stroll around,”  Hinata said with haste as he stepped away from them. His father sighed while his mother frowned.

“Dear, he always does this when the topic of the elites are mentioned. What are we to do with him?” his mother said with concern.

“Give him time. I’m sure he’ll come around.”

They both watched their son as he left the dining hall.

* * *

Hinata swallowed the nervousness that had built up in his stomach and after a while, he felt rather calmer the further he walked away. Hours passed as the day was welcoming the evening sky, turning into a blend of purple and blue hues along with the blotch of red of the blazing setting sun.

It was getting really quiet as people flocked to their rooms, making the atmosphere quite eerie and calming.

“This is _exactly_ what I need.”

He strolled the long path to the end of the ship to watch the sunset and suddenly he halted in his steps when his eyes caught that uncanny white messy hair leaning on the railing, watching the sky.

With no one around, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to go and speak with him. There should have been nothing wrong with making conversation. Yet, he failed to understand why his stomach was flipping so much.

Why did this boy captivate him this much in the first place?

Hinata stood not so far away, watching him. That young man looked so serene; his silent, solemn eyes gazing from the sky to the thundering waters clashing with the propellers in defiance.

With the sun setting and the wind getting stronger, his clothes and hair couldn’t resist the blow of the wind. His gaze remained unwaveringly fixed on the cold depth of the ocean’s waters.

Hinata wondered what kind of thoughts were crossing that young man’s mind then.

* * *

Komaeda’s eyes darkened the further they gazed into the splashing water underneath.

As if the depth of the dark waters were drawing him in.

His luck hadn’t fazed him against the absurd oddities put before him and so he wondered of the possibility of surviving if he pushed himself off deck right that instant.

He recalled the reason he boarded the ship in the first place.

_The Elites._

He wanted to have a glance at the rising hope of the nation with his own eyes, and perhaps to find some kind of meaningful hope for his existence.

Like a calling, he boarded the ship in hopes of finding some change. But his luck had never really followed according to his plans so he wondered what the point of it all was.

Gazing deeply underneath, he contemplated the idea of testing his luck one more time. Would life abandon him and finally let him break away from the cycle of his luck or would he stay to witness what his luck would bring about once more?

Komaeda was so caught up in the maze of thoughts that had veiled his justification of suicide that his body moved instinctively without consideration.

His eyes blurred at the sight of the crashing waves, his mind going numb as sounds around him quieted down to null. He closed his eyes as if falling to sleep when suddenly a grip on his arm broke the illusion and brought him back to the real world. He turned his head to the source of the grip and his eyes landed on the shocked expression of a young man.

The same one who he had caught eyes with before.

Komaeda’s eyes merely blinked at what his luck had brought him. That boy stopped him from falling over. Was that good luck?

* * *

Not sure what was happening, whether that person was sick or attempting something else, Hinata didn’t know how to feel, but he thought of the only safe words he can utter then.

“Hey, are you feeling okay?”

The boy simply smiled and told him there was nothing to worry about, that he merely felt dizzy for a moment, and he thanked him for his kind consideration.

That smile caught Hinata off guard and he couldn’t help but smile back. He released his arm, and, not knowing what else to do, he introduced himself. “I’m Hinata Hajime. You?”

“Komaeda Nagito.”

Hinata started first, “So, what are you doing here? Are you really feeling okay?”

Komaeda simply shrugged. “It was nothing really. Haha, you don’t have to worry about someone like me.”

“Are you sure? It looked like you were going to fall overboard. If you feel sick, we can go see a doctor. ” Hinata persisted. Given Komaeda’s frail figure, he must have been sick. That, or he was really going to...?

His concern was enough to warm Komaeda’s heart even though he wasn’t deserving of it. As Komaeda’s smile grew warmer, he waved his hands in front of himself. “No, really. It’s fine.”

“Well, if you insist.” Hinata hesitated for a moment but he really wanted to take that chance and talk with him. “Do you mind if I stay?”

“Haha, I’m really flattered, but you’ll  be wasting time spending it with a nobody like me.”

“No, I won’t.”

Hinata leaned on the railing next to him to assure him he wouldn’t be going anywhere.

Komaeda leaned next to him and smiled.

Slowly, their small talks turned to conversation. Hinata started to feel comfortable as he shared the space next to him. It was nice to talk to someone of the same age who didn’t intimidate him.

Komaeda’s voice was so serene amidst the sound of the sailing ship and he felt drawn to listen to more. Hinata scooted closer that their elbows barely brushed one another.

They talked about simple matters, from their hobbies to how they usually spent their time.

Komaeda talked about his love for books and how he’d spend his time reading because he was always alone at home. Hinata was keenly interested when Komaeda mentioned his love for mystery books in particular.

“If you’d like, you can come by sometime and I’ll lend you some of the books that I found were interesting,” Komaeda said in a cheerful tone, and Hinata couldn’t help but smile.

“I’d love to.”

He felt drawn to know more about him. Everything about him was unusually… _unique_. And that felt refreshing in its own way.

Looking at Komaeda’s attire, he appeared to be dressed modestly.

“If I may ask,… what brings you aboard?” Hinata asked.

“Luck.”

“What?”

Komaeda gave a laugh at his reaction. “I managed to win a first-class ticket.”

“That’s crazy.” Hinata chuckled.

Komaeda tilted his head to the side toward Hinata, slitting his eyes narrower as his voice dropped deep and low. “I’m _luck_ , after all.”

No matter how absurd that statement sounded, Hinata’s cheeks burned in the cool wind. Not to mention, they were leaning, relatively close, side by side, on the railing.

From that distance, Hinata could clearly make out the details of Komaeda’s face; his light green shade of eyes, his skin - which, although pale, looked so smooth - and, finally, the set of slightly chapped smiling lips.

Hinata was simply fixed in place, unmoving. He couldn’t lift or turn his gaze away and neither did Komaeda as they stared silently for God knows how long.

Hinata dared in his mind to call him handsome despite the paleness of his physique. He looked so refined, almost out of reach despite standing so close to him, almost like an elite.

“There seems to be something on your mind, Hinata-kun. Am I a bother to you?”

Hinata snapped out his trance and shook his head. “No, of course not.”

It was getting late. Komaeda gave one look towards Hinata before saying, “I have to leave now, Hinata-kun. It was really nice talking to you. We’ll surely meet again.”

Hinata blinked at how time had passed so quickly. He knew that he should leave to start getting ready for the party. “Yeah, see you around, Komaeda.” Hinata smiled as he watched Komaeda’s figure walk away.

It was strange. He wanted to spend more time with that peculiar and uncanny young man.

* * *

A few hours passed into the night as the light shone brightly in the lobby leading to an extravagant room; a party held precisely for the talented among the elite families.

The room was bustling with music and people chattering. Lights illuminated brightly against the beautifully decorated ornaments filling every corner. People dressed in extravagant suits and dresses, showing their statuses and wealth.

Everyone attended, from those who were professionals in mechanics, to chefs, musicians, and traditional dancers. Hinata found himself an outcast among those talented people. No one else was allowed to attend the party but Hinata’s parents paid a large sum of money to be the only exception.

He felt ashamed and embarrassed when his parents tried to make him mingle with the other kids.

And here he was, stuck with a girl named Saionji, feeling quite uncomfortable. Partly because of her talking about her strange hobbies like squishing ants.

‘Are all of them bizarre like this?’ he silently thought.

They truly felt very _unordinary_ in every aspect.

Hinata was dreading his presence, dreading his lack of talent, and feeling very self-conscious among those families, but he couldn’t leave. He would’ve rather been somewhere else, perhaps with Komaeda. Definitely Komaeda. Somehow, he felt he could relate to him more than any of the people present in the room.

Families walked in, one after the other, and Hinata’s heart nearly stopped when one certain person walked right into the room in an extravagantly luxurious suit. Hinata’s eyes widened in shock while his breath got caught in his throat.  Struck with awe, he couldn’t remove his eyes from him.

_‘Komaeda?!’_

Komaeda looked over the crowd and the moment he laid eyes on Hinata, his ever-exquisite smile flashed brightly and Hinata’s heart couldn’t beat in his chest any louder.

Hinata slipped away from his parents while they were talking with others, making his way to him.

Komaeda greeted him with, “What a surprise, Hinata-kun.”

A surprise indeed.

“K-Komaeda?” He hated how his voice stuttered for a moment there. He was genuinely surprised with Komaeda’s presence since he speculated that he wasn’t even among the elite on this ship. “What are you doing here?”

“To attend the ball naturally. To witness all of these talented people with my own eyes is truly a marvelous occasion.”

The realization dawned belatedly to him. “You…you’re one of the elite?” This statement was more to himself than Komaeda.

Komaeda tilted his head to the side and looked at Hinata with a curious gleam while a smile painted itself on his lips. “Why, of course Hinata-kun. I’m the ultimate luck after all. But it’s not surprising that you might have forgotten our conversation already. I must have bored you after all.” Komaeda’s smile fell short at the realization.

“ _No_ , I mean… luck is a talent?”

Komaeda chuckled, “It’s not really an important one. Among all the elites here, I’m merely but a second-rate to all these lovely talents. My talent isn’t really anything special but it still captivates this program’s interest for some reason. They have invited me several times before and I declined their offer. But after winning a ticket here, I felt there was a calling so I came. Funny, isn’t it?”

Hinata looked at him with a nervous smile that melted to an upset one. So Komaeda was an elite after all?

The truth of that fact alone must have made nervousness and insecurity creep into Hinata’s veins but for him to have felt that comfort around Komaeda before made him question why was he perplexed to stay.

Especially when any moment Komaeda would-

“This is truly wonderful, Hinata-kun. I had memorized all the elite’s family names so I can’t believe how I could have possibly slipped your family’s name. Your talent must be special!”

Just when Hinata was about to explain himself, Komaeda exclaimed excitedly when he saw the son chef, Teruteru, whose family owns many chains of restaurants around the world; or the famous Souda family who were behind the ship’s mechanical build thanks to their son Kazuichi, who was standing fairly close to princess Sonia Nevermind; who belongs to one of the wealthiest families among the members of the ship.

Truly a sight to behold. Hope was just brimming from each other those individuals, Komaeda excalimed.

Hinata was surprised Komaeda memorized everyone’s names and talents which showed his deep admiration for these elites. He fisted his hand as he stood there feeling completely and downright ordinary in comparison to these people, even to Komaeda himself whose talent was still so bewildering to him. He felt like an utter fool.

“Hinata-kun? You look pale. Are you feeling okay?”

“Y-yeah, I just… need some fresh air.”

Komaeda smiled, “If you don’t mind someone like me then I’ll join you.”

Hinata gave him a weak smile as they headed outside of the room.

Their parents noticed him walking out with another boy and smiled because Hinata was starting to blend well with the others.

* * *

Walking to the balcony, they gazed at the brilliant clear sky, listening to the bustling voices of people surrounding the surface of the ship. Hinata felt calm wash over him as he breathed in the fresh air.

Smiling and leaning close stood Komaeda and Hinata still couldn’t comprehend as to why he found the boy to look absolutely outstanding in this suit. Somehow, it pulled the feeling of grandeur along with the mysterious and unnerving aura surrounding the boy.

“You were surprised to see me today. Was I a sight to behold?”

Hinata blushed red for appearing so readable and obvious to the observant light grey-green eyes but his next words toppled him over.

“Obviously, I must look disturbing to look at.  It’s understandable really…-a piece of garbage like me. I know I shouldn’t be here.”

“What?! No! ...I-it’s…quite the opposite.”

Hinata took a breath to relieve his awkward embarrassment. “I just…wasn’t expecting you to be an elite when we met. You just surprised me, is all.”

“I see.”

“A-are you really serious? I mean, your talent really _is_ …?” Hinata really hated himself for stammering over the words but he was genuinely embarrassed and in shock.

Komaeda hummed.

Hinata’s eyes glazed with curiosity and awe at having something as rare and beautiful as luck.

Komaeda was able to sense that and chuckled, “My talent is undeserving of praise. Among the great talents boarding the ship, mine shouldn’t even be given the right to compare. It’s not worth anything special, really.” He cast his eyes aside. “I experience all kinds of luck, so it’s been nothing but trouble for me. You see, when I was younger, I was involved in a tragic accident that took my parents from me. I inherited their great wealth, but… Would you call that good luck? Well, it must be, right? I have my freedom now.

Although Hinata was astounded by the fact that Komaeda wasn’t fazed by talking about such tragic incidents, he could tell that his smile was harboring other emotions as well. It was hard to tell because Komaeda seemed to smile at both the good and the bad.

Hinata couldn't help but feel sympathy for the boy.

He wondered how much Komaeda had suffered. How did he manage to handle them? Was that the reason for his ever-unchanging smile? Was that his way of coping with the tragedies that struck his life early on?

It was really admirable that he could smile like that in the face of those misfortunes. He truly was an elite.

His inner admiration made Hinata want to get closer to him.

Komaeda took one look at Hinata and leaned closer with a smile. “You don’t have to look like that, Hinata-kun.” Next, however, was a question that put Hinata into a heart-gripping position. “What might your wonderful talent may be, Hinata-kun? I’m sure it’s much greater than this worthless talent of mine.”

Hinata looked down pitifully and Komaeda got the hint that Hinata wasn’t really comfortable, and his smile drew wider. “Is your talent so great that you feel too humble to share it with me?”

Hinata stuttered, “K-Komaeda…I…”

His heart gripped tighter, fearing that the boy, who so openly expressed his admiration for the talented, would look upon him with distaste after learning the fact that he was merely ordinary. A _nobody_.

A feeling of hollowness filled him because the thought of Komaeda turning away in repulsion felt like being swallowed into a black hole, falling far away and making Komaeda out of reach.

Somehow, he wanted Komaeda to look at him with those heartwarming eyes and that smile that captivated him so much.

But how much would it cost him to hide the truth? Moreover, he didn’t know why losing Komaeda’s bright smile made him feel such a strange and upsetting feeling inside.

“It’s okay if you don’t feel comfortable about it. I understand. But if I might guess, maybe it’s kindness?”

Hinata blinked. That couldn’t be a talent, but he blushed when Komaeda knowingly looked at him. Was it because he had saved him from falling over earlier that day?

“That wasn’t kindness. It was just the normal thing to do.”

“Then maybe you have been looking quite observantly at me for some time to have noticed that.”

Was he referring to how he had caught him staring before, too?

“I-I wasn’t!”

There he went again with that hearty laugh of his. It made Hinata’s heart pound in so many strange ways.

“I’m just joking with you, Hinata-kun. There’s no way someone like me would receive such attention. I’m just garbage, after all.”

“Why do you keep saying that? I don’t see you like that at all. In fact, I admire you.” That last part was blurted out before Hinata could stop himself.

The look of disbelief that Komaeda gave him pulled more shades of red on Hinata’s face. His blush could have been reaching his ears because of how hot he felt.

“I-I mean… I find you different in a way that’s uncommon. Being with you makes me feel exempt from everything I’ve ever known. It makes me feel lucky to have met you, Komaeda.” Hinata flashed his own shy smile.

_‘I want to get to know you more, to understand you. I want to get closer to you.’_

Komaeda’s mouth gaped for that brief moment as the breath got halted in his lungs. A smile followed and Hinata got the feeling that Komaeda felt touched.

He probably didn’t believe he was worthy of such words but for a moment he allowed himself to savor it.

“Meeting you... I must truly be lucky, Hinata-kun,” Komaeda said.

Keeping his eyes locked with Hinata’s, those lips warmly smiled at his presence as the wind playfully gusted through his hair.

Hinata found himself dazzled, as if he were hypnotized by his gaze. A feeling unknown to him spread through his heart like a wildfire. He felt he could dive into the vast wonder of Komaeda’s world through his eyes.

They spent the rest of the party talking and Hinata felt they got along quite well that night.

Although, like the others, Komaeda’s presence should have given him that same discomfort and shown him the vast gap between an _ordinary person_ and an _elite,_ but, with him, it was quite different.

And Komaeda felt at ease with Hinata. Like he could be himself around him.

Both couldn’t be more drawn to each other in admiration and interest.

They felt quite similar and thus felt they could relate to each other.

_They both wanted change, a new meaning to life, a hopeful future._

Not only meeting once but twice in one day.

That must have been fate.

They both felt lucky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Kindly leave a comment and you're free to massage me anytime! <3
> 
> Check Tumblr under the tags "my edit" or "my fic" to see my Komahina edits, and my Youtube for Komahina AMVs.  
> Tumblr: http://moonlessnight126.tumblr.com/  
> Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/moonlessnight126


	2. Foreign Feelings

**Foreign Feelings**

Hinata woke up that morning feeling rather relaxed than the day before. As he spent his morning having breakfast with his parents, his eyes eagerly searched for a certain white-haired boy among the sea of people. It was strange how he was looking forward to meeting him again, but he couldn't find him anywhere.

Dejectedly, he finished the rest of his breakfast and bid his goodbyes to his parents before walking off on deck in hopes of at least running into him.

Luckily, Hinata found Komaeda sitting on one of the lounge chairs available on deck; calmly drinking his morning tea. His hair kept getting tossed by the breeze that blew every once in awhile. Komaeda would then tuck a strand of hair behind his ear to keep them from getting to his face, with graceful nimble fingers. He moved them aside as he continued to sip his tea. Leg tucked on top of the other with his gaze slanted low. Like a painting, Komaeda emitted elegance and grandeur despite the simplicity of his attire.

Hinata felt himself slowly blush at the sight, his throat becoming dry as he watched the scene unfold in front of him.

The moment Hinata came to his vision, a gentle smile carefully formed on Komaeda’s face as his breathy voice greeted him. “Good morning, Hinata-kun.”

“Morning, Komaeda. Mind if I join you?”

“Only if you don’t mind spending your time with someone like me.”

“Ha?” Hinata asked bewildered, “Why wouldn’t I? Anyways, did you have breakfast yet?” He said while seating himself.

Komaeda gave a courtesy smile, “I don’t have much of an appetite today. How about you?”

“I just had mine.”

Hinata did notice how thin and frail Komaeda was. He wondered if he eats at all.

“The ocean is beautiful, isn’t it?” Komaeda said as he looked at the vast blue ocean, smiling ahead against the breeze and closing his eyes to the warmth of the sun.

Hinata couldn’t help but smile. “It certainly is.”

“Say, Hinata-kun. If I may ask, why did you board this ship?

Hinata tapped on the table nervously. He didn’t know where to start, after all, he couldn’t just tell him that his parents wanted their talentless son to have a chance at becoming one of the elites by marrying one of their daughters; surely it was a boring story to tell.

But, he was encouraged to grab this rare chance and instead talk about his own dreams. Ones that he usually couldn’t express out loud, one he felt discouraged to follow for the sake of what his parents want him to be instead.

If he were to talk about himself and his dreams, he would say…

“Like many dreamers on this ship, I want to experience something new, rare and different from what I could ever think of in life. An adventure. A fiery love. A new world to explore. That’s what I want to see in the new world. Begin a life of my own and possibly touch the hearts of hundreds or even thousands. I want to make a change, and if not on a big scale, at least on a smaller one. Or one person. Knowing because of me I had changed someone’s life for the better is truly a  wonderful means to live trough life. Like a teacher to his students. Haha, I’m not mostly confident in myself but I’d really want to see that happen.”

Hinata looked over to the sky with a solemn sad smile, eyes churned in a hopeful dreamy manner as he continued, “I want to build a future where my parents would feel proud of me, a future where I can really give it my all to make a change in society, maybe cause a revolution against the despair lurking in our world. To fight for the weak, to fight for justice.” Gradually his eyes glistened and filled with ambition when he visualized such a future in his mind as he spoke the words. Filling him with hope and aspiration to reach for such a dream, a nobody like him, making change to the world. He was not as infatuated with hope as much as Komaeda was but he could clearly feel it.

“I want to be remembered for my own efforts and not through propaganda or fame. Not by my family’s name or my status.”

To Komaeda, Hinata acted like a real elite, all dignified and calm and that drew Komaeda’s eyes to him. His eyes glistened with interest when Hinata talked about such a hopeful dream, like Hinata had this air of power, influence and wealth, and besides all that, he shined the brightest because of his many hopes.

To Komaeda, Hinata was considered as a diamond in the rough.

Hinata didn’t realize how much he had been talking since Komaeda was silent throughout his long speech.

“Oh, I apologize. I’ve been ranting nonstop.”

Komaeda took a deep breath then his lungs exasperated a shivery breath.

“Nonsense, Hinata-kun. _Nothing_ was more beautiful than listening to your hope-inspiring dreams. You’ve lit a fire in me because I’ve never seen someone’s hope shining so brightly before.”

Hinata’s cheeks flared at the wording. He didn’t know if Komaeda had noticed his odd ways of expression or suggestive phrases but it always had an effect on him.

Such a phrase would be taken from novels of fiery romantic stories. _To light a fire in someone._ And even if Komaeda hadn’t meant anything by it, it did mean he had touched someone’s heart with his words and that alone gave him a taste of what his dream would be like. And certainly after what Komaeda had went through in his life, he’d certainly would want to light a fire in him. Not... _in that sense_ of course, certainly not. Undoubtedly, that would be beyond disreputable.

* * *

After their little heart-to-heart, Hinata and Komaeda headed to the lounge and ended up playing a game of cards.

It unnerved him a little that even while playing a casual game, Komaeda constantly wore that unreadable smile, and while he couldn’t read his facial features, that smile he always wore made him a little bit more conscious of himself. After all, Komaeda always cheered for him whenever he placed a good move.

“How about that, Komaeda! You can’t beat this set, can you?”

Just when Hinata was starting to feel confident as the cards came to his favor one after the other, it was right after when he was feeling triumphant as he placed his final move, was he truly shocked.

Komaeda hummed as he looked over his cards, with only one move left, he drew his last card and gave a small warm laugh.

“Haha, I’m sorry Hinata-kun, but it seems I've won this match.” He said as he placed down all his cards.

Hinata gawked, not believing his eyes. What such luck to have drawn that last card!

Komaeda couldn’t contain another laugh when he saw Hinata’s reaction.

“How did you do that?”

‘With luck, of course.”

“Unbelievable. I was about to win too.”

“Haha, I’m sorry.”

“I’m not having it. Come on, we’re playing another round.”

“If you must.”

‘His luck truly is amazing.’ Hinata thought as he tried to focus this time around.

A few minutes had passed since the second round before Hinata finally cheered in glee. “YES! Got you.”

“Splendid, Hinata-kun! Your hope has finally shined through in the end.”

Feeling very satisfied, he thought of how much he enjoyed Komaeda’s company.

“Say Komaeda, have you heard that the ship has a pool on board? We can go swimming sometime.”

Komaeda hummed in thought. “I’m not really comfortable showing skin…”

He locked eyes with Hinata as he said jokingly, “... but I don’t mind if you want to see me naked, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata blinked as his face gradually grew hot, “What are you saying Komaeda?!”

“Haha, it’s just a joke, Hinata-kun. No one would actually want to see me in such a manner unless you really do want to.”

Hinata frowned shyly. “Quit making such jokes.”

“Oh, was the joke inappropriate? How foolish of me. Forgive me, Hinata-kun.”

“N-no, don't be.”

_It's not like I want to... w-what am I saying? ..._

Looking closely, he could see how frail Komaeda’s body truly was; he had pale skin, white hair with only the ends dyed a different color, and his breathy voice, they all indicate that Komaeda might be sick but he didn’t want to pry by asking.

“It’s alright if you don’t want to go. It was just a suggestion.”

“It really makes me happy that you considered inviting someone like me, Hinata-kun. If you really don’t mind spending time with a nobody like me, I could never refuse such an offer.”

“Hey, don’t say that, Komaeda. I enjoy spending my time with you.”

Komaeda gave Hinata one long look before smiling warmly at him.

Looking at the time, Hinata couldn’t believe how much had already passed. It was nearing lunch time after all and since Komaeda didn't have anything to eat all day, he urged Komaeda to join him for lunch to which he gladly accepted.

Once seated, they ordered their lunches and made small conversation up until their food was served.

As they ate, Hinata didn’t realize how long he had been watching Komaeda eat until Komaeda had met his eyes and smiled at him, clearly not bothered with the attention.

Just as they finished their plates, a waitress walked to them and suggested trying out their special giant parfait that only sells 5 each day. Luckily, they have only one left.

“Would you like me to order it for you, sir?”

Hinata was about to refuse until Komaeda beamed with joy.

“What luck! We’ll take one to share.”

The waitress smiled and left to bring them their order while Hinata blushed at the notion. Two guys sharing one parfait in the middle of the cafe like some dating couple.

“... to share, you say… are you… alright with that, really?” Hinata said with a fluster.

“Oh, how silly of me. Would you have rather wanted the dessert for yourself, Hinata-kun?

Hinata blinked, “No, of course not.”

“Haha, well if you don’t mind then.”

Soon, the waitress brought the truly gigantic parfait and two spoons. Hinata was a little flustered at the idea of anybody watching them but Komaeda acted like there was no care in the world. He picked up his spoon and took a spoonful and placed it in his mouth. Hinata found himself staring at the pair of pink lips as they wrapped themselves around the silver metal, and then slowly slipping out as his throat swallowed.

 _Those lips_. The more he stared at the curves, the texture, the flush of pink color, the sweetness of the parfait on them, the more his curiosity grew, wondering what those lips might taste like if he-

In that instant, Komaeda looked over Hinata with a smile, making Hinata’s cheeks burn hot with embarrassment when he realized that he was staring yet again.

Feeling nervous, Hinata could feel butterflies in his stomach, so he tried willing the feeling away by trying the parfait and found it absolutely delicious. Komaeda took another spoonful before placing his spoon down.

Hinata looked up at him in confusion, “You’re done already?”

“Haha, I’m not really into sweets. I prefer... salty treats.”

“Huh? Then why did you order it?”

“Because it was a lucky offer and I wanted you to have it, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata couldn’t suppress the smile. Komaeda was really strange but in a good way. He felt their bond was getting stronger.

* * *

The sun was dazzling hotter that day as Hinata and Komaeda walked together on deck.

As they were about to take a turn, Hinata looked over Komaeda and his face slowly turned from smiling to pale as Komaeda seemed to have lost balance and dropped on the floor.

“K-Komaeda!”

With panic, Hinata quickly dropped down next to him and held Komaeda up in his arms, shaking him but Komaeda had already fainted.

“S-someone, help!”

People gathered around them and some offered help to carry him to the infirmary.

* * *

The on-board doctor inspected Komaeda and turned to Hinata who clearly wore a worried look.

“Relax relax, he just had a heatstroke.”

“A-A heatstroke?”

“Some people came in today with mild dizziness from the heat. Don’t worry. He’ll be fine. But he does seem frail so you better take good care of him. Are you two friends?”

“U-uhm, we just met yesterday on the ship.”

“I see.”

Hinata dreaded that there might be something more but the doctor wouldn’t say. He believed there was more to it than just a heatstroke. The amount of emotions from the adrenaline he just received exhausted him a little. He hadn’t witnessed someone fainting like that in front of him before. He sat beside Komaeda’s bedside waiting for him to wake up.

After a short while, Komaeda gradually opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling as he slowly tried making sense of his surroundings.

“Komaeda!” Hinata blurted out in relief, “Are you okay? How are you feeling?”

“Hinata...kun?” Komaeda blinked his eyes slowly, trying to remember what had happened so Hinata helped him remember.

“You fainted while we were having a stroll. The doctor said it was just a heatstroke.”

Komaeda wore an apologetic smile, “Oh, I’m sorry to have bothered you with this Hinata-kun.”

“Don’t be.”

Hinata stayed quiet for a few seconds, having the urge to ask but he was too embarrassed to. But he just had to know.

“Komaeda…,” Hinata started sfotly, “...when the doctor examined you, I think he wanted to tell me something more about your… well-being, but he didn't. Is there more to what happened to you than a simple heatstroke?” Hinata clenched his fists at the possibility, hoping he was wrong.

Komaeda gave him a small sad smile before sayin, “Well, I guess there is no meaning in hiding and it’s not a big deal anyway. My diagnosis. Unfortunately, I have stage 3 malignant lymphoma, accompanied by frontotemporal dementia.”

Hinata's face went pale. ‘N-Not a big deal? Those were, incredibly, big medical terms that don’t really sound like something to be considered as ' _Not a Big Deal._ ’

Komaeda closed his eyes as he said, “My cancer is not the one I’m most bothered with actually, but rather... the other disease. It causes my brain to deteriorate bit by bit even while I’m speaking to you right now. My life expectancy should be between half a year to a year. That’s what I’ve been told by my doctors at least but my luck has kept me alive all this time so I’m really thankful. This luck is the kind of hope that keeps me going. Because right after my diagnosis, I boarded this ship and met all of these people with wonderful talents! So I believe everything got balanced in the end, doesn't it?”

'What is he saying? How could that be considered balanced?!'

Hinata’s heart clenched the more Komaeda talked about it and to top it off, Komaeda was telling him this with that same smile he puts on. When Komaeda opened his eyes, they glimmered with light at the mere mentioning of the elites that it gave Hinata a sense of unease. How could Komaeda possibly smile and be full of cheerful hope when his own life was on the line.

Nothing could have saddened him more. Especially when Komaeda turned to him with that same warm smile and said, “On top of it all, I was lucky to meet you too, Hinata-kun.”

Guilt panged Hinata’s heart. It didn't settle well with him that Komaeda still believed he was an elite without correcting him. “Komaeda, the truth is...I’m not...really…a-an-”

The more he was close to blurt out the truth, the more he hesitated.

“Hinata-kun…” Komaeda interrupted.

Hinata jerked his downcast eyes at Komaeda’s solemn but smiling eyes.

“It’s going to be alright. No matter the despair that lurks, hope will always prevail.”

“How can you say that? How can you...vstay smiling like that?”

“Because hope is the only thing I’ve got, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata casted his eyes down once again in sorrow, clenching his fists that are resting on the top of his knees. Several emotions swirled in his heart and he didn't know how to truly feel.

“You don’t have to feel sorry for me, Hinata-kun. I’m sorry for being such a burden. To have bothered you with my troubles, I ask of you to forgive me. No good can come from getting involved with me. Haha, I guess this really is bad luck.”

“Don’t say that, Komaeda.”

Without thinking, Hinata reached out and held Komaeda’s hand tightly. “It’s probably good luck though, because now...I know more about you.” Hinata gave a reassuring smile and squeezed his hand tighter.

“Hinata...kun…”

Hinata didn’t want to show how upset he felt for Komaeda. His admiration grew knowing how much Komaeda keeps on smiling the way he did despite all what he was going through. He felt like he wanted to be there for him and help him lift off some of his burdens.

Hesitantly, Komaeda’s hand squeezed back, apparently touched by the gesture. “Thank you, Hinata-kun.”

Later, Komaeda tried to get up but Hinata was quick to hold him down with his other free hand. “Komaeda, you shouldn’t. The doctor advised me that you should stay and rest.”

“I see.” Komaeda said with an evident frown. “You don’t have to stay with me here, Hinata-kun. I’m sure there are more ways to use your time than wasting it on watching someone like me.”

“Honestly, if you keep on saying that, I’m going to get angry.” Hinata said with a smile.

Thinking back now, when Hinata mentioned the pool and Komaeda’s discomfort about showing skin, was it because Komaeda was ashamed of showing how frail he was? It saddened Hinata that Komaeda harbored such low self-esteem and feelings of self-hatred. He constantly demeaned himself. Hinata couldn’t imagine Komaeda as being anything less than admirable and wished he could see that for himself. He was extremely intelligent, knowledgeable and hopeful despite his misfortunes.

Hinata didn’t realize he still had his hand holding Komaeda’s, and when Hinata trailed off in his thoughts, his thumb caressed Komaeda’s gently without knowing. He might have missed Komaeda’s soft pink blush as well.

Hinata was so drawn into his thoughts, that he wore a sad smile while his eyes gazed upon that frail hand, the slim wrist, nerves sticking out against his pale skin and all what Hinata wanted to do was feel warmth in those calloused fingers. Komaeda’s hand was cold that Hinata unconsciously rubbed his fingers to warm it.

* * *

On the next day, there was a morning assembly for the elites in the lounge room. Individuals forming groups of discussions and soon chattering filled the exquisite furnished room.

It was hard trying to avoid Komaeda even if he wanted to among these assemblies and parties. This was especially true since he was constantly dragged by his parents to attend and converse with the different groups of elites. Not that he wouldn’t want to attend but he always felt nervous and these kinds of things always did remind him of his unfortunate lack of talent. Still, for his parents, he tried his best to blend in without feeling inferior.

While he was moving through the crowd aimlessly after leaving the last discussion group, he accidentally bumped into a girl and to his surprise, she hysterically apologized for not paying attention and wept over such a trivial matter that he felt compelled to comfort the poor girl. Besides, it was him who was supposed to apologize.

“I-It’s okay, no harm was done so please, don't cry.” He even offered her his handkerchief. The girl clearly was touched by the gesture that she went on weeping more tears.

He then learned her name was Mikan Tsumiki. Quite the charming young girl if you exclude the constant apologies and stammering. He enjoyed his time with her while his parents were happily observing from afar.

Suddenly, he felt compelled to turn his head when he heard a voice, spotting the boy who had been messing up with his head lately. It seemed Komaeda always stayed alone despite there being lots of individuals whom he can spend time with. His hands gripped into fists at the thought that Komaeda could be feeling lonely without his presence and he didn’t want to feel guilty, nor did he want to think that Komaeda might assume that he had got bored of him or something like that.

Instantly, his feet took him to where Komaeda was despite all the warning signs his brain threw his way

“Hello, Komaeda.”

“Hinata-kun.” Komaeda turned to him with that beautiful smile of his and Hinata’s heart skipped a beat upon hearing his name on that smooth, breathy voice.

“Why don't you join the party? You're always spending your time alone.”

“I wouldn't want to bother anyone with my presence.”

“You never bothered me with your presence, Komaeda.”

“Haha, I don't deserve such words, Hinata-kun.”

Taking a seat next to him, Hinata asked, “Standing alone amidst the crowd, what is going through that mind of yours?”

“Nothing of importance. But it’s just a lovely sight to behold, the hope filling this very room.”

Hinata chuckled, “Hope inspires you, doesn’t it?”

“How about you, Hinata-kun? Are you enjoying the party?”

“Possibly more so than yesterday.”

“Ah, yes, I did just see you spending some time with Tsumiki-san, the elite nurse.”

“Y-Yeah, I’m sure my parents are lurking by, watching me, happy and giddy to have seen me talk with her.”

Komaeda's eyes beamed with excitement when he realized what Hinata had meant. “Wouldn’t that be wonderful, Hinata-kun? Two elites forming a family together, your hopes and talents would shine even brighter."

Hinata scoffed, “Don’t just go and marry me off without my consent. Who knows, I may have someone else in mind.” Hinata said with his eyes locked with Komaeda.

Komaeda’s smile widened and his cunning eyes slanted ingeniously as he said, “Is that a proposal, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata toppled over, reacting hysterically through a coughing fit because he didn't expect that at all. Komaeda continued to look at him with a seemingly, innocent demeanor.

_He was definitely doing it on purpose, right? Always acting so ambiguously... I could never get Komaeda under his skin._

Hinata felt like a complete fool and it surprised him that Komaeda was't bothered at all by joking around like that.

Komaeda laughed as he said, "You don't need to take that so seriously, Hinata-kun."

His laugh melted away Hinata's nervousness and filled his heart with warmth. The sun that reflected through the windows didn’t help lessen the feeling as the light illuminated his beautiful features. Hinata just couldn't help but fondly smile and join in with his laughter. He was looking forward to spending the rest of the day with Komaeda.

* * *

As Hinata tucked himself in bed, his thoughts weren't occupied by anything except for one thing; the boy who had been giving him mixed feelings, ones he had never experienced before.

Just the mere thought of him left his heart beating quite uncomfortably and a little fast.

Was it nervousness? Or was it the disappointment because of their differences in status; him being an elite while he's not?

This feeling... felt like a  _rush_. But why?

That kind of rush only came before some sort of examination, or from expecting something favorable to happen, or trying something new and dangerous or possibly...

 _love_?

Hinata snorted as he thought to himself, 'That is surely notwhat this is. It can't be! That's because Komaeda is...'

Hinata's eyes gradually widened when he realized what had happened throughout the day; the butterflies, the nervousness, and recalling those lips and how much he desired to-

'No, no! Stop it! You can't actually be falling for...I mean you can't. He's...'

_...a man._

But the more he thought about it the more his heart thumped and his blush deepened.

It was way too wrong to think of him that way.

Besides, he had only just met him. What if he learned about this? He'd definitely be offended.

He was thinking this all wrong. This infatuation or whatever for Komaeda must have been mistakenly confused with just his simple admiration for him and nothing else. Besides, his parents would definitely reprimand him for harboring such bizarre thoughts.

"It's just admiration," he said reassuringly as he snuggled under the covers. His eyes then slanted lower as the thought lingered, and soon he found himself brushing the tip of his lips with his fingers while his cheeks burned lightly at the thought of him. That's when Hinata reached a decision.

For the sake of avoiding such awkwardness and tension, and for the sake of respecting Komaeda, he would have to deal with these strange feelings sooner than later.

 _Probably it's best to avoid him altogether,_ he thought before going to sleep.

* * *

The bedroom was dim-lighted, illuminated only by the light of a single bedside lamp. The decorated walls were shadowed by two figures.

Hinata was then pushed against the silky, crimson bed that had matching vintage curtains draped on each side. The figure before him leaned closer with his body, hovering over him, making Hinata lie down fully on the soft mattress. Hinata placed his hands against the figure's clothed chest, touching and rubbing, disheveling his shirt, revealing that pale smooth skin underneath as his hands roamed freely.

“ _Hinata-kun.._.” The voice moaned softly as they hovered over his lips and Hinata's smile melted into one of lust.

That unmistakable, breathy voice echoed through Hinata's ears as he pulled the figure closer to him. He pushed back those soft, white locks with his fingers and cupped his face to gaze at his beautiful features while he drowned into those beautiful pale-green eyes.

Those eyes that gazed back filled him up with so many emotions that all melted into one single desire.

Hinata lowered his gaze to those soft lips that were curved into one gentle smile. Those lips closed in and pressed against his, making Hinata close his eyes and sigh through his nose as he relished in the softness of that kiss. Hinata kept hold on his curved neck as he continuously pulled and sucked on those lips. It was slow and wet but it was his taste and so nothing else mattered. Hinata's lips met with his again and again in yearning for his warmth like he had been longing for them for so long.

Hinata wrapped his arms around the figure, roaming his hands over him in circular motions, clutching on his loosened shirt in fear that he might slip way.

The figure thenpulled up, breaking the kiss. Hinata caressed his cheek and tilted his head in question of why did they stop. The figure then smiled before his image started to disappear, fading away like smoke. Hinata panicked, reaching out for him before his eyes shot open.

With one single gasp, Hinata looked around his room and realized the dream was over with a tingling sensation remaining on his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed round 2! Waiting to hear from you all. Leave a comment and I'll reply right away back to you. ^^
> 
> Which part you loved most?
> 
>  
> 
> Check Tumblr under the tags "my edit" or "my fic" to see my Komahina edits, and my Youtube for Komahina AMVs.  
> Tumblr: http://moonlessnight126.tumblr.com/  
> Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/moonlessnight126


	3. Books and Cigars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks and kisses to my friend Mihori for taking time out of her busy schedule to help editing this chapter! <3333

**Books and Cigars**

Hinata woke with a start, heart beating fast from the dream he just had. Not because it was horrifying though, but because it touched hidden desires that he didn't even know he had while conscious.

_And it was...beauti-_

_No, no!_

_It can never be!_

Hinata swallowed and buried his face in the pillow.

_It's wrong of me to think of him in such a manner._

_...But is it really?_

_I want to be close to him. I want to hold him and...a-and... kis-_

Hinata’s face heated up at the thought, the dream still fresh in his mind. If he were to dare to allow himself to dwell on it for a few minutes…

Hinata found himself smiling at the thought. If he could just break free from the social codes and limitations, he would…

_‘I'd pull him in my arms to comfort him, hold his face close and caress his cheek, telling him how beautiful he is and I just know, he'd smile. Then, I'd lift his chin and lean in even closer until our lips would touch...’_

Hinata turned on his back, facing the ceiling. A smile playing on his lips as a soft blush caressed his cheeks. The sun gently lit up the room, staging the rise of morning and beginning of the new day.

The sound of faint footsteps outside his room brought him back to reality and he started to feel guilty for having thoughts of such feelings with both his parents just outside. Breathing in deeply to calm himself, he heaved a sigh and stood, preparing himself to act passively. He wouldn't approach Komaeda but rather, as Komaeda would put it, he’d just let luck bring them together.

* * *

 Following quietly as both of his parents strolled through the hallways and into the lounge, his breathing hitched as he saw, out of all the possible places he could be, the lone male he had been thinking of for a while now, Komaeda, seated calmly and elegantly, by the corner, sipping tea, with a book in his hand.

Komaeda looked like he was getting in too deep with his book that he didn't want to bother him. Besides, he was with his parents at the moment.

“Oh, there she is! Hajime dear, look over there. That's Koizumi, the girl I talked to you about. We talked with her and her parents yesterday.”

As soon as both their parents saw each other, they had chatted up immediately and proceeded to invite one another to eat together. With the group assembled their circle grew.

Hinata thought of how interesting Koizumi actually was. She seemed very confident in herself and teased him about his nervous replies but he did enjoy her company. Her photographs were also quite beautiful. Nothing less to expect from an elite. Her dream was to take photography to the next level and capture the vibrant colors of the world in pictures. With her talent, she could surely reach that possibility one day.

Somehow, Hinata could only think less of himself because of his lack and how it deepened the hollowness in his heart, knowing of Komaeda's fascination with talent.

Hinata's mother scooted closer to Hinata and whispered in his ear, “What do you think, Hajime? Isn't she charming?”

 _Charming_ …

At the very mention of the word, Hinata couldn't help but peek sideways, his eyes trailing over the place to rest on the very corner, to a certain uncanny boy, seated so comfortably against the chair with his leg crossed over the other, gaze melting onto the pages he was reading. He just looked so serene that he couldn't take his eyes off.

His eyes were glued to him and his heartbeat slowly became louder. A steady pace that slowly started to drum in his ears and just like that, everything else melted around him until it was just him and Komaeda in the room.

“Hajime?”

Hinata snapped out of his trance and looked over at his mother.

“Were you listening?”

“Y-yes, mother.”

But before they could say any more, Koizumi beamed with excitement as she said, “Do you mind if I take a picture?”

Hinata’s parents looked over at her and considered the offer, thinking that it would be a good opportunity to have an elite photograph them. They smiled, agreeing to her request, “Sure, go right ahead!”

Koizumi then looked over at Hajime and asked him, “Why don’t you join in?” Hinata considered this and then nodded, giving her a courteous smile as he stood next to his parents. Koizumi then counted down from three and took a picture of the family.

Their smiles were immediately wiped afterward, with the picture taken, he finally had the time to discreetly look over to where he knew Komaeda was but he was no longer there.

His heart skipped a beat.

_Where did Komaeda go?_

“Hajime!”

The tone of his mother brought him back from his thoughts.

“Where is your mind at, son?” His father had said.

“S-sorry. I'm not feeling too well this morning.”

“Hmm, do you want me to call for Tsumiki-san?” Koizumi intervened.

“No, no. That won't be... necessary.”

As the time passed, he could feel his heart hammer even more deeply in his chest. He wanted to go to him. To talk about all sorts of things and marvel at his hopeful speeches. No, he didn’t just want that. He wanted even more. He...He wanted to…

 _….push Komaeda against the wooden oak wall, pressing his lips with his in a passionate spur of the moment. Arms roaming_ ** _,_ ** _holding and clutching desperately on clothes, getting them loose for his eyes, with their lips pursed and their mouths slowly melting into one another. Breaths slowly getting uneven between heated kisses, wanting and desiring to feel under the clothes..._

Hinata's face heated at the boldness of his shameless imagination and he couldn't put a finger as to where these desires were coming from.

“Hajime, you do look a bit flushed. Maybe we should arrange a checkup with the doctor?” His mother had told him, concern obvious in her speech.

Hinata didn't know what to say so he simply nodded and excused himself with an apologetic smile.

He needed to cool his head.

* * *

 Hinata leaned on the railings outside, breathing in the much needed fresh air into his lungs as he slowly tried to will the thoughts away.

He just couldn't understand this strange attraction that he was feeling. He couldn't find any rhyme or reason, it really did bother him. _Why? Why him? It's stupid. It really is._ Like he has fallen for a maiden in distress who didn't even need his calling. Was his brain wired wrong? It's not like Komaeda fostered any female features. Why did he feel such a strange pull towards him?

He was just creating a reason to dishonor himself and Komaeda. He should really just put a stop to this. With a determined look, he vowed to clean his conscious of any absurdity and simply enjoy the company of the boy who intrigued him so much.

“Hinata-kun?”

Hinata blinked in surprise, his eyes turning to find Komaeda standing next to him.

“K-Komaeda…”

“You seem distressed. Is there anything that someone as mundane as I can offer to comfort you somewhat?”

Unbelievably, Hinata's heart felt light with just his simple presence and a smile quickly formed on his face before he even realized it. “You already did. I… think, I just wanted to spend today… with you.”

Komaeda seemed surprised; like it wasn't obvious enough even with as many times as they already had spent together that he'd want to have more.

They walked around on deck, having a bit of small talk as they joked about a few things. Obviously, it was Komaeda attempting to be funny, riling him up just for laughs, but the lightness of the conversation eased the weight on his chest and made him smile.

Suddenly out of nowhere, someone came from behind Komada and bumped him by accident. Komaeda’s body was pushed forward by the force toward Hinata who held his arms out in surprise to catch him, holding him up before he could fall.  
  
“Sorry,” the man apologized as he walked away.  
  
“Are you okay, Komaeda?” Hinata asked with concern as the boy held onto him, his face on his shoulder.  
  
“I’m okay, Hinata-kun… and, thank you.” Komaeda said the words against his neck.  
  
“Do-don’t mention it.” Hinata’s cheeks flared up for those few seconds that he had his arms wrapped around Komaeda’s waist and him speaking against his neck.

It took Komaeda a while and in those few seconds it seemed Komaeda was holding onto him, like a lover holding on the other for warmth but he wasn’t sure if his brain was only assuming things. 

Hinata felt like holding onto Komaeda, embracing him tightly in his arms in a way that would show him that he cared. But that would appear foolish and awkward. He did just meet the boy a mere two days ago and to think that he already harbored such sentiments would be strange. But, somehow, after learning a bit more about his misfortunes, he really didn’t want Komaeda to feel that he was only pitying him.  
  
Komaeda respectfully pushed himself back as he wore a smile that left Hinata’s heart pounding as he shyly looked away.

* * *

 For a while, they had hung out by the deck and just talked about their lives. Hinata was particularly animated when he talked about freedom and of breaking free from his parents and starting a life on his own, away from their rules. Komaeda, as he listened, felt inspired as he thought about wanting to help Hinata make use of freedom to clearly express himself. To break free from the good boy act and run wild.

"Hinata-kun, I feel we have the same aura. It's a feeling I get when we're together." Komaeda said as he turned his head and smiled.

Keeping that smile as Hinata turned his own towards him, Komaeda asked, "Hinata-kun, what do you think hope is?

Taking some time to think, he replied with, "I'm not really sure."

Komaeda beamed with joy about hope and freedom of expression that he stretched his arms wide against the wind and gave the feeling of flying while Hinata stared in awe **.**

Komaeda wanted to show Hinata some more, and so he gave another example.

“Komaeda, w-what are you doing? That's dangerous.”

Komaeda climbed over the railings of the top deck and gave one look at Hinata, who was right behind him. Directing a smile right at him before jumping over.

As the passengers gasped, Hinata reached and grabbed the railing and looked down below, fearing the worst.

His heart skipped a beat though at the sight that he saw. Instead of a bloody and probably broken Komaeda, he saw a smiling radiant face below him, white strands of hair blowing in his face as he waved at him to jump down as well.

“Come on! Try it, Hinata-kun!”

Hinata, feeling elevated at the beautiful smile he had just received, gained courage and so stepped on the railings as well, and with no second thoughts at all, jumped.

Thinking of Komaeda only, he fell from the top and landed on the top of a tent, bouncing over it soon afterward and then landing roughly in front of Komaeda.

Hinata didn't have time to celebrate before a crew member came and yelled at them from the top for how reckless that was. Before they were about to be scolded more, Hinata grabbed Komaeda's hand and the two went running off.

Feeling a bit of remorse but no shame at all, he smiled wide even as they were shouted at to come back, and probably upon realizing they were elites, the crew member silenced right away.

As they reached safety, with the adrenaline still high, Hinata laughed so hard. It was the first time he had laughed that much from the heart. Komaeda joined him with soft chuckles, although a little breathless from all the running. Still, Hinata called Komaeda crazy, but he wouldn't dare say that he enjoyed every bit of crazy Komaeda had to offer out loud.

Getting unbalanced on his feet with how hard he was laughing, Komaeda had to pull up Hinata and steady him as he joined him with light laughs.

Their laughs blended together as Hinata leaned onto Komaeda against the wall. Hinata could feel his heart racing. He wanted nothing more than to grab those lips with his own and drink in his beautiful laughter.

Slowly, Hinata's laughter died out and was only met with Komaeda's gentle smile.

Staring into his beautiful pale-green eyes, Hinata felt drawn to his lips but he tried to contain himself from doing so.

Komaeda didn't seem to mind the closeness though as he beamed with excitement,“ See Hinata-kun? The greatest pleasure of expressing freedom is through doing crazy and unpredictable things. Life becomes more exciting, doesn't it? That’s why humans are lured to the wrong and taboo because it intrigues them. That no matter how bad or vile the act is, hope will shine beautifully and draw the greatest form of pleasure from it. Don't you agree?"

That phrase drew Hinata to translate his infatuations with Komaeda as taboo too, at that moment, it just clearly punched him in his gut, to be reminded that a man to man relationship is considered taboo.

_A taboo that might give birth to something beautiful and draw the greatest pleasure from?_

With solemn eyes, Hinata unconsciously tucked a strand of white locks from Komaeda's face behind his ear, his thumb caressing one stroke against his cheek, thinking admirably how rosy they've turned from the running.

Pale-green eyes simply stared deep into Hinata's own eyes, his lips falling open at the touch.

"I suppose so."

Komaeda's eyes seemed to glint with joy, squinting his eyes lovingly. His lips lifted to a beautiful carefree smile before saying, "What should I do? I might start liking you even more, Hinata-kun."

Hinata felt a strong beat in his heart, trembling, as his eyes widened in proportions.

"To tell you the truth, I'm really happy, Hinata-kun. Despite learning about my luck and sickness, you're still willing to share your time with me. You are definitely someone who embodies hope."

Feeling suddenly alarmed with how quick his heart was beating, Hinata pulled himself back and turned his head away to hide his blush.

"Don't say embarrassing things like that out of the blue, Komaeda." He murmured shyly.

 _Stop making me feel this way,_ he thought silently.

Komaeda simply gave a soft hearty laugh.

Nobody could deny that Komaeda was an enigma that he tried to understand. The more he opened up to him, the more Hinata grew infatuated with him. Even if his views of life were a tad unheard of, it held a bit of truth and Komaeda’s uncharacteristic uniqueness made life a bit more thrilling and he just couldn’t get enough. At least compared to his dull routine. Knowing how this trip would take only a few days before everything ended, scared Hinata. To think, that he might not be able to see Komaeda again, it was unbearable, but he knew it was the way life was supposed to work out, so instead of sulking, he resolved himself to make their trip as memorable as possible.

Soon they started walking and talking about books.

Whilst Hinata’s parents had always forced him to read the classics, Komaeda took to reading at his own pleasure. In doing so, he had learned of books filled with the taboo such as violence and eroticism. All that filled him with awe. They had gone on to such topics that his parents wouldn't have dared to tread on and it thrilled him to know how Komaeda had so much knowledge about this. He also basked in the fact that he and Komaeda could share conversations like this.

Komaeda turned toward Hinata, head cocking to the side with a smile so sly yet so innocent at the same time, and said, “You can come to my room and read all about it, Hinata-kun.”

_Komaeda's room?_

_He shouldn't. Not when his desires were still pent up. Not when-_

“Okay.”

* * *

It was already nearing dusk when Komaeda invited Hinata to his room. The soft glow of the sun setting illuminated the lavish room in a soft blend of orange.

Hinata felt butterflies picking up as he entered the room. It was neat and pristine, a very expensive lavished room. Books were neatly kept on the table, and some more on the bed stand. He watched as Komaeda headed for the couch, and silently nodded his head after a bit of coaxing for Hinata to follow suit. Komaeda then seated himself on the and patted on the space next to him. Hinata smiled at the gesture and seated himself next to him.

Looking the place over, he noticed some medical bottles behind piled books and upon realizing what they were for, his face contorted to one of sadness. It was such a shame that Komaeda would fall mercy under such illnesses when he could give so much.

Komaeda was the one who started the conversation as he talked about a particular read he had tried recently containing erotica, making Hinata give all sorts of faces and Komaeda laughed softly at his reaction. It was such a tease too because Komaeda was right within his reach.

“Have you ever experienced copulation, Hinata-kun?”

“C-copulation?”

“Sexual intercourse.”

“I know what it means!” Hinata huffed, flustered at Komaeda's apparent boldness on the subject. “And… No”, Hinata replied quietly.

“Do you want to?” Komaeda asked as he crossed his legs and leaned towards him rather curiously.

Cheeks ablaze as his heart skipped a beat at the sudden notion as Hinata turned his head and stared wide-eyed at Komaeda. He didn't know what to make of Komaeda's facial expression. He gazed at the agile smile, eyes squinted suggestively. Was he? Was he really? Or maybe, was he just reading him wrong?

But Hinata calmed down after a while of breathing in deep. When he felt confident enough not to stutter and blush by his next words, he answered him with his honest opinion, saying, “Anyone would and it’s not hard to find someone to do it with but, for me, I’d want to share the experience with someone dear to me, someone I love. It wouldn’t mean anything otherwise. At least, that’s what I believe.”

“That’s... _really_ beautiful, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata snorted jokingly, “You think so?”

“Definitely.”

“What about you Komaeda?”

Komaeda hummed thoughtfully. “Hinata-kun...Would you believe me if I tell you I wouldn’t mind being used as long as it’s for the sake of bringing hope to the people who had lost it?”

“What...do you mean? Don’t tell me that you’d _actually_ allow someone to defile you, Komaeda? Just for that?!”

Komaeda looked unconcerned with what he had said. His face remained passive as he stared back at Hinata without any hint of shame, telling him, “I haven’t really thought of it in any other way. If anyone would want to use this worthless body of mine for any kind of value, that alone would make me happy, Hinata-kun. Even if it means I would give until I lose everything I have to my name, nothing would bring me greater joy.”

“What are you saying? I don’t understand at all! You wouldn’t be giving anyone anything. You’d only be giving yourself away!” Hinata had said in reply, his voice rising as he shouted trying to somewhat rid Komaeda of such horrible thoughts by screaming as loud as he can that he’d hear nothing but his voice alone.

Hinata noted how Komaeda at least looked surprised at his outburst.

To find out in this way how engraved Komaeda’s feelings of low self-esteem truly was hurt Hinata. Why would Komaeda constantly devalue himself like that? Why couldn’t he see his worth more?

Taking deep breaths, he tried to calm himself down after his sudden outburst, seeing how even with all his screaming, nothing appeared to have affected Komaeda much. “You said you didn’t want to die alone, Komaeda. You said you wanted to find somebody to love. When you do, they won’t think of you as worthless nor will they use you for it. That’s what I believe...at least.” Hinata shyly looked away, his voice lowering to a quiet tone.

Komaeda’s lips formed a smile at the words and he may have seemed touched at least, “You are so kind, Hinata-kun.”

‘It’s you Komaeda, who doesn’t see the value of yourself,’ Hinata thought.

The conversation flowed normally after that, well, at least somewhat normally as they had soon gone to talk about murder stories. Komaeda was evidently passionate about the subject and Hinata laughed it off nervously. He wondered if Komaeda ever thought of murdering someone before. He entertained the subject just to watch Komaeda talk, discussing cases they have read before in newspapers and on the news. Whilst Hinata talked about finding justice, Komaeda was more focused on the murder itself, its motives and relished in the despair it caused and the hope it would later bring undoubtedly.

It was during these moments where Hinata felt mostly cautious of Komaeda. Thinking of how it was almost as if Komaeda would do anything to bring the greatest hope he could possibly bring about.

He thought about it a bit more and wondered if maybe the reason for his aversion was because he thought of how it wasn’t normal for someone to speak so openly of such themes. **Sex** , **murder** ... _and_ Komaeda did have his moments where he’d say something very suggestive or strange which could be understood or misinterpreted wrongly. Was it because of this nature that he was always alone? Hinata found himself sometimes disturbed yet drawn to him despite his unbound social behavior. It was like discovering a whole new world of possibilities and opening new horizons with him. Something he wouldn’t have experienced lest he followed his parents’ codes and regulations.

As Hinata tried to think about other things, his attention was drawn away as he picked up a random book from the table in front of him and flipped through the pages until he stopped coincidently on a certain scene. He read the lines of a woman’s inner monologue speaking of her distress over her secret love _affair,_ and the scandal it would cause, as well as the fear of her family disowning her. Unnecessary feeling strangely gripped his own heart at her distress. Thinking then, if he was actually sympathizing with her?

She described the affair to be so scandalous that if the truth was to be known, her reputation would be tarnished. But the love she held for her lover ran so deep that she would sacrifice anything to be with him. Hinata leaned on his arm, holding the other book up with his hand as he inquisitively continued reading. His fingers stretched flat at the seat, hips scooped forward whilst his long legs relaxed rather openly from one another. He was so focused on reading that his body took a comfortable posture like he was in his own room.

Komaeda looked over the book Hinata was holding and smiled insidiously.

“Komaeda, how did this story end?” Curious as to how the woman solved her distressing situation. He wondered if it was hopefully a happy one?

Still sitting crossed legged, Komaeda scooped closer to look into the book that Hinata was holding up, leaning on his own arm, hand barely inches away from Hinata’s. The tip of their fingers barely brushed, shoulders touching, with the air so still in Hinata's lungs that he couldn't breathe as Komaeda went on to explain the events of the story, that of which seemed to go over his head, understanding not a word of it. Instead, he felt the words swirl around his vision that the page looked blurry, his ears losing hearing and his mind falling into a daze.

“-and then she... Hinata...kun? Are you listening?”

Hinata’s train of thought was suddenly halted as he was called out, turning his face toward Komaeda, which was a big mistake considering that Komaeda was looking right at him and he was fairly close.

Hinata's face flushed and eyes stood still in shock.

Komaeda tilted his head in question, “Hinata-kun?”

Hinata's shocked eyes gradually melted to warm ones as the heat spread across his cheeks and up to his ears. He peeked at those lips and he immediately felt drawn to them.

 _A love affair_ … A loud buzzing sounded in his head, overlapping voices told him unpleasant things as he thought, the voices echoed so horridly inside his brain, alarming him of its immorality and sinfulness… But what was so horrid about it in the first place?

Hesitantly, Hinata's lips quivered as he leaned forward. Komaeda's eyes slanted in confusion but apparently not minding the close proximity. Hinata’s fingers slowly crawled to the other as if trespassing on forbidden territories, nuzzling, brushing with hesitant caresses, slowly entangling Komaeda's fingers with his own. One solemn thought swirled in Hinata’s mind. _Could there be a slight chance that Komaeda might return his affections?_

Komaeda’s eyes told of so many confusing emotions that he was unable to read the situation at hand. But for unknown reasons, Komaeda’s lips felt as if they were slowly leaning closer to Hinata's.

_...As if they were wired together by strings, unaware of their movements as their consciousness was put to sleep._

Their lips got closer and closer until they were mere centimeters apart and Komaeda’s eyes were slowly closing while Hinata’s heart was beginning to beat louder and louder, his fingers grew numb by the second.

Slowly, they inched closer, but just as he thought they were about to meet and finally share a kiss, a rather loud thump was heard as the book he was holding fell on the ground with a loud smack that jolted both men to alertness. Hinata and Komaeda stared in shock for a few seconds before Hinata quickly snatched his eyes away, looking everywhere but at Komaeda’s as he swiped his hand from his and hastily bent down to retrieve the fallen book, quickly apologizing.

As he sat there, facing away from Komaeda, Hinata didn't dare look back. Not wanting to see what sort of face Komaeda was making and what kind reaction Komaeda had on at the moment.

“Hinata-kun?”

Hinata released the breath he didn’t know he was holding and quickly placed the book on the table. “It’s nothing.” Hinata then turned around with an awkward smile. “I’m s-sorry. I just felt dizzy for a moment there.”

But Komaeda could see the distress on Hinata’s face and apparently it unnerved him a little but Hinata couldn’t help it.

Komaeda shrugged, smiled lightly and dismissed Hinata's stammering by bringing out a metal case from the drawer. Upon opening it, revealed two cigars and a lighter beside them. "Hinata-kun, look here," he said to break the awkwardness. "I found this by the deck and picked it up by chance. I did look for the owner though, but since I couldn't find a trace of who it might have belonged to, I just took it with me. Would you like to try one as well? I haven't smoked before, and this will be my first one. Do you smoke, Hinata-kun?"

“Seriously, how did you get your hands on these?” Hinata had asked honestly surprised.

Komaeda simply smiled and offered one to him. Although it was common for men, even young ones to smoke, cigars were mostly reserved for adults. Hinata was a tad nervous thinking about trying a cigar for the first time, since he just knew that his father would surely scold him for trying them, which in truth, actually added a bit more excitement than he would have expected. Or maybe that was the nervousness he felt for being alone with Komaeda in one room where they even nearly kissed and his heart was still fluttering in strange ways.

Komaeda wrapped his lips around the end of the cigar, and somehow Hinata felt envious of it. As Komaeda lighted his, Hinata looked at him with concern.

“Komaeda, is it alright for you to be smoking that, concerning your…?” Hinata was hesitant to continue, yet he looked on with interest, especially at those lips, when Komaeda took a drag.

Komaeda smiled, “We only get to live once, Hinata-kun. And there is no harm in trying.” As he said that, Hinata placed the other cigar in his mouth and motioned for Komaeda to give him the lighter.

“No need for the lighter. Here.” Komaeda gracefully scooted closer and securely held the cigar firmly with two fingers as he pressed the heads of the two cigars together and inhaled, flaming the other. While doing so, Komaeda’s eyes perked up and locked with Hinata’s, at close proximity. They were sharp, crisp and it seemed as if they were piercing right through his entire being. Komaeda’s gaze tugged at Hinata’s heart as he stared deep into his eyes. Hinata inhaled, helping to inflame his cigar while locking his gaze with Komaeda’s. It was as if they were sharing a kiss.

He really wondered if Komaeda was doing all this on purpose but he couldn’t tell. His stomach was building up with emotions and his chest felt tight. His hands tingled to hold him while his lips craved for Komaeda’s.

All his desires were put on hold when Hinata took a deep drag from the cigar,  the nicotine too strong on his untrained lungs that he went on a coughing fit. Komaeda had to laugh. However, annoyed at the embarrassing display, he tried again, slower this time but it was no use. Even he had to laugh at himself in between coughing fits. The taste was worse, bitter and it just left a bad taste in his mouth. The only thing warm about this experience was Komaeda’s soft laughter and, just like that, the previous tension was gone.

“I quit,” Hinata put it out on the ashtray and leaned back, sighing.

“Maybe you gave it up too soon, Hinata-kun?”

“It’s not worth it. I’m surprised you can take this well.”

“Oh? Maybe I got lucky.”

Hinata squinted his eyes in defiance, “That has nothing to do with luck, Komaeda.”

The sound of his chuckle was music to his ears. Every little thing Komaeda did leave him breathless. As Komaeda inhaled the smoke to his lungs and blew swiftly into the air, Hinata stared mesmerized, a little dazed at his beauty. He felt a little jealous too. Hinata quickly regretted upon ending the experience early and Komaeda noticed. “If it doesn’t bother you, Hinata-kun. You can have mine.”

“No, no, you don’t need to. I-...” Hinata stopped mid-sentence when he looked over at Komaeda with confusion. Instead of Komaeda offering him his cigar, he took a long deep drag from it. “Komaeda, what are you-…?” But before Hinata could continue his question, Komaeda pulled toward Hinata. Hinata’s breath hitched when Komaeda closed his eyes and pressed his lips to his.

Hinata froze in place, his heart banged loudly that his eardrums were hurting. Komaeda’s lips moved over his own, coaxing them to open and then he blew the smoke inside his mouth. Drinking in the smoke and Komaeda’s taste in a soft kiss, his head felt fuzzy for a moment.

When Komaeda pulled back, mere centimeters left between them, lips slipping from Hinata’s own, he stopped when he felt a grip on his wrist. Whether Komaeda was doing it on purpose or not, _it didn’t matter._ They stared at each other for a moment’s gaze, their hot breaths blending together amongst the smoke. As the cigar was burning close to its end, Hinata took it from Komaeda’s fingers and inhaled deep, threw it to the ashtray before holding Komaeda’s jaw.

Komaeda’s eyes squinted in a daze as Hinata pressed their mouths together, tasting the nicotine on Komaeda’s lips as well as his own taste, and through the kiss, he blew the smoke into his mouth. Hinata was so drugged on Komaeda’s intoxicating taste that he couldn’t manage to stop. A kiss after the other, the sounds of their wet mouths, their breathing. Komaeda’s lips tasted so heavenly and slowly the kiss deepened as they both melted into the other’s warmth. Hinata placed his hand behind Komaeda’s head, fingers diving into those soft locks, as he pressed their lips firmer together, unable to get enough of those lips.

Eventually realizing what he was doing. He opened his eyes and in that instant Komaeda opened his own eyes showing off a dazed look and Hinata gasped softly, breaking the kiss. When he saw those pale green eyes staring back at him, their lips still a mere inch away, Hinata’s lowered eyes breathed desire as he swam in the wonder of Komaeda’s beautiful eyes.

Suddenly, a knock on the door startled them both as they broke away from each other.

“Room service.”

The realization dawned on him belatedly of how he had been kissing Komaeda, and so intimately too. Hinata quickly got off the couch in a panic and for few seconds, no words found themselves on his lips as his heart went into a frenzy. “Oh God, Komaeda. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. I-I…” Hinata was having a hard time breathing.

Komaeda covered his lips with the back of his hand, hiding the blush that was surely forming and was kept behind the barrier of his hand, his eyes casted to the side. Hinata, however, immediately felt shame wash over him. He had just kissed another man and Komaeda probably must have felt appalled by that. He gripped his fists tight and apologized as he made his way out.

“Hinata-kun!” Komaeda called after him but Hinata was already heading out the door, startling the crew maid.

Komaeda’s gaze dropped in disappointment as Hinata left.

* * *

Hinata cursed repeatedly.

He was foolish to consider Komaeda meant to return his affections. He just couldn’t understand him at all. _Why did he kiss him first? Did he really mean to? Was he playing him?_

All this drove Hinata mad. He headed to his room and buried his face in the pillow. Trying to forget what happened he fell asleep. Rising up from the bottom of his subconscious, he has a lewd dream of him and Komaeda, as he makes love to him against the mattress with books surrounding the bed and smoke filling the room. As Komaeda moaned his name time and time again, Hinata’s brow furrowed because this reality was too far-fetched and unrealistic. The dream was short-lived as Hinata woke up with a start. Sweating and eyes panicking throughout the room.

It really was a dream.

Hinata sighed as he relaxed back in bed.

It was still daytime. Hinata was afraid to leave the quarters of his room that he decided staying in all day wouldn’t change anything.

“Hajime, you’re awake?”

Hinata looked over the door and found his mother standing there with a huge smile on face. “Yes, mother.”

“Oh, someone passed by earlier today asking for you.”

“Someone?”

“Hajime, you haven’t told me you have befriended an elite! Komaeda Nagito’s name, was it?”

Hinata’s face paled at the mentioning of his name. “Komaeda? H-He came here?”

“Oh, yes dear. He was worried about you but I told him you were tired and was taking a short nap. We’re about to head for lunch now so-”

“I’m not...really that hungry mother.”

“Oh, Hajime. Are you seasick? You haven’t been eating properly since you boarded the ship.”

Hinata wanted to blame a certain someone for that. He smiled courteously and told his mother he would join them later.

He then left the room.

* * *

To Hinata’s surprise, Komaeda greeted him first. Because of that brief lustful dream he had, he stuttered and avoided meeting Komaeda’s eyes at first.

Komaeda acted normally asking Hinata if he had a good sleep. When Hinata hesitantly turned his face to him, Komaeda mentioned that he passed by his room earlier but was told by his mother that he was sleeping. Hinata felt touched that Komaeda was concerned of his well-being after what he had done.

Hinata answered a little reluctantly at first but with Komaeda's easy going nature, Hinata found himself going with the flow soon enough.

Komaeda invited Hinata to join him for lunch and Hinata had a hard time saying yes. In that very moment, Hinata’s parents were heading to the dining room and his mother saw them.

“Hajime!” She called out excitedly.

“M-mother?”

She looked over the two and asked, “Will you two be having lunch now?”

Komaeda smiled and mentioned he has just asked Hinata to join him and Hinata started sweating. “Oh, how delightful. Of course, Hinata would love to join you.”

“But I-”

“Hajime, go and spend time with your new friend.”

What was she doing? Campaigning for their friendship because he was an elite?

While they seated and waited for their lunch after ordering, Hinata bent his head and apologized profusely, for both kissing him.. and for leaving all of a sudden.

"Don't let it bother you, Hinata-kun. It was just a kiss."

Hinata felt disappointed that Komaeda referred to it as ‘just a kiss’. Komaeda smiled still, trying to make the conversation flow normally, because, somehow, as he explained that he found himself liking Hinata's company and it would be too horrible to lose his company over something like a shared kiss.

Hinata felt the same. He didn’t want matters to be awkward between them because he too enjoyed Komaeda’s company. But when Komaeda saw the troubled look on Hinata’s face, Hinata felt shocked when it was Komaeda who apologized. “I’m sorry, Hinata-kun. I believe this was all due to my indiscretion and negligence.” He said that with a look that expressed guilt for the trouble of causing that awkwardness, yet he seemed incredibly happy for the attention he was given because of that shy smile that quickly turned to a sad, apologetic one. “Kissing me must have felt horrible. But that’s to be expected. I don’t blame you, Hinata-kun.”

“No, Komaeda, that’s _n-not_ -...” Hinata stopped when the waiter came with their plates.

“Your orders are ready, sir.”

Komaeda nodded at him and as the waiter left, he turned his bright smile to Hinata and said, “Let’s eat.” Hinata couldn’t possibly continue what he wanted to say. What would he say? _Kissing you wasn’t horrible at all? Would he have wanted to continue kissing?_ He couldn’t say such things! As Hinata looked down on his plate, he failed to notice the brief look of sadness on Komaeda’s face, worried that if Hinata knew he was falling for him, Hinata might get disgusted with him.

Hinata blushed when he saw his parents from the corners of his eyes rooting for him. He covered his face because of the embarrassment as Komaeda chuckled.

After lunch, they enjoyed time talking. Every second that passed, Hinata felt his craving for Komaeda increase, his charm, his voice, and the little things he's been noticing now since he's found out his attraction toward the guy. But Hinata kept on the pretense, continuously telling himself that Komaeda didn’t drive him crazy.

Their topic began to shift when Komaeda’s face sank into a solemn silence with a small melancholic smile. “After my parents died, I had no place to go to, and no one was willing to spend their time or efforts on me and of course I also understood why they wouldn’t. After all, spending their precious moments with trash like me would be such a waste. With a huge inheritance and no parents, nor siblings, nor any interested relatives, I realized how lonely life truly was. But even still, I was content.

But, that was until I learned of my diagnosis and knowing I only had a short time to live, I realized in the end, I’d rather not die alone…”

“Komaeda.”

Komaeda shrugged his shoulders and chuckled, “Haha, did I make you empathize with me? That would be the perfect backstory to a novel, wouldn’t it, Hinata-kun?"

“T-then that part about dying alone-...”

Komaeda excitedly beamed in Hinata’s face as he blurted out, cutting him off mid-sentence. “Wouldn’t it be exciting if we were to run away together, just you and me. We could start a new life, start an adventure! With no one else to bother us, I mean, trash like me would probably have some sort of value to offer. I’d give my best efforts to help you build something beautiful, Hinata-kun.”

_Build a life with Komaeda? That sounds like some sort of marriage proposal. But, was Komaeda trying to avoid the sentiments. He seemed as if he always hid behind that smile. Maybe what Komaeda was trying to say is that he wanted to be loved?_

Hinata’s eyes drew slightly narrower as he affectionately looked at Komaeda. Although it wasn’t his place to do such a thing, if Komaeda wanted to be loved, he wanted to be the one to give it to him if that were possible. _Build a life together, huh?_ If he didn’t know any better, it seemed like Komaeda too feared that when this ship cruise comes to an end, they might walk different paths.

If only he could draw closer to him right then, place his hand behind his neck and pull him into his arms and hold him. If not for anything else, if it was just meant to console him he would. But boys weren’t allowed to do that. But then again, if he were allowed to do more, he’d cup his cheek and place his lips on his in an affectionate kiss.

That would also be a good story for a novel except no one would actually read it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, this has been a long chapter.  
> Waiting to hear from you all. Leave a comment and I'll reply right away back to you. ^^
> 
> Which part you enjoyed the most?
> 
>  
> 
> Check Tumblr under the tags "my edit" or "my fic" to see my Komahina edits, and my Youtube for Komahina AMVs.  
> Tumblr: http://moonlessnight126.tumblr.com/  
> Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/moonlessnight126


	4. Jealousy and Sin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special thank you for my friend Mihori for helping me with this chapter. Her contributions are beautiful!
> 
> Enjoy~
> 
> Pixiv: 巧 [This is what the boys wore]  
> http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=manga_big&illust_id=43146350&page=4  
> Pixiv: Suta [This is what Chiaki wore]  
> http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=manga_big&illust_id=59589276&page=0  
> Pixiv: リカ [This is what Mikan wore to the ball]  
> http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=manga_big&illust_id=46147744&page=33

**Jealousy and Sin**

A ball was going to be held that night, reserved only for the elite children. According to those who organized this event, their aim was to get the elites together and have them get to know each other better, for the purpose of forming long-lasting connections. 

However, the only thing that would probably make Hinata look forward to the ball was to see Komaeda all dressed up in a sure-to-be handsome suit.

He didn’t try to deny his general admiration for the boy anymore. Despite the unique personalities of the other elites, Komaeda was different.

He didn’t know why, but he loved the details he kept noticing about him. His slightly tall stature, his long slim legs, the thin waist, his slightly broader chest, his wispy hair flowing beautifully above his shoulders; all making up his slender yet manly body. Reaching up to his face, his beautiful pale-green eyes, his sharp nose, the shape of his lips. He was too handsome, dare he say the word, but he wouldn’t dream of telling him so. No man should tell another that, nor should they notice such details to begin with. It was not that he was suddenly finding himself attracted to men. He knew he must have had crushes on women before but Komaeda… as mentioned earlier, was different.

Looking at the mirror while steadying his tie, he smiled and gave his reflection an encouraging nod.

His parents rooted for him as he made his way to the ball, and his mother didn't forget to remind him to mingle with the ladies, to which he reluctantly nodded to.

Upon entering the great dance hall, he was greeted with the promised children, all dressed in their finest suits and dresses. He could still remember how his mother had him memorize the names and statuses of all of the girls and boys of the elite to make conversations easy with them. Connections need to be made, after all. At least, that’s what his parents told him. Besides, having Komaeda talk about them so much and show such admiration had him further knowing more about them.

Speaking of Komaeda, his eyes automatically searched the room and soon found him in the corner, and his heart nudged at the very sight of him.

He was dressed in an elegant black suit, white shirt tucked behind a neat black vest along with an exquisite tie, leather gloves, right down to his lovely long legs ending with classic black shoes, his hair tied up with few bangs loose; all enough to take Hinata’s breath away.

In the two days he had known Komaeda, he knew he'd never pick something so lavish for himself but he also knew that such events would most likely oblige him to come dressed in a suitable attire that matched the occasion. And there he was, a handsome sight to bestow his eyes upon. Now, for him to deny that truth would just be absurd. Komaeda was undoubtedly handsome.

Looking around the room, he found Souda asking Sonia for a dance while Teruteru poked at him in mockery for being ignored as she made her way to Gundum who was talking with Togami. Nidai was practically having a food contest with Akane, while Koizumi was taking pictures, and hanging around with her was Ibuki. Peko, as usual, was standing along the Kuzuryuu siblings. And finally, there was Mikan shyly and timidly standing by the corner like a wallflower. Apparently, she had been scolded by Saionji and was drying her tears away at the moment. Maybe he should go talk to her? She stood close to where Komaeda was so it was convenient.

Making up his mind, he made his way across the room and, out of nowhere, bumped into someone by accident.

“Ah, I'm so sorry!” Hinata quickly apologized.

“Oh, it's alright, I usually forget to keep my eyes up while walking…uhm, I believe we haven't met before.”

Hinata's eyes widened as he set his eyes on the girl before him. She was beautiful and dressed in a lovely peachy dress that matched her hair, her waist tied in an elegant black bow. He must not have caught sight of her in previous gatherings before.

Hinata blushed at his late response and stammered, “I-I believe so too. My name is Hinata Hajime, and you must be…”

“Nanami Chiaki.”

 _Chiaki…_ she seemed cute.

Looking back at Komaeda and then to Nanami, he decided it was best to spend a bit of his time with someone other than Komaeda. Maybe if he did, he would prove to himself that his infatuation with Komaeda was, simply as the word implied, _just an infatuation_ and nothing more. Besides, he should mingle more with the rest of the elites.

Sharing drinks and even small talk with Nanami, he learned that her talent was her ability to invent all sorts of wild ideas for games. An elite in the entertainment business, a game inventor.

When he mentioned that he'd played some of the games she invented, she smiled all shy and happy, and somehow her personality made him feel comfortable enough to confide his concerns to, admittedly mentioning he was talentless, only an elite wannabe.

Expecting some sort of criticism afterwards, he was shocked when it never came. Instead, she quietly expressed that what mattered the most was being one's self. That he didn't need a talent. Her words consoled him and made him smile, somewhat relieved to hear her say that.

Soft music played and many of the elites were heading to the center of the ball for a dance. Gathering courage, Hinata got up to ask her for a dance and she shyly accepted.

Out of all the girls in the room, Hinata found Nanami to be the most charming and actually enjoyed her company to the extent that he wouldn’t mind spending the rest of the night with her. She was delightful and sweet, he thought, but somehow thinking of her in that way nudged him with a bit of a twinge in his heart. Namely, he presumed, because his mind was trying to find excuses.

Nanami and Hinata spent their time sometime later playing different forms of games, from using matchsticks to table napkins, but Hinata practically failed all of them. Nonetheless, they shared smiles and laughs, thinking to himself, and here he thought all the elite girls were too much for him but Nanami was not all that bad. He found that he can actually get along with her quite smoothly. If his mother were here, she'd definitely be cheering for him.

He sighed at the very thought and Nanami turned her head to him, “Do you find this game to be boring, Hinata-kun? We can play something else.”

“Haha, not at all. I'm actually feeling confident that I might have a chance at winning this thing.”

Nanami smiled.

Sitting so close on the table, with their shoulders touching almost intimately, Hinata couldn’t help but blush innocently especially when Nanami had leaned forward towards him showing just a bit of her chest. Hinata gulped and looked away quickly, trying hard not to be rude to her. However, he just couldn’t help but look. Especially when she laughed, and her soft shy blush would accent her so well. When she smiled, her soft and glossy lips would look so enticing and her warm eyes would glow and look so very welcoming. Everything she did just made him feel so nervous inside.

Thinking about Nanami and spending time with her, it made more sense that he should overlook his apparent ‘fancy’ towards a certain white-haired boy. Especially because it was inappropriate and unacceptable to have that sort of fascination towards another man to begin with. Besides, being with Nanami proved not to be bad either. If he could get closer to her, he might even fall in love. Maybe.

He paused and thought it over some more. This is probably for the best, for his own sake as well as for Komaeda’s.

Hinata calmly took the night to stride. However, he did catch himself checking Komaeda out of the corner of his eyes. Whenever he could get away with it, he would turn his head and watch him for probably the hundredth time that night.

Feeling hungry, the two head over the various colorful delicacies presented beautifully on tables by the walls. Hinata turned around just in time to see Nanami trip over herself when she had accidentally stepped on her dress. As she was about to fall, Hinata approached quickly and with one swift motion, caught her before she made contact to the ground. Nanami held onto him and blushed while Hinata's cheeks mirrored the same bright red.

“I’m sorry.” She shyly apologized.

“Don’t mention it.” He said quickly as he bashfully pulled his arms back from her waist.

A quick sense of deja vu hit Hinata, as he remembered the same particular incident with Komaeda. He willed the memories away as he joined Nanami to the table.

* * *

Across the room, keen pale-green eyes watched the whole ordeal, staring straight into the scene as he watched in wonder, thinking if perhaps Hinata has found a more fitting companion to associate with. If Hinata were to get closer to Nanami, it would undoubtedly bring about a more hopeful outcome than if he were to stay with him and lay his time in waste with someone so mundane, he thought.

Komaeda watched as Hinata conversed with her and how they looked to be having fun. Just when Komaeda was about to leave the room, he noticed another elite close to him who didn’t seem to have company. She kept to herself and looked incredibly nervous.

Komaeda was about to ignore her as well and proceed outside, but he was stopped from taking the first step out when the elite who had been nervously fidgeting at the corner earlier approached him.

“I'm, I'm sorry if I bothered you but...uhm…, is it alright i-if I stand here with you?” Mikan had said with a stammer.

Komaeda guessed that she probably found him to be the least intimidating out of the bunch. Nonetheless, he flashed out his welcoming smile, “Not at all. If you don’t mind spending your valuable time with trash like me, nothing could make me happier to stand along a beautiful and hopeful elite such as yourself.”

Mikan's face showered with shades of red and happy tears at the words.

* * *

It was when he noticed how Nanami seemed to have dozed off several times while playing that got Hinata to smile warmly at her before pulling his gaze from her to where Komaeda was again, out of simple curiosity of course, and his eyes widened when he saw how Mikan approached Komaeda nervously.

Hinata didn’t know why his heart skipped a beat, his surprise and fear suddenly overwhelming him. But why though? There was nothing wrong with Komaeda spending time with other elites. He was doing the same with Nanami. Shouldn’t he feel at ease that someone else was willing to spend time with Komaeda instead of being alone? But still, he couldn’t help but wonder out of curiosity.

_What were they talking about?_

Hinata become gradually perturbed and unsettled, agitated even, as he found himself keeping eye on their every move.

‘Calm down, Hajime. You’re with Chiaki, remember? Just… _ignore_ those two!’ he mentally scolded himself.

He tried his best to ignore them but seeing the two together, he suddenly felt downcast, like for some unexplainable reason he felt like Komaeda could easily slip away from him. He hasn’t thought about his leaving though, nor was he prepared for it. He felt an even stranger emotion wrap around his heart when he watched Komaeda offering his hand to Mikan for a dance.

Holding her close, they danced as Mikan smiled shyly at Komaeda and when he smiled back with exactly the same smile he usually gave Hinata, it bothered him to a great degree. Hinata shook his head hard, trying to dismiss the riled up emotions swirling, _burning,_  inside his chest.

_Burning stronger with every passing moment._

The more he watched, the more he drank, glass after the other, feeling the burn down to that strange ache in his chest.

It was incomprehensible! Seeing Komaeda dance with someone else disturbed him, to say the least. He didn’t like the feeling he got seeing them together. It was just so foolishly selfish of him. He disdainfully knew that yet he couldn’t help how he was feeling.

Hinata placed his hand on his chest, eyes perplexed in thought at putting a definition to what it was. Watching them, he gasped softly at the realization, eyes widening in little proportions.

_T-This... This disturbing feeling was…_

_It was…_ **_jealousy._**

_Jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, jealousy!_

Hinata snapped himself out of his thoughts with a slap on both cheeks, snatching his eyes away from the dancing couple. Angrily, he questioned himself; Why was he feeling jealous in the first place? He had no right. Besides, there was no prospect that he could actually hope to have him, or ever dream to. His desires were foolish enough to consider the possibility that he could have Komaeda in the first place! Yes, they shared few kisses but there could be nothing more. He shouldn’t dream of anything more because he could not have that sort of relationship with him. He wasn’t allowed to! It was unheard of, scornful even!

Hinata honestly tried to turn a blind eye to his feelings yet his eyes kept averting back to them.

Another glass, more burn.

As he watched the two dance, for a brief moment, his mind flashed an image of him dancing with Komaeda; his pale green eyes locked with his own with no one else surrounding them. Just them in the room, swaying to the music. Foreheads lean toward each other, crossing the dance floor in smooth steps and circular motions. Dipping him down, pulling him back up then holding him close. And ever so slowly, their lips close the distance for a-

_Wrong, wrong, wrong! No… stop._

A girl. It should be a girl. Her hair swaying as he twirled her around, her dress fluttering with the motion. Then, he would pull her into his arms and give her a chaste kiss on the lips like in many romantic classics he read growing up. But when Hinata opened his eyes to that girl, he only saw sharp eyes, black suit, Adam apple dancing with the laughter of a boy that was so beautiful, it made his heart skip a beat. His lovely voice echoing in his mind, saying his name in affection and warmth through an adoring smile, “Hinata-kun.”

Putting his glass down, Hinata inhaled a shaky breath and thickly swallowed the emotions bottling up in his throat.

Being with Nanami and avoiding Komaeda really proved to him one solid and undeniable truth.

Pulling up a shaky hand to cover his flustered face, he gritted his teeth in shame and contempt as he peered through the spaces of his fingers at Komaeda.

_I tried, I really tried. I’m sorry mother, father. I-I… I really do have feelings for him. I might have… f-fallen... in love with him!_

Upon waking up from her brief slumber, Nanami opened her sleepy eyes up and saw Hinata fixated on something with a strange expression on his face, so she called out in concern “Hinata-kun?”

Hinata gasped softly and looked over Nanami, his face pale and eyes trembling.

“Are you okay?” she said, tilting her head with worry evident in her eyes.

Hinata’s lips form a thin line, quivering slightly. With hesitance, he whispered, “I… don’t know.”

* * *

"S-s-sorry!”

Mikan kept apologizing as she repeatedly stepped on Komaeda's foot more than they could count but Komaeda did nothing but laugh warmly.

Leaning on her forehead, he said in his most charming voice, of how he didn’t mind being a stepping stone for her. Her cheeks flushed as she held onto him more firmly. He pressed his hand on her lower back and pulled her closer as he glided her around the room. Her hair swirled, covering the blush burning on her cheeks as she gazed at his warm smile. She smiled back as she moved her hand that was resting on his shoulder to move closer to cup the nook of his neck and pulled his face slightly closer, their lips barely apart.

As the music ended, Komaeda and Mikan pulled away from each other and retrieved back to their place. Suddenly, Mikan tripped, grabbing onto Komaeda, bumping and causing them to be pushed against the wall.

Wincing softly from the throb, Komaeda held onto her arms and asked in concern, “Are you okay?”

Mikan jerked her teary eyes up and apologized profusely. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry!”

Komaeda quickly smiled, “As long as you’re okay, there is nothing to worry about.”

Mikan smiled shyly but when she stepped back, noticing the patchwork of her dress had entangled around Komaeda's suit button, she gasped in dread.

“W-w-w-w-what s-should I d-do? My mother would s-scold me i-if I ruined this d-dress!”

As she panicked, Komaeda tried to give her a helping hand but his body suddenly trembled when Mikan accidentally grinded against him. She tried to free her dress without ruining it, all through her heavy sobbing and hysteria which made the task difficult.

“T-Tsumiki-san…”

Mikan pressed herself against Komaeda's chest because pulling back any further will tear the fabric. Her wobbling and trembling causing further grinding against a very sensitive part of him.

“Tsumiki-san, if y-you may please stop… _moving_?”

She wept and apologized some more, _pressing harder_ , causing Komaeda to throw his head back against the wall, giving light gasps.

Across the room, Hinata’s eyes were round as plates at the scene before him and jealousy burned at his heart hotter than iron on fire. He gripped on his fists, his heart trembling with dread at the sight.

Komaeda distracted her when he placed his hands on her cheeks to stop her from panicking. She broke through her hysteria and, just like that, Komaeda loosened the dress from his button. However, Mikan continued crying, and Komaeda comforted her by placing his fingers on her cheek, wiping the soft tears away. His kind words and genuine smile made her smile through her tears.

Leaning towards his touch, Mikan's voice dipped to a seductive tone, “As a reward for your kindness, maybe there is something I can do for you to return the favor.”

Offering herself and nudging her breasts against Komaeda's chest, she said, “I can do anything you ask for since you were so nice to me.”

She moved her fingers to dance in a suggestive manner on Komaeda's chest, while the other ran down his arm, entangling her fingers with his, insinuating what she meant.

Komaeda blinked, and he thinks he might have blushed as well at the notion. He felt so honored and moved that an elite would bequeath garbage like him with such an offer. However, he simply closed his eyes and smiled brightly at her, respectfully pulling her back. “There is no need. You've already paid me with your delightful company.”

Mikan blinked before her eyes got teary again. Wiping her tears away, she whispered a thank you before planting a soft chaste kiss on his cheek to show her appreciation.

The moment where her lips lingered, Komaeda stared in shock, mouth open and eyes wide.

* * *

Across the room, eyes trembled.

“...Hinata-kun?” Nanami tilted her head in confusion at the facial expression Hinata was giving. Her confusion rose when she followed his line of focus at the couple across the room, adding more question marks.

“Nanami-san, it was nice meeting you but… I have to go now.” Hinata’s voice was curt and calm. She nodded hesitantly. Hinata lifted his eyes toward her and gave a courteous smile before it quickly disappeared as he turned and headed for the couple across the room.

He charged in and pulled the two apart, not caring about who was watching. Mikan cowered in fear as Hinata pulled Komaeda away and stomped out of the hall, earning few gasps and stares.

* * *

When Hinata pulled him outside, Komaeda could do nothing but feel confused. He asked if there was anything Hinata wanted to tell him.

But Hinata was quiet. He even started wondering to himself as to why he did what he just did. Then, Hinata let go of his hand and apologized.

He felt so angry and jealous but it was wrong to take it out on Komaeda. He wanted to tell him how much it bothered him to see him with that girl, how jealous it made him feel, but he couldn’t. It wasn’t his place. He didn’t have any right.

Hinata must have drunk too many that his emotions were all over the place.

“It's... nothing. I'm sorry for dragging you out here. If you want to go back inside... it's fine.”

“Hinata-kun…”

Hinata didn’t know if Komaeda noticed his subtly trembling shoulders, gripping his fists because he couldn’t act upon his feelings.

Komaeda took one step toward Hinata and Hinata lifted his dejected gaze to meet his.

Komaeda tilted his head with what seemed like an affectionate look with a slight blush on his pale cheeks. A smile and eyes so warm that Hinata’s heart skipped a beat. Komaeda took one step closer and swiped his finger on Hinata’s lower lip, causing Hinata’s eyes to lock with his in shock. Komaeda slightly tilted his head in thought, slit eyes conveying wonder, but his lips pursed like he was undeserving.

“Goodnight, Hinata-kun.”

As Komaeda turned away, Hinata felt his heart panging so strongly, his throat becoming stiff, his mind screaming to hold onto his wrist and pull him back for a kiss.

But he just stood there, watching his figure walk away.

* * *

Hinata grabbed the door to his suite and threw it open harshly, untying the tie that suffocated him so much, breathing in hard as to try to contain himself; _contain his suppressed desires_. He hastily took off his suit jacket, a little in rage, a little in confusion, and even a little upset. He wanted him so damn much that it was becoming unbearable. He paced the room back and forth, tugging at his shirt angrily and throwing his tie across the room.

“Damn!” Hinata wasn't one to curse but he was reaching his limit. This anger was his own fault. If only he had just spent the night with him instead, he probably wouldn’t have felt so angry with himself. Maybe if he was brave enough to _actually confess_...

Confess what though? His _feelings_? But to whom really?! To another man?!

The biggest problem was he couldn’t confide to anyone. Even if he did, he knew what the answer would be.

_These feelings were wrong and he shouldn’t think of him that way._

Why _did_ he feel this way?

Hinata plopped down on the bed, covering his face with his hands, back lowered in defeat and heart filled with repressed desires, guilt and shame.

"I don't know what to do anymore..."

Because no matter how much he wanted to pull himself away from those feelings, they come back stronger.

Pressing his finger on his lower lip, cheeks burning softly, eyes drooped low in memory as he recalled Komaeda’s taste, just earlier that day when they briefly shared intimate kisses. After having a taste of those lips, how could he possibly continue on denying himself? How could he stand by and pretend Komaeda didn’t drive him all crazy inside, to fool himself into believing he could get over his infatuations.

The more he denied, the more he craved him.

“Komaeda...” His voice was shaky and breathless as he called out his name.

He didn't want just his company any longer, he wanted him wholeheartedly, to be _his_. Images filled his mind of him kissing Komaeda, undressing him, making love to him.

He recalled his own words earlier today; _I’d want to share the experience with someone dear to me, someone I love. It wouldn’t mean anything otherwise. At least, that’s what I believe._

He wanted to share _that_ experience with Komaeda. He wanted to make love to him.

Hinata clasped his heart, eyes wide in shock as the words spoke true of his feelings.

 _Hewantedhim, hewantedhim, hewantedhim, hewantedhim…_ **_He_**.. _!_

Hinata took a deep breath and whispered out loud, “ _I want him_ …”

Soft tears stung his eyes as he admitted it to himself out loud. He wanted to love him as a man loved a woman. He wanted their souls to connect and bodies to become one. He wanted to kiss him, _passionately_ , and with no remorse. To hold his slender body against his and shower it with love so Komaeda would learn to love himself.

As he lied down on bed with his clothes still on, the conflict tore at his consciousness.

_‘I’m such a fool, falling for him so easily.’_

Hinata then pressed a hand on his chest, feeling it beat like a hundred running horses. Thinking about Komaeda made his heart beat like crazy. He felt his cheeks warm up and he just knew that they were coloring beet crimson. With trembling eyes, he took a deep breath and tried to steady his rapid breathing through long inhales and exhales. Trying but obviously failing at calming his beating heart.

Just remembering his voice sent tingly emotions all throughout his body as he recalled every beautiful thing about him. Hinata swallowed hard as his beats got stronger and faster that he curled on bed and clutched his chest harder.

_Badum, Badum, Badum, Badum, Badum._

Hinata breathed hard, pulling on his legs. The feeling was so strong, it was unbearable. His eyes trembled at his strong emotions, shutting them tight as he tried to make sense of himself.

A hesitant hand reached down and sure enough, his palm rubbed over his tented bulge. Hinata let out a shivering breath as he palmed himself. He felt so ashamed and pursed his lips to stop his pleasured whimpering. His other hand clutched strongly over his heart as he buried his face into the pillow.

 _Komaeda… Komaeda_ …

His hand came to a dreadful halt as he heard the footsteps of his parents returning to their adjoined room. Upon thinking Hinata was sound asleep, they decided not to bother his slumber just to ask about what went through the ball earlier, thinking it better to ask the following day instead. As Hinata heard their whispered chattering, he grasped at the sheets angrily, his eyes stinging some more.

He just couldn't sleep.

After his parents tucked themselves in bed, he couldn’t hold it in any longer. Without waking his parents in the other room, he quietly headed out the door with one place in mind.

Komaeda’s room.

* * *

He didn't bother to check how late it was, he just wanted to see him.

He hoped Komaeda was still awake although he probably wasn't after a long and tiring day. With his hopes starting to burn out, the door opened, revealing Komaeda dressed still in only his formal pants and shirt, with just a few buttons loose.

“Hinata-kun?”

Hinata was honestly surprised he was still up and it made his heart flutter, feeling butterflies all over his stomach.

“Sorry to disturb you this late. C-can I… come in?”

Komaeda simply smiled and opened the door further for him.

Hinata walked in to find the lights dim and a bottle of wine opened. Komaeda brought another glass and poured some for Hinata. Hinata sat down on a chair in the middle of the room, next to it a fine long-legged table where Komaeda placed his glass on.

‘Did Komaeda usually spend late nights sipping liquor?' He thought.

Komaeda leaned back against the crimson wallpapered wall and held the glass elegantly in his hand. He tipped his head to the side and smiled, “May I ask what brings you here this late, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata wanted nothing more than to pour all of his bottled feelings out and to just find out what Komaeda felt about him. Was it the same or was it all in his head? Except he didn’t know how. He was just not able to keep the idea in his head and think it through.

The determination of coming to Komaeda’s room this late with his heart full of unsettled and dangerous emotions was most probably due to the drinks he had through the night, however, he knew he wasn’t drunk. The liquor felt like it was just only helping him in heightening his emotions to an unbearable degree that Hinata needed to get it off of his chest no matter the cost.

Hinata said quietly, “I wanted to talk to you.”

“Is it about Nanami Chiaki?”

Hinata's eyes widened at the mention of her name, to which Komaeda smiled with sly, insidious eyes. “She’s quite beautiful, isn’t she? I believe she could be a very suitable suitor for you.”

Hinata pursed his lips to bite down at them. Trying to stop the quivering of his lips, “Do you really think so?” Hinata’s tone turned swift and sharp, said under his breath.

Komaeda glanced at his glass as he swirled the wine around with a melancholic smile. "Well, I think she'll make a good wife, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata gripped his fists angrily. Was Komaeda making a fool out of him? Wasn't he phased at all? Did he not feel the same anger and jealousy that he was feeling? Was the kiss really just nothing to him, some meaningless activity they just so happened to share? These thoughts raged in his mind and for once he didn't want to see Komaeda's smile. He wanted him to show other emotions, possibly mirror the ones he was feeling!

“But so will Mikan, huh? I saw you two." Hinata bit out, trying to remain as calm as he could.

Komaeda's eyes brightened at the very mention of her name, namely because he talked and danced with an elite. He marveled at the opportunity, making Hinata's stomach churn because not only was he speaking so fondly of her, the girl was also something he was not.

Annoyance, anger, and jealousy, as well as disappointment in himself, fear and a sudden feeling of loss of belongingness engulfed his heart because he was not _worthy_ to be beside Komaeda. He was not the elite that Komaeda spoke so fondly of. The more he spoke about her, the more he gripped his fingers around the glass while his eyes fixated in dread and apprehension.

Emotions ruptured in his chest, ready to burst. He was at his peak, pent up, mentally and emotionally tired. He wanted Komaeda so damn much. That desire was so true and undeniable anymore that it ate out at his heart. If Komaeda were to fall for her, he wouldn’t know what to do.

Upon witnessing the anger on Hinata’s face, Komaeda tilted his head up playfully in wonder, “Ahh, perhaps you’re upset because she spent a bit of her precious time with trash like me?”

When Hinata didn’t say anything, Komaeda hummed in thought. “I understand why though. I am nothing but trash after all. Did you perhaps want to be with Tsumik-san earlier? But, obviously, you enjoyed your time more spending it with Nanami Chiaki. Isn’t that right, Hinata-kun?”

Guilt panged Hinata’s heart.

Komaeda’s observant eyes slitted further with that smile still plastered on his lips as he continued, “... you tempted her, right? Just like you did to me.”

Hinata choked, “W-what?”

“Haha, I’m just joking, Hinata-kun. You seemed rather anxious that I wanted to lighten up the mood a bit. But it is justifiable if you feel that way toward me.”

Hinata was quick to defend, “That’s not it!”

Komaeda looked at Hinata, fingers holding his chin in thought. “Then what is it, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata’s heart banged louder and louder with every passing second. He could hear his own heartbeat and feared Komaeda could too.

“She…” He took a moment to breathe and smiled rather nervously, “...seemed to enjoy her time with you. Perhaps, if she were to l-like you-...”

“Haha, but that would be absurd, Hinata-kun.”

“... Why is that?”

“Because an elite like her couldn't possibly carry any fondness for a low life like me. Because then she'd have really poor taste. Wouldn't you think that, Hinata-kun?”

Komaeda locked eyes with his and Hinata’s heart trembled at the notion that Komaeda might be riling him up, drawing him out. Was he insinuating at Hinata himself? He could never know. Komaeda was always ambiguous, always hard to read, and _so damn hard_ to figure out.

“I believe even she can become quite charming if you get to know her, Hinata-kun. The girls of the elite are all highly exceptional, don’t you think?”

“... What if I don’t want any of them, what if I want _you_?” The words barely slipped out of Hinata’s quivering lips in a suppressed angry whisper, before adding. “... hypothetically speaking.”

Komaeda stayed silent for a moment before his eyes turned melancholic and lips curved into a small smile, “I’m so blessed to hear you say that to me but… I’m not a girl, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata squeezed his eyes shut, gritted down at his teeth, lips quivering before yelling, “I _know_ that, Komaeda!”

Komaeda placed his glass down on the table next to him and said discouragingly, “I… must have upset you, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata trembled in defeat as Komaeda continued to play the part of the fool. Why didn’t Komaeda take the hint? He probably didn’t even consider the possibility of him and Hinata together although it was everything Hinata could think of.

"Aren't you even _thinking_ about the kiss we shared?" Hinata barely spit out loud, his eyes lowered down to his feet, knowing quite well that he was stepping into dangerous territories.

“Ahh you mean that kiss? Wasn't it something we did purely by chance and circumstance?” When Hinata didn't say anything, Komaeda paused before saying, “It didn't really mean anything to me, so don't let it worry you, Hinata-kun. I could even forget about it if you like.”

Hinata’s eyes stretched wide and hollowed with void. Everything else stopped making a sound.

A single bead of sweat trickled down his forehead, his breath repressed in his chest, eyes trembling. His hand gripped harder and harder as his words echoed in his mind.

Suddenly, the glass gripped in Hinata's hand shattered under the pressure, surprising Komaeda.

Being quick on his feet before Komaeda could utter a single a word, Hinata pushed the chair back with enough force that it fell backward and stomped toward Komaeda, pushing him against the wall with a strong grip on his shoulder. His eyes covered in the shadows of his lower bangs.

“... Hinata… kun?”

“I don’t understand you at all!” Hinata blurted out.

“Eh?”

“I said I don’t understand you at all, Komaeda!” Hinata took in a deep shaky breath before his grip on his shoulder got stronger.

"I don't understand why you belittle yourself so much and I don't understand why you think you're so undesirable that you'd even put down someone else who seems to like you and tell them they have poor taste!" He said in anger. "I especially don't understand why you would ever ever think that no one alive would ever come to like you when you're just so damn---"

Hinata stopped, realizing what he was about to say next and catching himself. He couldn't say it. He couldn't tell him.

_… That he was beautiful, exquisite, alluring and sensual, even seemingly innocent with his charms, unusual in the sweetest way possible, fascinating to the finest detail, yet… so out of reach._

Taking few deep breaths, Hinata’s voice shuddered., “You’re making a fool out of me, Komaeda.”

Komaeda stood there, staring in shock at Hinata's words. His eyes lost in trying to understand what Hinata meant. It was obvious that he didn’t really comprehend that someone might actually like him or more so, _love him._

Komaeda smiled rather weakly, “... That was never my intention. But it is expected that trash like me to have upset you. Nothing I ever do makes anyone happy. I am just garbage after all.”

“Stop.”

“I was always wondering too when you'd stop hanging out with me. When you'd realize trash like me is not worth your time." Komaeda paused. Hinata had his eyes lowered and so he couldn’t see the look on Komaeda’s face. Hinata didn't want him to see the face he was making.

Komaeda’s voice was sincere and apologetic, and Hinata didn’t know why Komaeda was apologizing in the first place!

"I’m… sorry. Trash like me... don't deserve anything anyone has to offer. You and I would be better off not meeting in the first place.”  He said in a calm voice as if it was merely the truth he was telling.

“I said stop!”

Hinata was trying so hard to keep himself together. His grip on Komaeda’s shoulder loosened as it trembled. The reality saddened him to know Komaeda saw himself as unworthy of anyone’s love. Always ready to blame himself for whatever reason without fully comprehending why, and self-blame came so easily to him.

“Hinata-kun…?” Komaeda halted in his breath when Hinata lifted his slightly glossy eyes that melted into one of guilt and yearning.

Komaeda could see the emotions burning in them, which added to his confusion all the more. Brows furrowing, the bewildered Komaeda slowly lifted his hand and tenderly caressed Hinata’s cheek, his eyes conveying confusion, hesitance, like he was looking at something perplexing, something he shouldn't have, shouldn’t consider wanting. But it was there, yet he couldn’t point out why Hinata was feeling so angry, so _emotional_. Why was Hinata close to shedding tears?

“I’m sorry, Hinata-kun.”

“Why are you apologizing?!” Hinata cried out in frustration.

The look that Komaeda gave him was all it took to shatter him. An expression that rocked Hinata’s heart with all kinds of emotions. He never wanted Komaeda to wear such a sad expression. Ever.

Without any second thoughts, Hinata buried his hand in Komaeda’s soft locks and pulled him close to his, lips barely a breath away. A soft gasp escaped from Komaeda’s lips, eyes widening and shaking from the shock.

Hinata’s strong gaze locked with Komaeda’s lonely ones and no trace of hesitance was left in his heart. No more guilt, no more remorse. With only a moment left to consider, Hinata couldn’t possibly deny him any longer.

Closing the distance, Hinata wrapped around Komaeda’s lips in a heated kiss; feverishly, longingly, desperately, and passionately.

After the initial shock, Hinata felt Komaeda melt into the kiss, returning his kisses with sudden fervor.

Their hands desperately holding, grasping, and clutching one another through vigorous, relentless kissing. Nothing could be heard but the sounds of their wet mouths lapping with the other, along with their haughty breathing; everything else melting into that very moment.

After a series of rough, desperate, mouth to mouth kisses, Hinata pulled back hard from his lips to stare into Komaeda’s eyes, his heart pounding at the notion that Komaeda was feeling the same way.

“Komaeda…” He breathed rousingly.

Komaeda breathed hotly against Hinata’s lips, swallowing, latching his hands around Hinata’s neck fervently. Then, Komaeda lifted those beautiful irises to connect with his in a mix of disbelief and wonder. “... Hinata-kun.”

Hinata leaned in again, sharing that moment's gaze with mesmerized eyes before pressing his lips together with his, this time slower, as his kiss meant to savor.

The feel of Komaeda’s lips were a different sensation all on their own. Along with the slight shivering of his body under his touch as Hinata glided his hands down his sides, and Komaeda's faint moans between sweet savoring kisses, everything made his heartthrob.

Komaeda cupped Hinata’s face to deepen the kiss and Hinata swore he was high up in the heavens.

Hinata saved every breath, every moan, and every shudder into memory. He broke the kiss with a loud wet pop and stared into Komaeda’s eyes, wanting to make sure this wasn't a dream as he wrapped his arms around his figure, holding him close.

Komaeda’s flush contrasted heavily with his pale cheeks, eyes drooped down into heavy hazy slits. He whispered against his lips, “ Hinata-kun… ” as he caressed Hinata's cheek with seeming affection, “... _we shouldn’t._ ”

Hinata swallowed hard as fear crept in. _“_ But you want us to _, don’t you?”_ Hinata whispered those last two words, wanting to feel assurance from his respectful other.

When Hinata pressed his body against his in question, Komaeda pulled his eyes away and squeezed them shut as he felt an undeniable blush spread across to his cheeks and up to his ears.

Lips quivered bashfully with a tint of dejection, “Trash like me just doesn’t deserve your kind attention, Hinata-kun. I think that once you stay with me long enough, you’ll finally realize just how much of a garbage I really am.”

“That’s not true.” Hinata found himself saying quickly and breathlessly.

“Hinata-kun, you can’t honestly mean that.”

“Because it’s so hard to believe someone can truly hold any kind of affection for you?”

Hinata could see Komaeda was having a hard time believing his words because he stayed silent, lips pressed into a thin line. Hinata knew he was asking for so much. Mirroring the same flush tainting those pale cheeks, Hinata traced the contours of his face with his thumb.

He could see that Komaeda wanted to deny himself the pleasure of the moment, that Hinata deserved better. However, Hinata wanted nothing more than to show him his worth, and how much Komaeda, and no one else, affected him.

_To make Komaeda believe someone can truly love him._

Even when all thoughts alarmed Hinata of his status’s vanity, his parents, and common sense stand as a reason to pull away, Komaeda’s breathy voice called his name with a look of desire that only pushed Hinata towards one thing. _He wanted Komaeda wholeheartedly_.

Hinata found his lips latched with Komaeda’s again and again in a heated burst of passion, and he couldn’t stop even if he wanted to. And he didn’t.

Neither did Komaeda.

No matter how much the alarms tried to alert him in his head, he couldn’t stop. All of Hinata's feelings were pouring out. Never had he felt such feelings toward a man before, toward _anyone_ before.

He dragged his eager mouth to the nook of Komaeda’s neck and pressed his lips there on sensitive skin, feeling his pulse against his lips, he noted how thin his neck was.

Even with few buttons loose, it didn't give him much. Hinata started to unbutton just enough to plant kisses all over his shoulder to his collarbone, his ears relishing in the small soft gasps escaping Komaeda's mouth.

He smelled so nice.

He just wanted to touch him more.

Hinata tucked his left hand under the loosened shirt and felt his smooth skin against his palm, felt his stomach tighten.

Komaeda was so sensitive to the touch. His lips quivered with sinful whispers of his name while he grabbed Hinata's shirt by the back.

His skin was so soft against his lips that Hinata buried himself further in his neck, placing soft kisses everywhere his lips touched.

His skin was so soft, so smooth. He wanted to kiss every part of his smooth body. With that thought in mind, he couldn't help dragging his tongue across that smooth skin, eliciting a shiver from Komaeda.

Komaeda pursed his lips to hold the moans while Hinata nipped and sucked lightly on skin.

“Hi… Hinata-kun.” Komaeda bashfully cried out with a shudder.

Hinata was so drowned in the moment that he accidentally pressed his knee between Komaeda's legs. Hinata's eyes snapped open when he felt his bulge against him.

In that fit of passion, Hinata found himself pressing the palm of his hand flatly against him; the very thing that defined him as a man. With a sudden gasp, Komaeda shuddered, hitting his head back against the wall. Hinata’s heart hammered hard in that moment, pressing further and _feeling_ him.

Filling his palm, feeling its curves, its contour against his hand...  It was a strange sensation that only roused him with a need to unravel more. _Groping another man_ … never had he imagined to feel one other than his own. And to hear such sinful vocalizations escaping the lips of that man, it filled him with a carnal desire to bear himself completely and love him, claim his body like he claimed his heart.

However, Hinata worried that he may be crossing his boundaries, so he pulled his lips up toward Komaeda’s ear and whispered hotly against it, “Forgive me, Komaeda.”

“What... f-for?” Komaeda rasped between breaths.

_If it’s a sin to love you, I’ll carry the sin and love you altogether._

Hinata lifted his pleading eyes and breathed across Komaeda’s lips in response, “... for _wanting_ you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for stopping here guys, chapter was getting too long. :D
> 
> Which parts did you enjoy best? Share your thoughts with me.  
> I’d love to hear all about it.
> 
> P.S: Would some of you prefer I make a version of this story without the explicit scenes?
> 
> Check Tumblr under the tags "my edit" or "my fic" to see my Komahina edits, and my Youtube for Komahina AMVs.  
> Tumblr: http://moonlessnight126.tumblr.com/  
> Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/moonlessnight126


	5. Intimacy and Passion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! As you can see, this is the longest chapter yet and most tedious with details and smex. Forgive me for any mistakes and enjoy the chapter.
> 
> Comments ARE hugely appreciated! Especially the long detailed ones. <3

**Warning: Explicit and detailed sexual content,** **really visual. Don** **'t say I didn't warn you. Read at your own free will. I need your full reactions on this in the comment section.**

_If I am allowed to, will you let me love you? It doesn't concern me that you're a man, that you don't see yourself worthy, that you don't see your own beauty. I see it all, and I want to become part of you._

_-_

**Intimacy and Passion**

Komaeda’s eyes grew wide and his breath caught in his throat as the shock from what he had heard from Hinata reach him. His mouth went dry as he struggled to reply.

Hinata though, didn’t know what to make of that reaction as his own heart pounded loud and hard in his chest.

Seconds felt like centuries and Hinata stood there, unmoving, his hands resting on Komaeda’s slender waist. Lips barely a breath apart as their eyes looked deep within one another.

Hinata could feel his throat tighten and somehow swallowing was made more difficult. Even the simple but tedious process of breathing had become rather difficult. His heart throbbed painfully as he waited. His chest ready to burst from nervousness and anxiety.

“You want _me_?” Komaeda uttered, in a barely concealed whisper. He looked genuinely surprised and his voice was laced with doubt and disbelief.

Because of how painfully his heart was throbbing, Hinata just knew that if he were to say it a second time, his chest would just suddenly burst open.

With a simple nod, both of them blushed harder when Hinata held Komaeda closer to _feel_ him as an answer. Realization of what was heavily implied slowly settled between them as pleading eyes were locked with Komaeda’s in yearning.

Komaeda drew in a slow breath, his eyes trembling, and bony calloused fingers stroked the back of Hinata's neck in tender caresses while his lips were drawn with hesitance against Hinata's.

The lust was undeniable. Yet, Hinata could see it in his eyes; his confusion.

Breaking eye contact, Komaeda turned his head, sliding his hands away from his neck.

Hinata’s heart sank, his eyes shaken in lamentation as he pulled himself back. “Komaeda...? D-Do you... _not…_?” Hinata swallowed hard as his lips trembled, “... f-feel the same?”

When Komaeda didn't give him an answer, guilt and shame washed over Hinata. Putting some distance between them, it was getting harder to breathe as Hinata's throat clamped, “I-I’m.. sorry… coming at you like that. _I-I_...”

Hinata took a step back as his face heated with utter embarrassment and his glistened eyes trembled in perturbation. He felt utterly frustrated with himself; feeling denied, rejected, and fooled into believing Komaeda shared the same sentiments. Did he somehow misunderstand? Was he actually just trying to find a cause, any cause, or justification so he can be with Komaeda?

One thing was for sure though, Hinata had never felt so humiliated.

_‘Maybe he feels disgusted with me now? Having this thing between the two of us, between two men, it's wrong, isn't it? I should have known. This is all a big mistake!’_

Knowing he was about to embarrass himself further when his eyes drew tears, Hinata turned to leave, but Komaeda stopped him with a firm grip on his wrist.

Surprised, Hinata turned his head back.

After a moment of silence, Komaeda carried Hinata's hand to cup his own face and leaned gently towards it, closing his eyes as he felt its warmth. Barely opening his eyelids, the glow in his eyes danced as he whispered, “...It really makes me happy, Hinata-kun. So happy that I feel... it's not real.”

Hinata's heart fluttered as he wrapped himself in Komaeda's arms, his thumb brushing against his soft pale cheek in gentle caresses as he leaned towards his lips. Hinata swallowed the lump that had built up in his throat. He could hardly hide his trembling smile as he couldn't believe his ears. He felt like he was dreaming.

“I feel the same way, Komaeda.” Hinata breathed gently as he looked deep into his pale-green eyes, and Komaeda did the same; searching for answers to questions that they probably wouldn’t be able to find an answer to on their own.

Komaeda brought his hands to cup Hinata's cheeks and caressed them softly with his thumbs.

Hinata's voice shivered as he breathed, “It's real, Komaeda. How I feel about you, it's all real.”

Komaeda eyes trembled, carrying doubt before casting them aside again. Surprised, he returned his gaze back to him when Hinata grabbed hold of his hand and placed it on his chest. “Can you feel it? My heart.”

Komaeda's eyes squinted with a blush spreading across his cheeks as he felt the strong heartbeats.

“... Hinata-kun.”

Hinata drew closer and whispered, “What does it tell you, Komaeda?”

Hinata could feel the warm and serene ambiance emanating from Komaeda's lowered eyes, conveying wonder and desire that draws Hinata into his world, deeper into his eyes, closer to his lips.

Hinata brushed his lips against his and Komaeda sighed through his nose, kissing him back. Lips moved slow and gentle against one another as Hinata wrapped his arms around him while Komaeda wrapped his own around Hinata's neck.

Bare and conscientious emotions tied them together, like vines wrapped around them and pulling them to one another, overlooking limitations and gender. An unexplainable allure that ties a thread around their hearts, wrapping around their bodies and bringing them together to become as one, transcending the world around them to a beautiful serene place. Hinata didn't know why he felt that way as he kissed Komaeda; why his heart throbbed so dearly for him.

Komaeda pulled on Hinata's head and buried his hand in his hair, deepening the kiss. Slipping his lips from Hinata's, he leaned his forehead against his and exhaled a shivered breath.

Hinata opened his eyes and his brows furrowed when he saw Komaeda’s troubled eyes.

“Komaeda...?”

“I don't understand it, Hinata-kun. Wanting trash like me...” Komaeda casted his eyes down in lonesome sadness once again, “I don't see the value of us engaging together. There is no meaning for it. There is no hope to bear fruit from. I don't deserve such sentiments.”

Hinata pulled his chin gently and pressed his lips to his. He smiled as he asked, “Is that the only matter that concerns you, Komaeda?” Chuckling softly, he found it funny how nothing else seemed to unnerve Komaeda. It probably didn't even concern him that they were both men.

“I don’t understand it either, Komaeda. _This_ … what I'm feeling, I can't really find the words to explain it. But, ever since that moment we've met, I've started to feel different. I wanted to get closer to you but couldn't understand why. The more time I spent with you, the happier I've become, the stronger my feelings grew.”

Holding Komaeda's hand and placing it on his heart once again, his hand on top of his, he said, “You talk about no hope to give when you’re the one who has given me hope for a future that serves as my own. I grow curious more and more each day to see the world through your eyes.” Eyes softening devotedly, Hinata's smile grew warmer as he said, “I found my hope with you, Komaeda.”

Hinata blushed harder as he felt his heartbeat quicken.

Komaeda found it harder to breathe, shuddering, as his voice turned a bit unstable when he whispered Hinata's name. He bit down on his trembling lips as his eyes dilated and slightly became unfocused.

“Komaeda,” Hinata whispered warmly, “You feel confused just as I am, don’t you?” Hinata breathed with emotion against his lips. Pale-green eyes locked with his as their lips danced in feathery caressing touches.

“Hinata-kun.” Komaeda’s eyes foretold hidden desires as he caressed Hinata's cheek.

They closed in on one another as they wrapped their lips around each other again and again, drowning them further into each other.

Taking a moment, they placed their foreheads against each other as they tried to make sense of their emotions. Hands gripped on one another as their warm breaths caressed each other's lips. Eyes lidded heavily with need, drawing them to one another.

Hinata looked deep into Komaeda’s eyes and his voice shivered as he squeezed Komaeda’s hand that rests on his heart, “I want you, Komaeda. More than anything. I want you no less than when I first realized I really wanted to have you.”

After a few shaky breaths, Komaeda found his voice as he locked eyes with Hinata’s in yearning and said in an earnest whisper, “I'll gladly give myself to you, Hinata-kun.”

Heart throbbing in disbelief, Hinata’s breath shuddered at hearing the words; like everything was but a sweet dream that's too good to be true. Komaeda wanted him just as much as Hinata did.

Their lips found each other again, pressed hard against one another with urgency.

Hinata roamed his hands over his frail body, touching where he dreamed of touching and felt the touch as real as the kisses they shared. As their breaths grew warm and heavy after every kiss, one desire crossed Hinata's mind. He wanted to feel Komaeda's bare body against his.

In a spur of passion, Hinata tugged on Komaeda’s shirt that was tucked under his pants, which made Komaeda pull away quickly from his lips and Hinata is left staring at him, wondering if had done something to have upset Komaeda.

“Komaeda?” Hinata anxiously looked at him.

Komaeda had his face turned away as a heavy blush settled on his pale cheeks.“You might not like what you see, Hinata-kun.” Komaeda said as he clutched at his own shirt.

Hinata’s eyes furrowed as he thought about what Komaeda had just said. Then it dawned on him that Komaeda might be talking about his own body. Komaeda was self-conscious about himself and it spoke to reason that he felt that way towards his body. But Hinata already admired him plenty and nothing could ever deter him from feeling otherwise.

If anything, it was Hinata who felt self-conscious. “That is far from the truth, Komaeda.” Holding him tighter, Hinata breathed the words to him, “Isn't me being here now a proof of that?”

Hinata pressed his clothed bulge against Komaeda's, drawing a breathless gasp from his lips.

“I just want to be with you, and this feeling grows stronger inside of me. But… it won't mean anything unless you feel the same.” Hinata whispered to him. “You feel the same way, don’t you? ...A-About me.” Hinata blushed as he said the words.

Komaeda closed his eyes and took a moment. Then, he placed his hand on Hinata’s lower back, pulling him and pressing both their manhoods together. Opening his eyes slowly, they grew from the former hesitance to ones that sent Hinata shivers; the same ones that have pierced through him time and time again when Komaeda would suggestively say or do something that would rile Hinata up. Thinking back on it, he secretly wondered if Komaeda had done all that on purpose.

Komaeda dipped his head to the side with warmth filling his eyes and lips formed into a smile, “I believe I feel the same way, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata smiled with a soft gasp and his eyes danced with joy before they warmly softened.

They drew closer before their lips closed onto one another. Slowly, they started moving their lower bodies, rubbing their hard-ons against one another in circles.

Hinata huffed at the sweet friction and locked eyes with Komaeda's as they shared gazes with one another while they moved their bodies.

Hinata unleashed everything, bearing himself in the arms of this man, pressing harder against him. Lust took over and mouths fell open in frantic gasps as they rubbed harder, relishing in the sweet friction. Hinata grabbed Komaeda's waist as he humped him against the wall. Komaeda exhaled sharply with each thrust, his frantic and breathless moaning between feverish kisses drove Hinata wild.

“Ahh! Ah...mnhh... H-Hinata-kun.”

Hinata drowned in the warmth of Komaeda's mouth as he slid his hands and lightly groped his buttocks.

Komaeda gasped as his legs lightly gave away. He pulled back from the kiss and stared into Hinata’s eyes. With a smile, he ran his hand down Hinata’s chest until he was just inches away from his bulge before saying, “Hinata-kun, let’s get more comfortable...”  

Komaeda’s hot breath ran across his lips and goosebumps rose on Hinata's skin, his heart pounding harder at the notion. Hinata felt his cheeks burn before nodding.

Komaeda plopped down on the soft mattress, climbing backward towards the pillow and Hinata followed, crawling between his legs and hovering over him.

Komaeda held his neck affectionately before pulling Hinata to his lips once again. Their mouths pulled and sucked while their breathing grew heavy with every passing second.

Pulling back, Hinata gazed down at the beautiful boy whose soft white locks scattered across the crimson pillow, a soft blush peppered on his pale cheeks, his loosened shirt baring smooth skin and his eyes lowered with prominent desire.

What a beautiful sight he was. Beautiful than anything he had ever seen. Just like his dreams, _no_ … it was like nothing could possibly compare.

Hinata savored the sight, reminding himself it was not a dream. It was all very real, Komaeda’s wanting eyes and inviting smile were real.

‘ _This is not a dream_ …’ He thought over and over again as his chest drew deep breaths, feeling nervous and excited like never before. He took a moment to steady the throb in his heart, the raw emotions threatening to burst.

It was such an exhilarating feeling as blood rushed to his throbbing bulge.

Hinata pressed his lower body down against Komaeda’s, eliciting a beautiful reaction.

Komaeda threw his head back against the pillow at Hinata’s fullness and rubbed back with the same eagerness.

No matter how distraught people might get or how disgusted they might feel or how horrified his parents would be, Hinata wanted to continue pleasuring this man. He never desired anyone else as much as he desired him.

Hinata couldn’t comprehend as to why his emotions felt that strong. These burning emotions fueled fire throughout his body and it throbbed painfully in a way that felt so good. He never imagined loving another would feel this way. Komaeda had made a mess of him.

“Komaeda,” Hinata whispered hoarsely.

Komaeda bit down seductively on his lips, muttering Hinata’s name across his lips in caressing whispers over and over.

A soft moan escaped Komaeda’s lips right before Hinata kissed him feverishly. He wanted to render Komaeda into one huge mess, the same way he rendered him to the man he was at that very moment. A man who has fallen head over heels for him.

Hinata licked the contours of his thin lips, making Komaeda open his mouth. Hinata took it as an invitation to explore further and pushed his tongue past his thin lips. The touch between their tongues instantly sparked fire within Hinata. When Komaeda pushed his tongue out, Hinata’s tongue eagerly joined his as their tongues swirled around.

The feel of Komaeda's tongue against his own filled him with many fiery sensations.

Leaning on his two elbows on each side of Komaeda's head, Hinata continued to passionately kiss him as their tongues twirled inside Komaeda’s mouth.

Burying further, drawing their cheeks back in wrinkles, their tongues pressed and swirled and Hinata couldn't get enough of his taste. His ears relished in the sounds getting muffled with a mouthful of their tongues. They pressed their mouths harder against each other in an attempt to devour each other. It felt like their whole beings would cease to exist if they did otherwise.

Yet, Hinata had to pull back because his lungs were not getting enough air. He then resumed frotting against him just to listen to the soft sounds of pleasure coming out of those thin flushed lips.

Driven crazy with lust, Hinata couldn’t help but groan against Komaeda’s open mouth. The friction and heat became unbearable and his bulge was getting painstakingly tight in his pants.

Hinata buried his face onto Komaeda’s shoulder, breathing in his scent, while his hand ducked under his disheveled shirt and felt his fair skin; that surprisingly soft and beautiful skin.

Komaeda shivered involuntarily the further Hinata’s hand reached up. Hinata’s name always on his lips, whispered with much-heated affection.

The simple rise and fall of Komaeda’s chest roused Hinata even more. Running his hand over his skin, Hinata felt the contours of his ribs and he was reminded again of Komaeda’s illness. His heart throbbed with pain but he tried to focus on the present at hand.

Komaeda sucked in a breath when Hinata's traced his nipples with his fingertips and pressed his middle finger against it. Komaeda pursed his lip and moaned quietly as Hinata’s finger rolled the bud around and around.

‘What beautiful voice he’s making’, Hinata thought. He then pulled his hand back and started unbuttoning the rest of Komaeda’s shirt.

Komaeda closed his eyes and buried the side of his face onto the pillow, lewdly pushing his chest towards him. Pulling the shirt open but not fully taking it off, Hinata gazed upon his torso; pink nipples flushed against pale skin, body so frail that skin wrapped lightly around his ribs, sunken stomach pumping softly with quick paced breathing.

Komaeda shyly pressed his flushed face against the pillow, hiding away from Hinata’s observing gaze.

Nothing could have roused Hinata more as he stared at Komaeda's smooth lean chest.

Without another moment to spare, Hinata dipped his lips down and lovingly planted long lush kisses down his chest, lips lingering on his skin with loving affection.

Komaeda whimpered softly, his stomach tightened from the sensitivity.

Hinata tilted his head curiously as he looked over one hard bud and planted a soft kiss on it.

Komaeda flinched in surprise, making a small sound and Hinata knew right away that he liked it.

He kissed it again, feeling it press hard against his lips. It was so small and cute that he drew out his tongue and licked it. Although it was so small, he still felt its fullness against his tongue as he softly nibbled at it.

With a shivery gasp, Komaeda’s former quiet moans rang a tad louder through the room.

Feeling encouraged, Hinata wrapped his lips around the nipple and devoured it in his mouth. The bud was so small that he had to suck and pull on it again and again to get a hold of it, and all these drove Komaeda to a gasping and shuddering mess. Hinata loved the moans elicited from those lips so he brought his other hand to press and tweak the other.

Komaeda moaned feverishly as he arched his back against that mouth.

“Ngghhh...H-... _Hinata_...” Komaeda’s voice melted into a pleading mewl, losing complete sense of the words. He shut his eyes and buried half of his face onto the pillow, allowing Hinata to do whatever he wanted with his body.

‘He’s very sensitive’, Hinata thought. Every touch made Komaeda shiver.

Hinata pulled away from the drenched nipple, amazed by how flushed it had become. Komaeda heaved with a sigh, a moment to try and calm himself, but then he sucked in a breath when Hinata brought his lips to the other bud.

Upon feeling Hinata’s lips wrap around his other nipple, Komaeda let out a whiney moan. It was the first time Hinata heard a man moan in such a manner or anyone else for that matter. And it was so damn arousing. He wanted to push Komaeda more to the edge.

He sucked and pushed his tongue over it, licking it before biting down lightly with his teeth to get a hold of it and pulled, causing Komaeda’s back to arch along.

Komaeda's shameless moan echoed in the room before he plopped back down, surprising Hinata.

Hinata watched him with full-blown wonder and awe as Komaeda hid his face behind his hand.

Looking at his chest, he saw his swollen nipples glistening softly against the dim light of the room. Hinata couldn't help but feel his heart hammer in his chest. Komaeda was breathtaking in every sense of the word.

Reaching over to Komaeda’s lips, Komaeda too eagerly lifted his own, meeting halfway, their lips already longing for each other.

Komaeda pulled on Hinata’s shirt between desperate kisses, tugging at it with urgency.

They momentarily broke the kiss as Hinata hastily took his shirt off and Komaeda did the same with his unbuttoned one. Hinata pulled back to gaze at him for one fleeting moment before he melted down on his lips again, their chests gently rubbing one another.

When Hinata pulled back, Komaeda breathed hard as he gazed up at the slender yet firm and strong chest in apparent admiration. He reached up and slid his hands down his torso, sending shivers throughout Hinata's body from the cold touch of his fingertips.

They gazed into each other's eyes for God knows how long until Hinata breathed “I want you, Komaeda.”

“Do you really feel that way, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata gave a small chuckle, “After coming this far, you're still asking me that?”

Komaeda pulled his lips to a thin line before he said, “I still fear that my bad luck will overturn this moment and take everything away from me. I’m fortunate enough just having you here, Hinata-kun. So fortunate that I don’t care what bad luck happens later. Not even if I die.”

Hinata pressed their foreheads together, his facial expression made Komaeda tilt his head in confusion as he asked with apparent innocence. “Hinata-kun?”

_Why would Komaeda say such a thing so easily?_

“Komaeda,” he breathed sensually. “I want to hear it from your own lips.”

Komaeda dipped his head playfully to the side with a small smile, “Hear what, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata's voice melted to a husky tone as he pushed his girth against his, “Do you want me too?”

Komaeda simply stared into his eyes.

“I need to hear it, Komaeda.” Hinata pleaded breathlessly.

Komaeda simply smiled as his long and calloused fingers slid across Hinata’s chest. “I do, Hinata-kun.”

Traveling further down, Komaeda groped him and gave a small warm chuckle when Hinata gasped before pushing against his hand. Komaeda dipped his hand inside his undergarment and Hinata hissed as he felt the cold fingers wrap around him.

Hinata grunted softly as Komaeda pumped him. “ _Komaeda…_ ”

Komaeda drew in a shivery breath before he pushed Hinata onto his back and climbed over, straddling him. With a playful smile playing on his lips, eyes locked on Hinata’s heavy girth before lowering himself.

Hinata’s breath hitched in surprise as Komaeda pressed his lips over the clothed bulge, teasing him with what’s to come.

“A-Ahh!” Hinata shuddered bashfully.

Komaeda popped the button open. A slow unzipping soon followed as Hinata’s cock curved out and pressed up against the fabric that was virtuously covering what was underneath.

Komaeda gave a small courteous smile before he pressed his lips to Hinata’s girth with a kiss.

Hinata's face turned to different shades of red, even more, when he felt himself stain the front of his undergarment. Komaeda smiled again and planted a kiss on the veiled head.

“K-Komaeda.”

“Hinata-kun, you’re really excited, aren’t you?”

“Don’t say that.” Hinata said bashfully.

Pulling the garment down just enough through the open flyer, Komaeda watched as the cock that was pressed down tightly spring up before his eyes.

Hinata hid his face in embarrassment, feeling self-conscious at being shown bare right before his eyes. Komaeda’s curious gaze upon his cock made his face burn more shades of red and his cock twitched.

Komaeda gave out a shivery breath, bearing an excited smile as he wrapped his hand around Hinata’s cock and gazed upon it in apparent admiration. His breaths turned uneven as his body shivered with delight.

Hinata didn't know what to make of such an expression, so he closed his eyes and relished in the feeling instead, trying to ignore his embarrassment.

Komaeda's calloused cold fingers against his flushed heat gave him a lovely sensual feeling. He tried to hold his little moans in as Komaeda started moving his hand.

Komaeda tilted his head with a smile stretched wide, eyes gazing on the round mushroom head as he watched the ooze squeezed out of the slit.

Hinata took a peek at him and blushed. “K-Komaeda... don't stare.”

“Why not, Hinata-kun? It's amazing how much is coming out.”

“T-That's why. And don't say that. It's embarrassing.” He said as he pulled himself up onto his elbows.

Komaeda smiled with delight and licked his lips as he breathed hotly, “ _Ne_ , Hinata-kun. Do you want me to lick you?”

Hinata's eyes snapped open as he sucked in a breath. “Y-You mean..”

When Komaeda nodded, a blush reached down to Hinata's neck and felt the heat come out of his ears.

“Like this.” Komaeda playfully gave a cheeky grin as he kept his gaze locked with Hinata’s when he darted his tongue out and flicked it across the tip of Hinata’s cock, swiping the languid blob between the slit and then swallowed it down his throat.

Hinata gulped hard and his eyes stretched approximately wide when Komaeda continued, giving experimental licks, and then a long drag across his length, finally ending up with swirling his tongue over the head.

Hinata dropped down against the pillow, clutching the bed sheets tight as his face burned hard. His cock twitching in Komaeda's hand as he felt tingles of electric pleasure course through him.

Komaeda couldn't hide the delighted smile forming on his lips. Planting soft kisses and caressing the tip of his nose along its length while holding his cock affectionately, Komaeda breathed in his musky scent as he pressed it across his face with a smile still playing on his lips. Hinata’s cheeks burned hotter when he felt that warm wet tongue glide over his heated flesh.

It felt _so_ good! But he wasn’t used to that sort of pleasure.

Bashfully closing in on the boy between his legs, Hinata's hips trembled as he struggled to get a hold of them. Komaeda pulled Hinata’s legs further apart until the open zipper stretched to its limit, and he snuggled closer to Hinata’s cock for a more comfortable posture.

There was a glint dancing in Komaeda's eyes as leaned down and gave another lap of his tongue across the sensitive tip, which caused Hinata to writhe.

Komaeda became more emboldened as he rolled his tongue over the flushed head, as more and more of Hinata’s precum spewed out of the slit, dribbling down over Komaeda’s hand as he stroked him.

Komaeda was very thorough with his licking. His tongue dug under the thick collar of flesh at the base of the head before dragging it down the length and over the veins that pulsed against his tongue. He squeezed gently around him from the base and to the top before nibbling the accumulated essence forming thickly at the head.

Hinata pushed his head back and clasped his mouth, moaning hard against his hand that it reverberated in his throat while his stomach tightened.

“Hinata-kun is so big.” Komaeda breathed hotly against the flushed flesh, his gaze held a hidden thought as he stroked him.

Hinata wondered what he meant by that but he was too embarrassed to ask.

Komaeda’s lips were now so close to Hinata’s cockhead that every time Hinata jerked up, the head bumped his mouth. Hinata’s eyes snapped open as he sinfully imagined Komaeda’s mouth around him, the lewd thought had him twitching in the palm of Komaeda’s hand.

As if reading Hinata’s thoughts and with no hesitance, Komaeda’s lips closed around him and pushed his mouth down as he slurped along its length as his fist was worked the lower half of his shaft.

Hinata painfully arched his back, jolts of pleasure struck him like lightning as his voice hallowed to a throaty groan of Komaeda’s name.

Hinata felt Komaeda smile around him as he started to pump his head up and down with the rhythm of his fist, working more and more of him inside as the slurps got louder.

Hinata couldn't believe how good it felt.

Suddenly, Hinata's eyes opened when Komaeda pulled back and his cock plopped out of his mouth. Hinata gasped softly, mesmerized as a string of saliva connected to Komaeda's swollen lips.

With Hinata watching, Komaeda pulled down Hinata’s pants further enough to bear him fully. Then weighing down on Hinata’s stretched legs and putting his cock back into his mouth, he started to pump his head up and down along with the steady rhythm of his hand, working more and more of him inside his mouth as his other hand started juggling Hinata's balls, their fullness weighing on Komaeda's hand.

“ _A-Ahh!_ D-Don’t!”

Without stopping, Komaeda eagerly bobbed his head as it filled his mouth, his tongue swirled around and around the girth of the head as his hand gave his balls a light squeeze which made Hinata feel so embarrassed with how full they were.

Hinata arched his back off the mattress as he clutched on the pillows, his eyes rolling backward before shutting them tight. It was too much!

Komaeda moaned words around him, muffled by the fullness inside his mouth which Hinata could only translate into _‘Does it feel good?’_

Hinata stiffened harder, his hips jerked, hitting the back of Komaeda's throat.

Choking, Komaeda pulled back and coughed as saliva dripped from his lips. Hinata panicked as he sat up and held Komaeda's cheek, his eyes trembling with guilt, “K-Komaeda, are you okay?!”

Komaeda blinked through his heavy gaze and smiled, leaning against Hinata's warm hand. “I am.”

“I'm so sorry. I-I couldn't help myself and I hurt you.”

“It's okay.” Komaeda cut right in with a smile as he continued stroking him.

“Komaeda, it's fine. You don't need to-”

Without giving him a chance to finish, Komaeda pushed Hinata back lightly against the mattress, tucking a strand of his white locks behind his ear before pressing his mouth back down to his cock.

Hinata stiffened again inside that warm haven and stretched his legs further as much as his zipper could handle.

Komaeda watched him with keen eyes as he swallowed Hinata's cock with earnest vitality. He wasn't being quiet either. Komaeda moaned lewdly around him and sucked harder with the purpose of making Hinata listen to every wet slurp he was making.

Hinata choked on his own saliva as he twitched yet again inside Komaeda’s mouth, staining it with more of his juices. Trying to hold in the noises desperately trying to escape from his throat, Hinata bashfully covered his mouth with the back of his hand as Komaeda continued to mercilessly drive his sanity mad.

“O-Oh God, K-Komaeda. _Ah_...!” Hinata felt so ashamed of himself as his voice became louder, more broken and incoherent, and his breathing turned ragged.

Komaeda gave him a look that carried warmth and affection before he loosened his throat and slurped his way down until his mouth sealed firmly around his cock; further and deeper with every slurp until Komaeda was deep-throating him.

“A-A... _Ahhh_ ...feels...ah! K-Komaeda...s-so _good_. I c-can't...”

Hinata struggled to keep his eyes open, watching Komaeda through heavily flushed cheeks. Komaeda looked so erotic as his cheeks hollowed with every pull. It was such an arousing sight that he felt he could just come from it.

With the pleasure building up in his stomach, Hinata couldn’t help the small thrusts his hips made inside that heavenly mouth, his own balls thumping up and down with every thrust.

Komaeda pushed down on Hinata’s legs with his elbows to stop them from moving and continued sucking on him with fervor, swallowing him from time to time as saliva dripped down from his mouth. Komaeda dived in so deep with every slurp that his nose nuzzled against Hinata's coarse pubic hair whenever he deep-throated him while his thumbs lightly pressed and massaged the balls lying softly underneath.

Hinata swore he was high up in the heavens, his vision turned hazy and his body felt hot amidst the humidity of the dim-lighted room. His constant rugged breathing echoed in his ears, reminding him of the wreck he had turned into.

Just then, Komaeda moaned lewdly around him. Seemingly slow to savor him, Komaeda resumed to pull back just as the tip was about to slip out before diving the whole thing into his mouth, again and again.

Tearing his vision away from the arousing sight before him only to have his eyes fall on their shadows at the wall.

Hinata sucked in a sharp gasp when he felt his stomach tighten and turned his sight back to Komaeda. With another clench of his stomach, Hinata grunted in surprise as his body jerked, his eyes snapped in at how close he was.

Clutching on the sheets with trepidation, Hinata shuddered the words, “K-Komaeda, I'm gonna come.” He didn't want to come yet, or at least he wanted to come together with Komaeda. But the look in Komaeda's eyes told Hinata that Komaeda felt otherwise, especially when he smiled around his cock.

Hinata yelped as Komaeda ducked his head and sucked harder with every pull, bobbing his head ruthlessly to the hilt with merciless aggression, the friction becoming deliciously sweet and electrifying, causing Hinata's voice to crack under the sudden assault, sending unimaginable pleasures throughout Hinata's body that his hips jerked from the intensity.

Hinata heaved with the pleasure building up so fast in the pit of his stomach that he grabbed hold of Komaeda's surprisingly soft locks and tried to tell him to slow down. Yet, his body defied him when his body jerked once more to the thought of coming into Komaeda's mouth which made his thrusting hips tremble as he tried to keep them still.

With another surge of pleasure, Hinata gasped loudly as he pulled on Komaeda's locks. The pull might have stung Komaeda, making him moan louder than he had ever heard him. If Hinata didn't know any better, it was as if Komaeda wanted for him to come undone in his mouth.

Hinata felt he could rupture any moment.

Gripping strongly on the sheets and gritting hard on his teeth to stop himself, Hinata choked as he tried to get his voice through, “Komaeda, s-stop… **STOP**!!”, that single word vibrated through the walls of the room.

Hinata's lungs sucked in a sudden deep breath when Komaeda came to an abrupt halt. With eyes stretched wide open, Hinata gradually released the air sucked into his lungs, the surges in his body caused his toes to curl. His body shuddered as he had a hard time catching his breath and nearly came when he saw his cock poke against Komaeda's cheek.

As Hinata took gradual breaths to calm himself, Komaeda pulled back slowly as Hinata’s cock slipped out of his mouth and slapped softly against Hinata's heaving stomach. His thin lips swollen and smeared with dense pearly white which didn't help his state at all.

Feeling dejected, Komaeda’s eyes filled with guilt that he might have done something wrong. “What is it Hinata-kun? Was I not good?”

Good heavens, no!

Hinata took a moment to even out his breathing, pulling Komaeda to him by the neck and kissing him before he got any self-demeaning thoughts.

Surprised at first, Komaeda closed his eyes and kissed back earnestly, pushing his tongue inside Hinata’s mouth.

Alarmed by the taste, Hinata pulled his tongue back, but knowing Komaeda pleasured him unconditionally so, he appreciatively kissed him back. Strangely, the act itself roused him even further as he nipped at his lips and tongue to lick any smear left.

Hinata pulled back and caressed his pale cheek, and with a warm smile he said, “You were amazing, Komaeda. I just…” bashfully blushing, he said, “I want to savor our moment together more.” Softly caressing Komaeda's white locks as his eyes turned soft, “Right now,” Hinata's voice dipped to a feverish husky voice, “I want to see _you_.” Hinata said as he slid his hands down his pale torso and hooked his fingers around the hem of Komaeda's pants.

“Then, let's get you fully undressed first, Hinata-kun.” Komaeda said as he pulled Hinata's pants and undergarment off and threw them on the pile.

“Your turn, Komaeda.”

Komaeda smiled as he pulled back and stood on his knees.

Sitting up, Hinata unbuttoned Komaeda's pants and pulled down the zipper. Next, Hinata pulled down the pants and undergarment together.

Komaeda's face flushed with excitement, squinting his eyes as his flushed cock sprang up out of its confines and bearing itself in front of Hinata's gazing eyes.

Picking up one leg then the other, Komaeda's pants followed the clothes on the floor.

Komaeda moved closer between Hinata's legs and placed his hands on Hinata’s shoulders as Hinata held him closer.

Hinata affectionately placed a soft kiss on his belly button and smiled when Komaeda tucked his stomach. Then Hinata gazed at his fair cock and felt his heart run wild; it was heavily flushed with a reddish color from the top, and he was leaking so hard, dripping down his length.

 _‘God, he’s beautiful.’_ Hinata thought. Although it shouldn't be surprising or heart-throbbing to see another man's cock, but seeing Komaeda's had set his heart on fire. Gazing hard at it, Hinata smiled shyly before holding it and placing a soft kiss on the head.

Komaeda gave out a shivery breath, “H-Hinata-kun.”

It was Hinata's turn to make Komaeda feel good.

Hinata gave a few strokes while his other hand slid up Komaeda's hip, feeling him shiver under his touch as he gave soft delicate circles.

Hinata heard Komaeda’s whimpering moans as he stroked. Hinata's hand made sweet slick sounds that left his heart pounding.

Komaeda hunched over, arms wrapped around him as he tried to restrain himself from bucking into Hinata's hand, toes curling against the sheets as Hinata continued to stroke him.

Running his hand over Komaeda's body, he admired the softness of his skin. Gently caressing, his fingers travelled up his leg and pressed softly against his plump cheek.

Komaeda made a small noise and buried himself onto Hinata’s hair with moans trembling out of his lips. Hinata blushed as he fondled with it.

When Hinata accidentally traced the tip of his fingers in between the cheeks, Komaeda threw his head back and gave out a soft surprising cry. Hinata’s breath hitched as he stared up wide-eyed.

Looking back down at Hinata, Komaeda bit down on his lips, his eyes drew to trembling slits.

With such an expression, Hinata tempted to touch there again and when he did, Komaeda’s ass gave a sudden clench as he bit down harder on his trembling lips. “Hi...Hinata…” he gently cried out, “n-not... _there…_ ”

“You mean here?” Hinata rubbed his finger across the tight muscle and Komaeda gasped, digging his nails into Hinata’s shoulders.

“Mnggh, Hinata-k-kun…”

“Does it...make you feel good, Komaeda?”

But Komaeda did nothing but turn his head. He had his eyes squeezed shut as a blush spread across his cheeks.

Curious to draw out more reactions, Hinata pressed and rubbed gently against it, turning Komaeda into a mewling mess.

Hinata stared wide-eyed in awe, “Komaeda. Does it really feel this good?” asked as his cheeks burned. In all honesty, he didn’t know if men would feel good having that place rubbed over like that. He was genuinely curious and he wanted to pleasure Komaeda.

“Hi...Hinata…” Komaeda couldn't talk straight as his voice trembled with bashfulness.

Hinata smiled as he lowered his lips down onto Komaeda’s flushed cockhead and placed a chaste kiss, loving this man even more.

As Hinata smiled warmly, he asked, “Can I press my fingers inside?”

Komaeda opened his eyes in genuine shock, as if he never imagined Hinata would ask such a thing.

“But Hinata-kun… i-it’s filthy.”

“That’s not what I asked, Komaeda.”

“B-but…”

“Do you?” Hinata cut in.

After some silence, Komaeda asked, “Do you want to touch inside me, Hinata-kun?”

It was Hinata’s turn to feel his cheeks burn as he stuttered bashfully, “If… if it'll make you feel good, then yes. I do.” Hinata blushed harder as he heard himself say the words.

But Komaeda was too bashful to give him an answer, so Hinata stood on his knees as well and held Komaeda close in his arms as he whispered against his lips, “What is it, Komaeda, tell me? What do you really want?”

Sliding down his hands against his firm torso, Komaeda pursed his lips before whispering “I want to feel you, Hinata-kun... _i-inside me_.”

“You mean my fingers?”

Komaeda’s blush darkened as he said, “All of you.”

When Hinata gave him a confused look, Komaeda held Hinata's cock in his hand then gave Hinata a pleading look, insinuating what he meant.

Hinata’s eyes grew wide as his cheeks burned when realization struck him.

“Y-You mean…?”

Suddenly, Hinata found it hard to swallow and his heart trembled as nervousness rushed through him “A-Are you sure?”

“Yes.” Komaeda responded quickly.

 _‘Is that even possible?’_ Hinata thought.

“Are you really sure? Wouldn't that be painful?”

Komaeda smiled, looking down between their bodies as he said, “Don't worry about me, Hinata-kun. All I want to do...” He lifted his eyes and whispered, “...is to feel you thrusting up inside me over and over until I couldn't tell the world around me anymore.”

Hinata’s jaw dropped as he stood there awestruck.

Without a second to spare, Hinata pulled him into a hard kiss. Komaeda eagerly kissed back, wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing their bodies against each other.

Through rough kisses, their hands went wild. Hinata fondled with his plump cheeks, kneading them thoroughly and appreciating how full and soft they were.

But anxiety slowly crept in.

_‘Can I fit inside Komaeda?’_

Curiously, Hinata tried pressing his finger inside, but he couldn’t get passed one digit without Komaeda wincing in pain.

Hinata groaned between kisses and pulled his finger out, using the other hand that was still slick with Komaeda’s precum. It helped him slip in but it still wasn’t enough. He couldn’t imagine putting his whole cock inside.

Komaeda pulled from his lips and said, “W-wait, Hinata-kun. I have something that can work as lubricant. I often use it on my skin when it gets too dry.”

When Hinata nodded, Komaeda smiled and climbed off Hinata to reach the drawer.

“Is it really okay?” Hinata said anxiously as Komaeda climbed back with the small bottle. It was Hinata's first time to have sex after all and he had no knowledge how two men had sex together.

Komaeda nodded with a smile before opening the bottle and squirting a good amount on his fingers, slicking them well before bringing them behind and pressed his fingers inside him.

Hinata wondered if his cheeks could get any hotter.

Komaeda made little noises as he moved his fingers and started fingering himself with his eyes closed.

Hinata's couldn’t help pumping his own cock at the view before him. It was truly a sight to behold and he couldn’t feel more aroused. He wondered if Komaeda did this to himself often. This couldn’t have been his first time doing that.

“Do you like watching me, Hinata-kun? Do you like watching me touch myself?”

Hinata pulled Komaeda into a heated kiss and breathed between lush kisses, “I want to touch you myself.”

“But it’s dirty.”

“I said I want to do it.” Hinata said determined, surprising himself as well as Komaeda. He then pulled Komaeda to his arms, hiding his blush over his shoulder.

“Hinata-kun?”

Hinata swore his heart was going to burst from the embarrassment. When Komaeda called his name again, Hinata pulled back and gave him a small kiss then sighed with a smile, “Let me touch you.”

Komaeda blushed, stared dumbfounded and speechless as he watched Hinata squirt an amount from the bottle and slicked his fingers, following Komaeda's example.

Then Hinata pulled him to his arms and whispered against his lips. “Tell me if I do something wrong, okay?”

Komaeda nodded with a blush as Hinata pressed a finger inside of him, drawing a soft gasp from his lips.

“Like this, Komaeda?”

Komaeda pursed his lips and shuddered in Hinata's arms. Hinata felt a shiver run through him as Komaeda breathed Hinata's name in his ear.

“Does it...make you feel good?” Hinata whispered in a husky voice as Komaeda nodded.

“Like this?” Hinata said as eased a finger in and out of him.

“Ahh..!” Komaeda moaned.

Feeling there was enough space, Hinata pushed in another finger and Komaeda clenched around him and his breath shuddered more.

Feeling the heat and tightness wrap around him, Hinata's heart pounded harder as the warm sensations overwhelmed him. Hinata enjoyed listening to the slick noises his fingers made. Having his fingers inside Komaeda like that, not even his wildest dreams went that far.

Their lips found each other in sweet feverish kisses before Komaeda pushed himself onto Hinata and plopped then back together onto the mattress.

Hinata enjoyed watching Komaeda come undone. Hinata took in deep breaths, clenching his stomach to hold his excitement as his blood rushed from watching Komaeda moan over him before burying his face onto his shoulder.

As he fingered him, a single thought passed through Hinata's mind.

Hinata whispered in his ear, “Komaeda, have you done this with anyone before?” He felt Komaeda smile against his cheek.

“Would you feel jealous if I have?”

Suddenly, Hinata pulled his fingers out and flipped him around with Komaeda's back against the mattress.

Komaeda stared wide-eyed at Hinata who towered over him with his hands on each side of his messy white hair.

“Have you?” Hinata repeated with his eyebrows furrowing, jealousy evident in his peering eyes.

Komaeda’s lips lifted to a smile. His eyes danced with joy at watching jealousy burn in Hinata’s eyes.

That smile bothered Hinata a great deal. He didn't want Komaeda to make a fool of him when his emotions were all over the place.

Komaeda wrapped his arms around him affectionately as he gently breathed, “I haven’t. No one would ever take trash like me to bed.”

When Hinata's eyes still showed doubt and jealousy, Komaeda smiled knowingly, his voice sensual as he said, “If you're wondering how I know things, I've read a lot of books, Hinata-kun. And I've played with myself before.”

Hinata’s face was burning up again, imagining Komaeda doing this to himself. _And what kind of books does Komaeda read anyway?!_

Komaeda's smile widened and his eyes squinted, “You want to know?” Komaeda pulled Hinata down and whispered haughtily in his ear, “I finger myself, the same way you were doing just few moments ago.”

Hinata's face turned deep red as his ears felt like releasing some of the pressure building up in his throbbing chest.

Hinata grabbed the hand that was sliding down his face and pressed down on his wrist against the mattress as Hinata leaned down to Komaeda's lips.

Komaeda stared as Hinata whispered, “Was it just fingers?”

Komaeda nodded before gasping softly when Hinata pressed down his lower body and rubbed between his plump cheeks.

“Then I want to be your first, Komaeda.” Hinata said with confidence as he watched Komaeda's eyes widen slightly before a warm a blush spread over his pale cheeks.

Komaeda lips turned to a smile before pulling his legs further back, offering himself. “Then loosen me up more, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata swallowed hard as he pressed his fingers back in and Komaeda’s back arched in pleasure. Hinata felt the hole loosen when he tried stretching his fingers inside, scissoring, and twisted them around, making Komaeda squirm and writhe against the sheets.

‘So fingering is some kind of preparation for what's to come?’

Although Hinata had said he wanted to be Komaeda's first with a calm endeavor, his brain simply fried at the thought.

“Ah!”

Komaeda sucked in a breath, body jerking in surprise. His toes fanning out before scrunching up cutely.

Hinata's eyes grew expectantly wide. “What is it Komaeda?”

“Th-There!”

Komaeda arched his back again when Hinata moved his fingers.

“Here?” Hinata said as his fingertips brushed over a soft gland inside of Komaeda.

Komaeda's face flushed as he nodded. He made little noises until he gasped and clenched around him yet again.

“This part… makes you feel good?” Hinata moved his fingers again and watched as Komaeda squirmed.

Komaeda nodded with a mewl and Hinata smiled affectionately before moving his fingers again.

“Ngg...mgff…Hi...Hinata...yes...there, _ahh!”_

Komaeda buried the back of his head onto the pillow and exasperated in pleasure, clutching the sheets tight, lifting his hips up slightly, trying to get most out of Hinata's fingers inside.

Hinata breathed hotly as his eyes lidded heavily with lust. He swore Komaeda would be the end of him. The throbbing in his chest threatened to burst.

Hinata couldn't take it any longer. He pulled his fingers out in a rush, making Komaeda gasp at the sudden loss.

Komaeda was momentarily dazed and high as his body deflated slowly. He lifted his eyes and watched Hinata reach for the bottle before squirting a good amount on his cock.

Komaeda bit his finger and his cheeks drew a darker shade of red as he waited in anticipation. Mentally preparing himself, he spread his legs further for Hinata.

Hinata placed himself between his legs, feeling excited, nervous and anxious at the same time. He tried to calm his rush by taking in deep breaths.

“Are you ready, Komaeda?”

“Yes,” Komaeda said in a exhilarated voice.

“I’m going in.”

Komaeda nodded before Hinata held his cock and slowly pressed it against the tight muscle. Tensing around him, Komaeda gasped out a choked noise, clamping around the invading cock. Drawing his legs back, his hips arched off the mattress as he winced softly in pain.

Hinata tried to push in past the cockhead but the tightness threatened to choke him. He couldn't possibly push it any further.

“K-Komaeda, you're so _tight_!” Hinata grunted in pain.

Komaeda shuddered visibly, biting down on his trembling lips.

"Hi-Hinata-kun..." Komaeda breathed out quietly, voice strained. He took in a few breaths, seemingly trying to relax but his breath kept shuddering.

When Hinata saw anxiety and strain in Komaeda's eyes, he quickly cupped his soft cheek and made Komaeda look at him.

"A-Are you okay, Komaeda?" Hinata asked concerned. “Does it hurt?

Komaeda tried to say no yet when Hinata made the slightest move, Komaeda winced in pain and shivered visibly.

“Komaeda, I'm pulling out.”

Suddenly, Komaeda desperately held Hinata's face and breathed against him. “H-Hinata-kun, k-kiss me.”

Hinata blinked before his eyes softened as he saw the desperation in those eyes. Leaning down, he kissed Komaeda gently, nibbling at his lips before burying his whole mouth against his. Hinata then felt the walls around him loosen.

Hinata realized he needed to make Komaeda lose all tension.

“Relax, Komaeda. I'm here for you. And I'll always be here so take your time. I'm not going anywhere.”

Komaeda desperately held onto him. “H-Hinata-kun.”

Hinata smiled as he intertwined their fingers together. “Let's feel good together, Komaeda.”

Komaeda nodded with a smile.

Warm breaths shivered against the other as they nuzzled their noses in sweet caresses. Hinata planted soft kisses on Komaeda's closed eyes, cheeks, jaw, and lips while giving Komaeda's cock a few pumps to help in easing Komaeda's tension.

Hinata breathed praises and affectionate words as he trailed heated kisses along his throat and down to the nook of his shoulder. He nipped at his chin and trailed a tongue across his jaw, smoothing Komaeda gently by sliding a hand down his side where he ran light circles across his waist and hips. Hinata continued to bury himself until he was fully inside.

Hinata drew in a few shivering breaths. He never imagined being inside of someone would feel that good. The pressure was building up as he buried himself to the hilt.

“Y-You’re all in, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata nodded with a grunt before burying his face onto his bony shoulder, his breath shuddering, “It feels so good inside you, Komaeda.”

Komaeda smiled through trembling lips and breathed heavily between the words, “I feel you, deep inside me, throbbing. I feel you, r-right here…”

“We've become one, _K-Komaeda_.” Hinata smiled shyly as his breathing shuddered as well.

Komaeda's eyes glistened with joy at the words, feeling so happy as he gazed with admiration. Hinata mirrored the affectionate expression before kissing him.

When Hinata moved, Komaeda's back arched against the mattress, nails digging into his skin, making Hinata groan lightly in his throat as he whispered between kisses, “Does it still hurt?”

Komaeda shook his head and whispered a no before meeting Hinata's lips again. Yet, Komaeda whimpered again when Hinata moved.

“Komaeda?”

“D-Don’t worry about me, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata looked deep within his pale-green eyes and spoke gently against his lips, his thumb caressing his flushed cheek, “Be honest with me, Komaeda. I don’t want you to be in pain.”

Komaeda smiled and leaned toward his warmth. “I’m just so happy.”

“Eh?”

“Having you inside m-me...makes me really happy, Hinata-kun.”

“Komaeda…” Hinata couldn't help blushing at the words.

“Please Hinata-kun, I want your hope to fill me. Release your hope...” Komaeda released his breath as he looked deep within Hinata’s eyes, “ ... _inside_ me.”

Hinata gasped softly, his heartbeat turning erratic. Komaeda slid his hand down Hinata's chest and stopped at his heart. His blush mirrored Hinata's as he felt his heartbeats. “Hinata-kun.”

Hinata smiled bashfully and hid his face onto Komaeda's shoulder. Komaeda smiled in return as he wrapped his arms around him in a loving embrace before Hinata started easing his cock back and forth into his body.

Hinata listened to the soft slick noises along with Komaeda's shuddering breaths. His hips moved in a gentle rhythm, the slick friction being so sweet. Hinata tried not to lose himself in the heat.

Hinata moved his hips to thrust a little quicker, pushing Komaeda lightly back with every thrust.

Hinata grabbed Komaeda's hips and started thrusting in harder, his balls hitting his ass in hard slaps.

With every slap, Hinata's heart throbbed, leaving Komaeda begging his name desperately over and over again as he rasped desperately for air.

The quiet room echoed with nothing except their hard breathing and the sound of the bed creaking.

_Slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap._

Hinata had his face buried onto Komaeda’s shoulder, eyes closed in concentration while Komaeda pressed his mouth against Hinata's ear and made him listen to every lewd cry he was making.

The exertion had Hinata sweating as droplets trickled down his forehead, his chest and his whole body. The heat drove him insane as he lost control of his lower body.

The sweet simulation drove his body wild. The intense heat and the unimaginable pleasure were very overwhelming. Hinata felt his heart was about to give out from the intensity of it.

Komaeda's cries of pleasure were so delicious, _intoxicating_ , that Hinata grabbed hold of his ass and pounded harder and deeper inside him, purposely in hopes to thrust against that place inside that made Komaeda feel so good.

Komaeda rasped, his breathing turned rugged and his voice pitched higher in pleased cries and in sweet shivering of Hinata's name. His whole body jerked with the intensity of Hinata's rigorous thrusting, his legs fumbling in the air.

_Slapslapslapslapslapslapslapslap._

Fiery and wild, the whole room reeked of their love-making session.

“K... Komaeda, I'm _c-close_.” Hinata grunted, his lungs nearly out of air.

Komaeda made a sound as he nodded as soft tears trickled the sides of his face.

“Let's come _together_.” Hinata said.

Holding him tighter, Hinata grunted with every thrust, his hips never stopped moving. The heat in his stomach ready to burst at any moment.

After a few hard thrusts, Hinata grunted out a broken ‘Komaeda’ before burying himself inside him.

Komaeda's body jolted and strained, his body shuddering in place as he clenched around Hinata, drawing out a throaty moan.

Hinata cried out at the intensity, burying his cries against Komaeda’s shoulder as his cock convulsed inside of him. His hips didn't stop moving as Komaeda's ass trembled, drawing out and drinking all that built-up pleasure.

Panting hard and deep, Hinata dropped on Komaeda's chest as he tried to make sense of his surroundings. He can feel the hard rise and fall of Komaeda's chest and the slick feeling between their stomachs.

Hinata moved to look between their bodies, huffing out his amazement at the scene. He swore he had never seen anything more heart-throbbing. Komaeda's cock lied there softly, exempt from the mess it had made. The essence alone nearly got him hard again.

Komaeda winced at the slightest moves, his eyes closed as sweat trickled down his forehead.

Hinata couldn't catch a proper breath as he combed Komaeda's hair back from his face, “Are you okay, Komaeda?”

Komaeda opened his heavy-lidded eyes and was met with Hinata's loving eyes, filled with concern.

Taking a moment to even out his breathing, Komaeda returned his affectionate gaze and smiled warmly. Placing his hand on his cheek, Komaeda pulled him in for a kiss.

After their breathing evened out, Hinata placed another kiss on the side of Komaeda's lips as he whispered, “I'm pulling out now.”

Komaeda winced softly as Hinata pulled his hips back, cock slipping out as white and thick juices dripped down, staining the sheets.

“You came a lot, didn't you? That makes me happy, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata bashfully looked at him, “...Y-You too.”

“Because you were so good to me, Hinata-kun. I can feel your cum deep inside me.”

Hinata's cheeks burned hotter, “D-Don’t say that.”

Komaeda gave a small chuckle as his eyes glinted playfully, “Don't worry, Hinata-kun. You won't get me pregnant.”

Hinata seriously failed to understand how Komaeda could say these things without an ounce of embarrassment. Nonetheless, his words continue to drive his fiery heart ablaze.

Komaeda looked deep into Hinata's eyes, his smile melting to one of a lustful gaze as he whispered, “Thank you, Hinata-kun, for this unforgettable night.”

Hinata's eyes softened as a blush caressed his cheeks.

Drawing Hinata closer, warm breaths caressed against the other's lips invitingly.

“Komaeda…” He whispered lovingly.

They breathed warmly through their noses as their lips pressed on one another. Long and drawn, Hinata couldn't pull away.

Tilting their heads, their mouths touched in feathery kisses, their warm breaths roused Hinata as he held Komaeda's body closer, yet fatigue quickly caught up to him. He took a moment before asking, “Can I sleep with you here tonight?”

Komaeda blinked softly before nodding with a smile. Hinata smiled back and his heart fluttered with joy.

Hinata didn't realize how exhausted he was until he lied down on the soft mattress next to him. He smiled tiredly and Komaeda returned his smile. He pulled him closer so Komaeda would sleep whilst listening to the beats of his heart; a tune that soon soothed Komaeda to sleep with a smile on his lips.

It wasn't a dream. It was very real. He made love to Komaeda and he couldn't ask for anything more that night. These burning emotions dwelling in his heart fuled him with life, vitality and purpose. A reason to look forward for tomorrow, to see that beautiful bright smile of his.

He never imagined his heart would one day beat this strongly for someone else. It scared and thrilled him at the same time.

That night he learned one of the beautiful marvels about life.

Love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Which parts you enjoyed the most? I WANT to read your full reactions to this.
> 
> -  
> Check Tumblr under the tags "my edit" or "my fic" to see my Komahina edits, and my Youtube for Komahina AMVs.  
> Tumblr: http://moonlessnight126.tumblr.com/  
> Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/moonlessnight126


	6. Sinful indulgence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the long hiatus!! I hope you’ll still enjoy the update!
> 
> Warning: NSFW content... again.
> 
> Reminder: Hinata and Komaeda's ages are 17.  
> Year: 1912
> 
> Growing up in the world they live in, life demands so much from these young men. Their hopes and dreams are shackled by society where only money and wealth prevails. As the boys sail to the new world, they learn more about themselves, find the hope that dwells within, and most important of all, they discover love with all of its purity and complexity. But what if this love destroys them? What if fate turns cruel and merciless? What if it's all an illusion and it's not too late to turn back and choose a different route?
> 
> Notes:  
> Aboard the Titanic, there were no private bathrooms in suites, even with the first class except for a privileged few. Hinata is not one of them.

**Sinful Indulgence**

The dim light of dawn shone through the small window while soft breaths resounded within the room.

Hinata felt a slight shiver in his sleep so he leaned closer to the warmth radiating from the body lying next to him and breathed softly against the back of a long, smooth neck. Another shiver propped Hinata to hold onto the warmth of the body pressed against him.

_So warm…_

Gradually rising to awareness, Hinata had barely opened his tired eyes before his view clouded into a blurry vision. He knew he drank too much the previous night and his emotions had been in so much turmoil, that it was enough to give him a slight headache. His thoughts then wandered, did he pass out in bed after drinking? He was too tired to bother.

What _time_ was it anyway? He knew he didn't get enough and he just wanted to fall back to sleep, just a little bit more, before his parents woke him up.

But something felt different that it made Hinata's brows furrow in his sleep.

Opening his eyes once again, with his vision still a bit blurry from sleep. His eyes landed on the smooth and pale skin. Trying to make sense of where he was, he closed his eyes once more and wondered if he was dreaming of Komaeda again.

 _Komaeda_ …

Hinata involuntarily pulled that body closer to himself and breathed in the scent. He heard soft breaths from the figure lying next to him and smiled. This was a really beautiful dream.

Wait… Was it ...a _dream_?

The clock ticked away through the silence. With every tick, Hinata’s eyes opened proportionally to a shocked expression as he felt his arms physically wrapped around a slim figure whose back was pressed against his chest.

His eyes glimmered as memories of the previous night flooded into his mind as he stared at those beautiful white locks. His heart raced in the wake of his realization that was slowly melting away to steady, sharp beats. Heat rose to his cheeks as one thought repeated again and again in his mind.

It was no dream.

Slowly, his eyelids fell halfway as he gazed with affection at the man sleeping soundly in his arms and a warm smile made its way to his lips before holding his sleeping figure closer.

When Komaeda stirred gently in his sleep and drew out a warm sigh, Hinata’s breath was caught in his lungs. Komaeda must have sensed that he was awake because he looked behind him before he turned in his arms and greeted him with a sleepy smile.

Hinata gazed at those messy locks and at the undeniable allure of those eyes. They were enough to make Hinata speechless before Komaeda parted his lips and spoke the words in a hoarse breathy voice, “Good morning, Hinata-kun.”

Finding his voice, Hinata smiled sheepishly as warmth spread through his chest, “Morning, Komaeda.”

Komaeda's smile grew warmer and his eyes squinted lovingly.

Their long legs entangled together, their toes curled lovingly with one another and their morning breaths grew heavy and warm, only enticing them more as they drew closer to one another. They gazed silently into each other’s eyes before Komaeda spoke in a breathy voice, “I'm surprised, Hinata-kun.”

“With what?”

“You're still here.” When Hinata gave him a confused look, Komaeda continued saying, “I thought you'd leave the moment you woke up.”

Hinata frowned. “...I’m not cruel, Komaeda.”

Komaeda took a moment before saying with a knowing gaze, “No, you aren’t.”

Hinata gave a pout because somehow, Komaeda still thought of him in that way. Thinking he’d leave him after the deed was done. “I'm not going anywhere, Komaeda.” He said reassuringly.

Komaeda gazed into his eyes in wonder as he slid his fingers lightly on his chest. “You don’t have any regrets, Hinata-kun? Sleeping with such trash like me. It would be understandable if you did.”

Hinata's brows furrowed before he vehemently disagreed. “What? No! I already told you Komaeda, about how I truly feel about you.”

With the silent gaze Komaeda was giving him, Hinata’s heart rate quickened. He cleared his throat and felt heat rise to his cheeks yet again. Holding his pale hand over his chest, he continued saying, “I meant every word I said, Komaeda. And I could never regret it. Last night, was... unforgettable, a night that I’ll continue to cherish deeply.”

A short silence followed as Komaeda closed his eyes. Hinata's blush darkened in a deeper shade the longer the silence dawned and wondered what Komaeda was thinking.

“K... Komaeda…?”

Komaeda scooped closer and opened his eyes with a soft expression gracing his features as he whispered breathlessly, “Me too.”

Hinata's heart skipped a beat before his eyes softened and pulled Komaeda closer, making their lower bodies press in an endearing soft touch.

Baring a smile, Komaeda chuckled softly while Hinata bit his lip to hold his own that slowly melted into silence once more as they stared into each other's eyes.

“Ne, Hinata-kun, how does it feel?”

“Hmm?”

Komaeda's voice dropped, turning deep and sensual as he whispered against Hinata's lips, “Losing your virginity and… _taking_ away mine.” His eyes squinted at the baffled look Hinata gave him while his lips drew a keen smile.

Komaeda really knew how to tie Hinata’s heart in a knot, as if he enjoyed riling him up on purpose.

Drawing in a soft, slow breath, Hinata swallowed hard as he recalled last night's passion and the way Komaeda moaned and thrashed in his arms.

“Wouldn't you have rather wanted your first with a girl, Hinata-kun, or…” his hand glided to Hinata's lower back and held firmly before giving shallow, slow thrusts with his hips, making their soft bulges rub against each other as his voice shivered heatedly, “... did it feel good, .. _inside_ me?

Hinata's eyes stilled to wide eyes and his cheeks burned hot while his heart beated vigorously.

There was that uncanny smile again.

Hinata came to realize how dangerous what Komaeda was doing to his heart.

In an instant, Komaeda was flipped on his back as Hinata pinned him down with his body.

“Hinata... kun?” Komaeda said in his breathy, surprised voice, but then his eyelids closed halfway in endearment when he saw the fire that burned inside Hinata's eyes. Komaeda gently placed his hand on Hinata's cheek and caressed tenderly while he tipped his lips up and coaxed Hinata closer.

Hinata found it difficult to resist him as his lips hovered over his. He _couldn't_ resist. He could barely hold his sanity together when Komaeda spoke with him that way.

Hinata dipped down and pressed his lips against his. The moment their lips touched, Hinata sighed warmly through his nose while Komaeda gave a soft moan.

The sweetness of the kiss made Hinata feel all warm inside. Nothing could drive Hinata wilder than listening to Komaeda's breathy moans between kisses.

Craving for more, Hinata nipped softly on his lips; long and drawn, before he coaxed Komaeda to open his mouth.

Hinata gently twirled his tongue with his inside Komaeda's mouth, listening to him swallowing his own muffled moans.

Wanting to be devoured by Hinata's mouth, Komaeda moaned eagerly, urging and arousing Hinata further as his pale hands roamed over his body and round his ass, sending shivers throughout Hinata's body.

Hinata found himself reaching behind and gently squeezing plump cheeks as he drowned into the warmth of Komaeda’s mouth. As Hinata humped against him, Komaeda involuntarily shivered as he felt Hinata’s girth rubbing torturously against him. Hinata broke away from Komaeda's mouth and breathed his name with intolerable need.

With his face deeply flushed and eyes heavily lidded with lust, Komaeda moaned Hinata’s name with a desperate plea reverberating in his voice. Hinata recognized that look instantly. The feeling of being desired, of being wanted, made Komaeda feel happiest the most and it reflected in his eyes.

When Hinata looked upon Komaeda's stomach and saw the residue of last night's passion; dry semen staining his figure in an erotic, arousing way, his face mirrored the flush that heavily resided on Komaeda's cheeks.

“Hinata-kun…” Komaeda moaned in that breathy voice of his. How Hinata loved to hear his name come out of those lips. It always filled him with a staggering rush.

Hinata dragged his hands over that frail body and felt the shivers, the goosebumps, the rise and fall of his stomach until his hand gently wrapped around his beautiful flaccid cock and gave it a few quick pumps.

Komaeda buried the side of his face onto the pillow and moaned in a manner that turned Hinata on in so many ways. Each stroke made squelching noises that resounded harmoniously in Hinata’s ears as he watched the fluid pouring from the slit and drizzled down, drenching his hand with that aromatic essence.

Hinata loved the feeling of Komaeda's cock in his hand; its contour, the curving that made the flesh so beautiful, the pulsing veins and the swollen head, and the wet sounds it made as he stroked along its length. He could feel his heart ready to burst as his eyes poured with devotion for him.

“Ah~... _Nghh_ , Hi... Hinata...Mhmm…”

Hinata dragged his lips along his smooth neck and said the words with heated breaths right against his ear where he knew Komaeda was sensitive, “You're very beautiful, Komaeda.”

Komaeda arched with a jolt as shivers ran down his neck and to his back.

Hinata peered into his eyes while he gave a light squeeze and twisted his wrist around, dragging skin against the head and then flattening it down, making the noises squelch louder with every stroke.

Komaeda moaned needily as he spread his legs further and threw his head back against the pillow, baring his smooth neck, his Adam’s apple bouncing as he swallowed with difficulty, his breaths turning erratic as his hips moved along with Hinata's vigorous stroking.

Hinata’s breathing trembled at the sight of him, turning headier and difficult as he watched Komaeda’s body tremble under his touch. Gently planting soft kisses on the side of Komaeda's face, he whispered his name heatedly into his ear and Komaeda's grip onto him tightened.

Hinata looked into Komaeda’s eyes, dilated and unfocused, and buried his mouth to his open panting one and drank him in.

Hinata felt Komaeda’s cock twitch, his legs shaking uncontrollably, his voice trembling as he moaned, “Ngghh, Hi-Hina.. nata...kun. _A-Ahh!_ ”

Suddenly, Komaeda bucked into his hand one last time before arching his back and his cock convulsed uncontrollably as streams of hot semen shot into the air.

Hinata’s surprised eyes turned soft as they gazed with affection, heavily lidded, with a blush tinting his cheeks as he watched the cock spurt onto his pale stomach.

Komaeda's body trembled before it dilated softly, his cock softening in Hinata's hand.

As Komaeda tried to catch his breath, he looked at Hinata and his eyes widened when Hinata pulled his drenched hand and licked a finger. His blush deepened and his eyes glistened with endearment before Hinata leaned towards him and gently smiled.

Their already lowered eyes closed before their lips reunited eagerly for a kiss. Slow and soft, their lips slipped away from each other. One more gaze into each other’s eyes before Hinata cupped Komaeda’s cheek and grabbed his lower lip with his own lips, gently sucking, eliciting a gentle moan before Komaeda gasped when Hinata reached around him with his drenched fingers and touched him _there_ , rubbing circles around the tight ring of muscles.

“A-Ahh…”

Hinata’s brows furrowed when Komaeda writhed against the sheets, uncomfortably so. Wincing softly, Hinata couldn't help but feel that pain was laced with Komaeda's voice when he attempted to push his finger inside.

Hinata pulled his hand away and asked with worry, “Komaeda…, are you okay?”

Komaeda swallowed with difficulty as he managed to say, “... Don’t worry about me, Hinata-kun.”

_Why was Komaeda in pain? Was his illness acting up somehow?_

“What is it? Tell me.”

Komaeda broke away from his gaze and it made Hinata more confused, especially with how flushed Komaeda's cheeks have become.

“Are you feverish?” Hinata placed his hand on his slightly sweaty forehead then on his cheek but there was no fever, yet Komaeda's cheeks burned hot. Hinata failed to understand why. The touch made Komaeda look at him as Hinata eyes genuinely reflected his concern.

“Are you in pain, Komaeda?”

Komaeda smiled, seemingly touched, “Nothing to worry about.”

“Where are you hurting?”

Komaeda took a moment, searching his eyes before he caressed Hinata’s cheek and breathed softly against his lips, “Hinata-kun, you shouldn't bother, caring about me so much.”

Hinata frowned as his thoughts slipped through, “ _Of course I would care_.” Komaeda’s eyes slightly widened as Hinata blushed at his sudden outburst.

Casting his eyes down, Hinata pressed his fingers once again against his entrance and his brows furrowed curiously when Komaeda bit his lower lip and winced once again.

“Wait. Could it possibly be that you're hurting from-...?” Hinata stopped himself midway.

When Komaeda looked at him, Hinata's eyes widened at the realization and his own face mirrored the same shade of embarrassment Komaeda had as his mind swallowed the rest of his question.

‘Komaeda was probably hurting f-from....’

Hinata couldn't even finish his thoughts without having his whole face turn beet red. He didn't know whether that was a good or bad thing but the mere idea of it had Hinata blowing steam out of his ears.

“D-does it hurt?”

That was an utterly stupid question to ask, Hinata admitted to himself.

“I’m fine,” Komaeda replied reassuringly.

“I asked if it hurts, Komaeda. Was I… rough on you last night?”

Komaeda couldn't help but smile before he tipped his lips up and captured a soft kiss on Hinata's lips. Slowly his lips slipped from Hinata's own as he whispered softly, “First times are meant to be that way and you were my first, Hinata-kun. Last night, you were very gentle with trash like me and blessed me with all sorts of pleasures.”

Komaeda chuckled softly as he saw the look of utter embarrassment on Hinata’s face, and as he caressed his face lovingly, he finally said, “You have claimed me as yours, Hinata-kun.”

‘Claimed?’

Hinata's heart skipped a beat, his eyes wide and glazed, cheeks flushed deep and his breath caught in his lungs.

The word rang in his ears with every thump of his beating heart.

Hinata smiled warmly before he closed his eyes and gently nuzzled the tip of his nose with Komaeda's in sweet caresses as he chuckled softly, “You claimed me first, Komaeda. I promise to be gentler next time.”

When Komaeda looked at him with a glint in his eyes, Hinata didn't know why he felt flustered all of a sudden. “I-I mean…, when you feel better, i-if you want to…”

Seeing Hinata stammer had Komaeda draw out a soft chuckle. “I look forward to it,” he said haughtily.

The beautiful sound of his laughter made Hinata's heart flutter as he gently cupped his cheek and leaned in for another kiss.

Hinata found himself melting once again into Komaeda's arms and into the passionate kisses as the clock ticked away in the room. Suddenly, Hinata pulled back, alarmed. With one look at the clock, he snatched himself away from Komaeda and hurriedly picked up his clothes.

Komaeda leaned up on his elbow as he watched Hinata scurry about in the room,“What is it, Hinata-kun?”

“My parents! I need to head back before they wake up.”

Komaeda watched as Hinata dressed in haste and quickly rushed to the door.

Halting and turning in his steps to say goodbye, Hinata felt awestruck when he gazed upon the bed; the way Komaeda lied there, beautifully naked with the sheets entangled around his body, barely hiding his pelvis, was a sight to behold. He felt a strong nudge in his heart and his cheeks burned hot while his eyes took in the scene.

Hinata swallowed hard, finding it difficult to leave. He really wanted to stay. He gathered all of his thoughts and willpower as he crossed the room and pulled Komaeda for one last needy kiss before saying. “See you around, Komaeda.”

Leaning against the loving hand that was cupping his face, Komaeda smiled as he said, “See you around, Hinata-kun.”

* * *

Hinata first headed quickly to the washing room, right by the end of the hall to wash. Moreover, he had to rid himself of the obvious bulge he was carrying. Quickly, Hinata finished himself off in one of the cabins before heading to the sink.

As he thought of Komaeda, Hinata couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips, the light blush on his cheeks, and that fluttering feeling in his chest.

As he splashed water on his face, he looked up at the mirror and took few calming breaths to cool himself down.

Wiping his face with a towel, he then proceeded in running down the hallway as quickly as he could.

Just as he was turning in the hallway, he bumped into someone and fell back against the floor. Hinata groaned as he sat up and opened his eyes to look at who he bumped into.

Standing before him was a man dressed in a white suit, with white hair, and glaring eyes. The stance of authority and the look that man gave him made Hinata shiver with fear as the man squinted his eyes in observation.

“Boy, if you had the slightest consideration to the people sleeping, you wouldn't be running about in the hallway. Not to mention a bit of decency to at least be discreet about your attire.”

“W-what?” Hinata's eyes widened with dread. The knowing eyes the man gave him flipped Hinata's stomach and the next words the man uttered felt like a punch to the gut.

“If you have the slightest courtesy to the parents who raised you, you wouldn't be acting indecently behind their backs.”

Clutching his fists, Hinata glared at the stranger with fury as the man scornfully turned around and walked away. Hinata picked himself up from the floor and glared angrily at the man as he disappeared from view.

Rage filled his heart but there was no time to stay there idly. Hinata quickly turned and headed to his room.

As he reached for the door and opened it, he stopped dead in his tracks as his mother stood before him.

“Hajime...? Where were you?”

“The…” Hinata cleared his voice as he said, “...the washing room.”

“And why are you out of breath?”

“I…” Hinata started to panic as he tried to come up with a quick lie. He was cut off his thoughts when his mother exclaimed.

“Oh, Hajime! Did you sleep with your clothes on last night? You know how expensive these clothes are.”

His mother tried to straighten his shirt and looked really upset at how wrinkled it has become. Hinata looked at her and silently wondered what kind of look she would have if she ever learned of his... newfound affair?

The thought alone had his heart hammering in his chest.

Suddenly the words of the stranger struck him and he felt a pang of guilt tugging at his heart.

“Hajime?”

Hinata was pulled out of his thoughts when she placed her hand on his face, “Are you alright, dear?”

Hinata cleared his throat and smiled as he leaned against her warm hand and smiled. “I’m alright, mother. I… I was really tired yesterday and I passed out. I'm… I'm sorry.”

That tug at his heart squeezed at him as he said those last two words. Part of him felt he was apologizing for hiding the truth from her. Hinata looked away as he continued saying, “... It was a very long night.”

Somehow Hinata couldn't meet her gaze but regardless she smiled and caressed him on the cheek. “Oh well, enough of that. Just go get dressed. We don't want to be late. You can tell me all about it during breakfast.”

Hinata nervously swallowed as he nodded. He then watched her go to the other room to wake his father. He closed the door and sighed as he took off his loosened tie. That tightening feeling in his chest irked at him. What was it?

Shame? No … although he felt he should, else he was in denial.  
Guilt? Maybe … for hiding the truth.  
Scared? Definitely …  
Regret? No … Because he was in love with Komaeda.

_Love? ..._

Hinata looked up at his reflection in the mirror and found his cheeks burning softly.

_Is this what love feels like, with all these mixed emotions…?_

He asked himself quietly as his mind wandered.

It was perplexing, how he felt for him, for Komaeda. And although he was just with him, he longed for him, to see him, to hold him, and to touch him.

These feelings that should have been reserved for a girl to love and marry… start a family with, and… live a normal life.

Because… _they_ would never accept otherwise.

Hinata shook his head angrily.

There shouldn't be any shame in the way he felt towards Komaeda. So what if he was a man? It shouldn't be wrong if his feelings beated this strongly and sincerely. If they poured with so much emotion, then it was the society that was in the wrong! They could never understand.

They would... tear them apart… call him a sinner...

Hinata clutched his fists as he argued with himself. His mind thought of turning back; that it wasn't too late, but instead, he shook his head one more time and determinedly looked at himself in the mirror.

The experienced they had last night, the genuine passion they felt for each other, was beautiful and deep and… he could have never experienced that with any other. Being with him and no other was all that mattered. His heart had already fallen so, so deep.

_Wouldn't you have rather wanted your first with a girl, Hinata-kun, or... did it feel good, .. inside me?_

Hinata's cheeks burned as he felt a stir in his heart.

He then wondered if Komaeda was feeling conflicted as he was.

Regardless, he was looking forward to meeting Komaeda again.

* * *

As Hinata and his parents sat quietly around the table, his thoughts kept wandering to Komaeda. That is, until his mother exclaimed excitedly, “Hajime, tell us about last night.”

Hinata’s heart jolted until he realized what she had actually meant. He spoke, choosing carefully what to say, “Oh, uhmm… a lot happened… I _suppose_.”

“Which of the elites have you spoken with?” His father asked.

Hinata nervously chewed on his lips as images of Komaeda filled his mind, starting with the jealousy, the outburst, his confession, and finally when _they_ -...

“Hajime?”

Snapping back to the real world, he looked over his mother.

“Are you okay, son? You look rather pale.” His father exclaimed.

Hinata cleared his throat nervously, “I-l'm fine. I…” He then took a deep breath before he continued saying, “I spent the evening with Nanami. We talked, danced, and played together some of her games. She’s the elite gamer after all. We really had... a good time.”

Leaving parts of Komaeda out of the story, Hinata gave a small smile as his parents rejoiced and he couldn’t help but feel his heart tug once again.

“How do you feel towards her, Hajime?”

Hinata's stared at his mother as she looked at him with a knowing eye.

“How do I _feel_?” Hinata squinted his eyes and snatched them away as he thought about it. She was very sweet, kind, and pretty. He did feel the most comfortable around her and she had the sweetest smile and this _warmth_ about her. If he hadn't already fallen for someone else then maybe he would...

Hinata swallowed the feelings building up in his throat as conflict resided in his chest. He looked at his mother and said, “I don’t know yet but she's quite lovely, mother.”

“Oh, Hajime. If the heavens shined upon you and fate brought you two together, then that would make me the happiest mother of all. I mean, to see you flying off to your future with a beautiful woman in your arms. Then to start a family, have children. Sounds so very wonderful, isn’t that right, dear?”

His father nodded.

Hinata smiled but soon faded as he played around with his fork and stared sadly down at his plate. He knew it would feel this way.

As he felt a strange disturbance in his chest, his conscious swarmed him with questions. _If he were to ever change his heart, if he hadn't met Komaeda, if he hadn't confessed, if he hadn't given in, he would still be able to live a happy, normal life. Right? ...No! He was already happy being with him. What’s good in normal?_

The more Hinata spent time with him, the more Komaeda gave him a sense of purpose, enlightenment, a new way to view the world, encouraging him to take decisions of his own. The world unfolds before him. That's what he loved most about him.

Hinata sighed quietly before he averted his eyes around. Komaeda was nowhere around and it tugged at his heart. His eyes filled with longing and he silently wondered if he had gone back to sleep. Would Komaeda come to the morning assembly? If he didn’t, should Hinata visit him? It felt so awkward just thinking about these trivial matters and it was absurd how despite their triviality, his heart couldn't stop hammering in his chest.

Were they then considered lovers?

Hinata's cheeks heated heavily at the thought.

* * *

As Hinata finished breakfast, he headed directly to the lounge.

The moment he walked into the room, his eyes searched for Komaeda and felt rather disappointed when he didn't find him. It saddened him that he might not make it after all.

“Hinata-kun?”

Hinata turned around to see Mikan at the doorway. He gave her a small smile and said, “Tsumiki-san, good morning.”

She blushed as she pulled her gaze down to the floor, “G-Good morning.”

Hinata felt he should apologize since he did pull Komaeda away from her in a mix of rage and jealousy.

As he looked at her, he awkwardly scratched his cheek as he said, “Uhmm, about yesterday, sorry for pulling Komaeda away and scaring you like that.”

“No, uhmm, i-it’s okay. D-Don't worry about it.”

Hinata gave her half a nod and gazed awkwardly the other way as she passed by him.

Hinata came to realize that because of his jealousy towards them, he had confessed his feelings to Komaeda. If it weren't for that, he would have still stayed in the dark about his feelings.

 _So was it a good thing it happened?_ He wondered.

“Good Morning, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata turned his head to see Nanami and smiled warmly at her. “Oh, Nanami. Morning.”

“Do you feel better today?

When Hinata gave her a confused look, she elaborated by saying, “Last night, you turned pale then left so suddenly.”

“Oh, yes. Uhm, s-sorry about that.”

When Nanami leaned towards him with a suspicious, unmoving gaze, Hinata blinked and took a step back. He couldn’t help but blush lightly because of the close proximity.

After a while, she finally stepped back down with a smile and said, “Would you like to play a game with me?”

“Uhm, s-sure.” Hinata’s blush spread across his cheeks when Nanami held his hand and pulled him inside the room.

Her hand felt very soft.

Time passed soundly and Hinata found himself in the company of other elites. He was beginning to blend in rather well with them as if he has become one of them. But he would still rather be in the company of Komaeda and this gave him the opportunity to get to know them better.

Chattering filled the room. Ibuki played the violin although she tended to get a bit loud with the music. Sonia spoke of her country's affairs and how she, as part of the royal family, intended to build a strong foundation for her people. Souda talked about his dreams for future automated cars. Hanamura announced he’d be supervising a dinner party that night in celebration of his new chain of restaurants and advised them to eat lightly during lunch.

Everyone had a story to tell, unlike him. Hinata couldn't help but feel resentment towards his own incapability. He wished to be just like them, one with an extraordinary talent.

With the hours passing by, there was still no sign of Komaeda and that made Hinata feel lonely despite being surrounded by many people. What a strange feeling that was?

Hinata looked over some of the elite girls when he heard something that sparked his interest.

“Aren’t we missing someone?” Akane pointed out.

“U-Uhm, Komaeda i-isn't here.” Mikan shyly said.

Some of them cringed at the mere mentioning of Komaeda's name. Hinata didn't understand the reason for such a reaction.

“How odd. He never misses these assemblies,” said Koizumi.

“Should someone check up on him?” Sonia wondered.

“Who cares?” Saionji replied back.

“Why are we talking about that creep anyway?” said Kuzuryuu’s sister.

“I admit he doesn't really settle right with me,” Koizumi said.

Hinata glared their way and he couldn't help but feel his blood boil.

Saionji laughed as she said jokingly, “Maybe he fell overboard and drowned.”

Hinata couldn't take it anymore. He angrily smacked his hands down on the table and yelled, “You shouldn't be talking about him like that!”

Hinata's outburst turned heads his way, catching the attention of those around him, especially Nanami. Some of them looked at each other confused as to why anyone would be so defensive over Komaeda.

Kuzuryuu crossed his arms and said, “Hinata, was it? It's in your damn interest to keep your distance away from him.”

Tension grew thick as Hinata glared back at him, Souda intervened by cutting in between them and said, “I don’t get why you’re so defensive but you probably haven’t gotten to know Komaeda yet. His _luck_. Something always goes wrong when you're around him.”

Saionji snickered as she muttered, “Although I’d believe your misfortunes were the result of your own stupidity.” When Souda glared at her furiously, she turned around and whistled nonchalantly.

Mikan blushed as she said, “I- think he's r-really nice a-and- _Eek!_ ”

“Shut up, pig! No one asked you.” Saionji cut in.

“I-I’m so sorry!” Mikan bursted out crying.

As the argument heated with tension, Ibuki turned to Nanami and saw her in thought “What are you thinking, Nanami?” She asked.

Everyone fell quiet before Nanami hummed and said, “I think we should be nice towards Komaeda. He shouldn't be treated differently because of his talent nor because of the way he puts his faith and hope in us. We should all come together and put aside our differences, to accept him as we accept each other, I think.”

Ibuki's eyes sparkled as she smiled eagerly, “Yes, yes, Ibuki thinks so too.”

Nidai expressed how moved he felt and as a team manager, he admired the spirit Nanami had while Akane laughed at his sentimental outburst.

Sonia closed her eyes and smiled, “Nanami-san is right. We should treat Komaeda with more kindness.”

Souda looked at Sonia and frowned, seemingly feeling a little ashamed of himself.

Hinata stood there, captivated and in awe at how she managed to change the situation with just a few words. Everyone around either felt ashamed or sat there quietly contemplating her words.

Hinata wondered silently if the elites knew about Komaeda illness. Did Komaeda ever tell them about it? Maybe if they did, they would feel some bit of compassion for him. Regardless, his admiration grew towards Nanami. He felt very touched by her words, how sincere they were. He smiled warmly as gazed at her as Nanami turned to him and smiled warmly back.

They stared at each other with smiles painted on their lips.

Suddenly, behind her, Komaeda came to sight as he walked through the doors and his heart jumped at the very sight of him.

“Speak of the devil.” Saionji murmured.

Komaeda excitedly approached the elites with a smile and Hinata couldn’t suppress the giddy feeling in his heart nor the feeling of butterflies tickling in his stomach.

Sonia approached him and greeted him with a smile, “Good morning, Komaeda-san.”

Komaeda smiled back and greeted her warmly. Upon that, Souda spoke up as he attempted to open conversation, “Hey.”

“Oh, Souda-kun, good morning.”

“Mornin’. What took you so long? You’re always early on these assemblies, but today you’re late. You should have joined us.”

Komaeda blinked, seemingly surprised. He squinted his eyes and smiled joyfully, “Oh, I apologize for worrying everyone.”

“Tripped on something again?” Souda joked.

Komaeda chuckled, “No but you see, I had trouble getting out of bed this morning.”

“Oh? Don't miss out again.”

Komaeda smiled warmly as he nodded.

Sonia looked at Souda with a smile, and in return, Souda blushed and scratched his head rather shyly.

Nanami and Mikan went over to talk to him and probably few others, but Hinata stood in place.

Because Komaeda had said the words so casually, Hinata’s heart skipped and his cheeks flared. When Komaeda turned and looked at him with a smile, Hinata pulled his gaze away and covered his lower face with his hand to hide his obvious blush. He could clearly hear the beats of his heart pounding so strongly inside his chest.

_Badum, badum, badum, badum…_

It was alarming how easily Komaeda could do this to him. When he gazed back, Komaeda was casually talking with the rest and Hinata's eyes lowered as he stared at him lovingly.

“Gross,” Saionji said with distaste.

Hinata turned his gaze to her in question.

When she looked up at him, she squinted her eyes and hid half of her face behind the sleeve of her kimono as she said, “What’s with that look?”

He blinked. “What look?”

“That look.” She said pointedly with a cheeky smile. “You’re gazing in that direction with a very disgusting look on your face.”

“...” Hinata didn’t know how to react to that but to humor her he asked, “What do you mean?”

“That look when you look at someone you like or love or something lame as that.”

“W-what?”

She smirked condescendingly at his stammering.

Hinata blurted out. “That’s not true.”

“Oh?” Saionji peaked behind him, “So who is it then? Is it Nanami? Ibuki? Or that _pig_?” She didn't bother to mention Mikan by her name and he wondered why she constantly belittled her like that. Her eyes glinted suddenly as she snickered playfully before saying, “Or perhaps… _Komaeda_ ~?”

Alarmed, Hinata put his hands up in defense. “W-what are you saying?”

“Am I right? Am I right?” She said dauntingly, snickering some more.

Hinata's reaction only made her laugh.

“That’s not funny.”

Akane walked to the two laughing and tugged Hinata’s tie playfully. “Relax. Saionji is just pulling your strings.”

“Ahw, don't ruin the fun.” Saionji pouted her lips.

Hinata fixed his tie as he looked away, feeling flustered and a bit angry. Even if it was a joke, it didn't stop his heart from having a minor heart attack. Although, she was completely on point.

When Hinata turned and looked at Komaeda, watching him talk with that warm smile on his face, Hinata couldn't help but feel captivated by him. He was truly beautiful.

Soon after, Hinata noticed Komaeda head for the railings outside. He quickly followed him and as he closed the gap between them, the butterflies continued to flutter strongly in his stomach.

Komaeda looked at him and smiled as Hinata bent down on the railings next to him and for a few seconds, they quietly gazed upon the sea before them. Hinata turned his head and bashfully asked, “How are you feeling now?”

Komaeda turned and tilted his head in a clueless manner with that smile still adorning his face. He surely did enjoy feigning innocence just to pull at Hinata's stings, or that's what Hinata felt anyways.

“Do you mean about this morning?”

The look that Komaeda gave him had Hinata’s cheeks burning which brought further amusement to Komaeda. He then leaned closer to Hinata's ear and whispered, “Since you left, I couldn’t stop touching myself, Hinata-kun.”

Shivers ran down his ear from where Komaeda had whispered. Komaeda chuckled softly as he saw the look of embarrassed bafflement upon Hinata’s face.

Komaeda did enjoy this. He then proceeded to ask, “Would you like to have a walk with me, Hinata-kun?”

* * *

So much time has passed as they walked along on the promenade deck. Like their usual pastime, Hinata listened to the stories Komaeda had picked up from books. It was fascinating how much he knew about the world. Then a thought came to mind.

_… How lonely must Komaeda have felt to fill his time with books?_

“Have you heard of Jabberwock island, Hinata-kun?

“Jabberwock island?”

“It’s an archipelago, consisting of five bigger islands connected by a smaller, central island, located in the Pacific Ocean. A true paradise of everlasting summer with natural beauty.”

“Oh? No, I haven't. It sounds like a beautiful place.”

“Would you be interested in going there, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata looked at Komaeda as he thought about it. Visiting the island together with Komaeda, all to explore a secluded paradise just the two of them, sounds like it would make a wonderful getaway.

“I would.” 

Komaeda's eyes squinted in thought as the smile made its way to his lips.

“But why are you interested in it?” Hinata asked.

“Because of the many rumors surrounding it. The Killing School Trip.”

“W-what is that?”

“A group of students was sent there on a trip. Stranded on the island and being taken over by fear and desperation, they started killing each other. Some died in very brutal ways.”

Hinata’s eyes widened as a creepy smile crept on Komaeda's face.

“Isn’t it fascinating, Hinata-kun? Thinking of the sorrow the students had to go through, their relinquished hope buried deep enough but not too deep that they won’t think to dig from the within the ashes. Think of their anguish and their cries of betrayal. How beautiful it must have been, to see hope shine its brightest at the pits of despair.”

Hinata stood there shocked as a bead of sweat trickled down his forehead.

Komaeda's eyes turned hollow, cold and lonely as he stared in the far distance of the sea as he said, “Imagining myself as one of the students, I imagine my death to be the most brutal of all.”

With his back against the passing passengers, Hinata swallowed hard as his throat clamped and his eyes widened with mortification.

All warnings urged Hinata to run away, but instead, he clutched his fists and his eyes squinted with grief. “....You think about death a lot, don't you, Komaeda?”

Komaeda turned his head and with that blank, hollow expression, he looked at Hinata with a solemn gaze. He then leaned closer, making Hinata take one step back as Komaeda raised his finger and lifted his chin.

“Don't you, Hinata-kun?” Komaeda's voice was dark and cold as he slid his finger down Hinata's throat and pressed lightly against his Adam's apple.

Hinata's eyes widened as he swallowed nervously, as he was firmly gripped with fear.

Komaeda’s smile grew and his eyes squinted dangerously when his finger continued to slide down Hinata's body until it reached his groin.

Horrified, Hinata looked down at the finger brushing softly against him in teasing circles.

“Am I turning you on, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata pursed his lips as Komaeda gently stroked over his groin. Fearing someone might see them, Hinata quickly grabbed Komaeda’s hand.

When Komaeda perked his cold eyes up with that same creepy smile plastered on his face, Hinata felt chills all over his body.

It was bewildering how aroused Hinata had become from such a grotesque discussion.

But seeing the void in those pale-green eyes, Hinata couldn’t help but feel his heart hollowing in dissolution. Just how much trauma has Komaeda gone through?

Living with the knowledge that his illness could rob his life at any given moment…

Hinata looked straight into his eyes and said, “Death is inevitable, that’s why we make the most out of living, Komaeda. To make every second count.” His grip on Komaeda's hand tightened as he spoke with all sincerity, “And I've never been as alive as when I am with you.”

Slowly, the glow returned to Komaeda’s eyes. Hinata gently leaned in and spoke in whispers against his face, “... and if I were to die, then the hope you've planted in me never will.”

Komaeda’s eyes widened as the glow in them danced.

Hinata caressed his hand with his thumb as he said, “But I'd rather spend my days with you, Komaeda, clinging to hope. _Together_. Wouldn't you too?”

When Hinata saw the warmth return in those pale-green eyes, he smiled lovingly and blushed when that warm smile graced those thin lips once again.

“I'd love that, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata's eyes glistened with passion and he felt frustrated that he couldn't just lean forward and kiss him.

Hearing music playing in the distance, the musicians have picked up a tune that had Hinata still as he stared into the distance where the music was being played.

Komaeda tilted his head in question, “What is it, Hinata-kun?”

“That tune… it had played during the ball…”

When Komaeda didn't recall, Hinata smiled with a saddened expression and continued saying, “The one where you and Tsumiki-san danced on.”

When Hinata fell silent, Komaeda looked concerned. “Hinata-kun?”

“Sorry, it's just… when I saw you two dancing together, I …” When Hinata saw the look Komaeda gave him, he shrugged bashfully and said, “I felt envious. I wanted to pull you away from her.”

When Komaeda looked surprised, Hinata felt more embarrassed as he continued saying, “I felt like the whole world was crashing down on me. I tried to keep myself away from you and spend that night with someone else. Preferably a girl, like my parents wanted me to. Doing what I was told to do, what I _should_ still be doing, I feel confined. Just like I am now because I can't kiss you.”

Komaeda gazed into Hinata's eyes as Hinata leaned close enough to whisper, “Seeing you with her, that's when I realized how I felt about you, how I still do.”

“Hinata-kun…”

Hinata gazed down and laughed quietly at himself, “I acted with jealousy because I wanted to be the one who danced with you. Isn't that foolish of me?”

After a short silence, Komaeda smiled warmly and said, “If that’s what you want then would you like to dance with me, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata looked surprised. When he looked behind at the people passing behind them, Komaeda cupped his cheek and made Hinata look at him, “What do you say?”

Hinata’s cheeks burned as he stared into Komaeda’s eyes.

“Yes.” Hinata bashfully replied.

“Then come with me, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata blushed at the notion of people watching them holding hands as Komaeda pulled him along, but it was these little moments that made Hinata feel happiest the most.

* * *

Hinata’s mother walked on deck in search of her son but he was nowhere to be found.

“Oh, where did Hinata disappear to now?”

Suddenly someone came up to her and Hinata's mother turned to find a girl she recalled as Koizumi.

“Oh, good evening dear.”

“Good evening. I was searching for you.”

“Oh?”

“Here, I wanted to give you this. It’s the picture I took the other day.”

“My, this is lovely. Thank you very much. I’ll make sure to show it to Hajime.” She paused seeming to think it over before adding in, “By the way, have you seen him?”

“Hmmm… I think I saw him leaving with Komaeda earlier.”

“Do you perhaps know where he is now?”

Koizumi shook her head and Hinata’s mother sighed. “Well, thank you, dear. Send my warmest regards to your mother.”

“I will.”

As she turned and left, Hinata’s mother went back to her husband and sat beside him.

“Did you find him?”

“No.” After some thought, she asked, “Dear, don’t you think Hajime has been acting a bit odd lately?"

"How so?" her husband replied.

"Oh, I don't know.” As she stared out at the open sea in contemplation, she offhandedly remarked, “Do you think we are pushing him too far?"

"Darling, we’ve talked about this. We are doing this for his own good and for the good name of our family." He said as he smoked his pipe and held up the newspaper.

"I know, I know. I just can't help the feeling that my own son is slipping away from me. The more time passes, the more he grows to be the fine young man that he is, the more I feel his heart is growing distant."

Without removing his gaze from the newspaper, he said, "He's fine, dear. Soon enough, as we reach the new world, we can start a new life, a new beginning. I have no doubt that Hajime will make us proud. Have more faith in him."

She smiled as she looked down at the picture and her smile grew warmer. “You’re right, dear.”

* * *

Back to Komaeda's room, Hinata felt butterflies fluttering in his stomach.

Komaeda took off his suit jacket and so did Hinata and placed them on the couch. The sunlight illuminated the room with its beautiful rays, painting the room with warm colors.

Komaeda turned to Hinata and gave him his hand.

Hinata looked confused for a moment before taking it. Komaeda then lifted Hinata’s other hand to his waist then placed his hand on Hinata's shoulder. Komaeda pulled Hinata across the room while he softly hummed the tune.

A smile slowly made its way to Hinata’s lips as he took the lead.

Swaying swiftly across the room, back and forth, their smiles beamed warmly on their faces as their hums filled the atmosphere.

Hinata found himself chuckling softly and Komaeda shared the laughter in warm breaths as he moved his hand closer to the nook of Hinata’s neck.

Slowly, Hinata’s laughter quieted down. He pulled Komaeda closer and leaned against his forehead. Their swaying slowed down until their hums turned silent.

Their eyes connected for a brief moment before they lowered their gazes. Hinata breathed out softly and closed his eyes to relish the moment. He didn’t realize they had stopped dancing. Looking back into those pale-green eyes, Hinata pulled his hand up from Komaeda’s waist and cradled the side of his beautiful face.

Komaeda’s eyes squinted warmly as Hinata pulled him gently towards his lips for a kiss.

Their lips lingered before they pulled back slowly and stared into each other's eyes for a brief moment.

Hinata felt the warmth spread across his chest when he closed in for another kiss and heard Komaeda breathe warmly through his nose. One kiss after the other, Komaeda’s lips slowly slipped from Hinata’s own before being pulled in again by needy lips.

Komaeda wrapped his arms around his neck, his hand raking into Hinata's hair, deepening the kiss further. In return, Hinata pulled one hand up to hold the side of Komaeda’s neck as he nipped on his lips, the other roamed over his back, pulling him closer.

Hinata broke the kiss with a soft pop when he felt Komaeda’s half-hard bulge press against his own. He saw the way Komaeda smiled when he looked down at them and Hinata's cheeks flushed when he too saw how tented his bulge has become from just a simple kiss.

These feelings that throbbed in his heart were gushing through his very being. He could feel his heart reverberating inside his chest. What a lovely sensation that was and it was Komaeda who made him feel such raw emotions each and every time.

They sighed warmly as their lips drew closer without touching, just simply feeling the other's warmth. Hinata loved holding Komaeda close, feel his breath on his skin. As the sensations grew, Hinata wanted more, demanded more, to feel him against his own. Holding his waist, Hinata slowly moved his hips against him, making Komaeda moan softly as he placed his forehead on Hinata’s shoulder.

Hinata’s face was flushed deep as Komaeda breathed against his neck. His eyes lidded heavily as he held his frail body with affection. Feeling the girth underneath the clothes was sweet torture as it added more friction to his gently, shallow thrusts.

Suddenly, Hinata gasped when he was pushed back against the couch. He looked up in time to see Komaeda straddling him and hovering over his lips. His eyes widened as he saw the lust swimming in Komaeda’s pale-green eyes, heavily lidded with want, and felt those calloused fingers wrap tenderly around his neck.

Hinata’s eyes softened as a warm feeling resonated in his chest. “ _Komaeda_ …,” he whispered huskily.

Closing the short distance between their lips, Hinata pulled and grabbed his lower lip, biting down on it softly just to hear him moan.

Komaeda melted into the kiss before he started moving his own hips, humping and grinding their clothed crotches together.

Hinata broke away from the kiss, pushing his head back as he felt Komaeda’s bulge press against his. Feeling the heat coursing through him, he gave a soft groan, relishing in the sweet, slow friction.

Swishing his hair to the side and with his hands still on each side of Hinata's neck, Komaeda panted hotly against Hinata's mouth before he pressed his forehead down on his, his hair tickling softly against Hinata's skin, and his breaths warm and needy.

Hinata’s hands immediately cupped Komaeda’s ass in a possessive hold and moved his hips back to feel more of that sweet torturous friction. He could feel the heat mounting in his pants as their grinding turned desperate.

Their lips relentlessly latched with each other as the sounds of their heavy breaths and sloppy kisses echoed in the quiet room.

Hinata pulled his hand up and caressed Komaeda's hair back just to see his beautiful flushed face. Seeing the state Komaeda was in did wonders to his cock. He gave a throaty groan before pulling Komaeda down for a hard kiss while hastily pulling his shirt from under his pants to feel skin. He felt Komaeda shiver under his touch as he blatantly and heatedly moaned his name in a sinful whisper across his face, “ _Hinata-kun_ …”

Hinata swallowed hard and cradled his face before unabashedly admitting, “I want you… _more_ than anything.”

Komaeda’s eyes slanted down and his lips turned up into a smile as he leaned towards his ear and breathed the words, “You can have your way with me in any way you want, Hinata-kun.”

Blood rushed to Hinata's cock and he felt his face heat up hearing those lustful whispers in his ear.

Komaeda gently pulled back and slowly started unbuttoning his own shirt under Hinata’s intense gaze.

Hinata watched as calloused fingers moved to reveal that pale, flat chest. His eyes immediately settled on those rosy, puckered buds. He bit down on his lips to hold the desire of devouring those nipples in his mouth.

As the shirt slipped down from his bony shoulders, Komaeda pulled himself towards Hinata’s lips and breathed warmly through his nose between heated kisses.

Hinata immediately roamed his hands over that pale, smooth skin and sighed into Komaeda’s mouth.

Komaeda pulled back inches away before he whispered seductively, “Your turn, Hinata-kun.”

Still in a daze, Hinata took a moment before his brain registered the words. Feeling rushed, he grabbed his shirt from the bottom and took it off in one go before throwing it aside. Komaeda chuckled softly through his nose before Hinata gently grabbed him by the neck and pulled him back down to his lips.

Komaeda moaned into the kiss as his pale hands roamed over that firm chest. Meanwhile, Hinata traced his hands towards the front of Komaeda’s pants and started unbuckling, pulling the zipper down.

Komaeda broke away from Hinata's mouth and stood on his knees. Hinata took the hint and pulled his pants down, thus revealing his cock that stood eagerly against the thin fabric of the undergarment. Hinata gazed lovingly at the slender girth and felt a slight twitch to his own cock.

Komaeda smiled before his hand traveled to the front of Hinata's pants and groped his tented bulge, pulling a shudder out of Hinata's lips, and whispered in his ear, “You’re hard, Hinata-kun.”

Komaeda didn’t waste time in unbuckling and opening the front of Hinata’s pants.

“Komaeda…” came a desperate hiss as Hinata felt himself stain the front of the thin-layered fabric when Komaeda stroked along his length.

Hinata groaned softly before he palmed Komaeda’s exposed plump cheeks, pressing his fingers down on that soft flesh and kneading them gently. He then tapped Komaeda twice and dipped his fingers inside his undergarment, making him stand on his knees once again before Hinata pulled it down.

Seeing Komaeda flushed and erect had Hinata salivating and melting from within.

Komaeda’s breath shivered as Hinata closed his hand around his cock, stroking along its length and coating it with the essence drizzling from the slit. Komaeda couldn’t help groaning softly before bucking into Hinata’s hand but it was proving hard to move with his pants still on.

After momentarily lifting himself to get rid of his pants and undergarment, Komaeda settled down against Hinata’s lap, occupying his mouth with relentless kisses while Hinata resumed stroking him, causing wet, squishing sounds against his hand.

The essence flared into the air, filling Hinata’s nostrils and filling his heart with ravenous inclination. His eyes broke away from Komaeda’s cock and settled on his hardened nipple. Hinata pulled him eagerly, slamming that puckered nipple into his hungry mouth while his free hand kneaded his plump cheek.

Komaeda curled his toes and pushed his head back as his nipple got devoured by Hinata’s mouth. He wrapped his arms around Hinata’s head and moaned while his body clenched and tightened from the overwhelming sensations.

Suddenly, Komaeda sucked in a breath when Hinata dragged his fingers between his ass cheeks. Hinata gently pressed against the entrance, turning Komaeda into a panting mess.

Komaeda clutched Hinata’s shoulders while his body trembled and his ass clenched again and again against Hinata’s teasing fingers.

“Hi- _Hinata-kun_ …”

That was it. Hinata couldn’t restrain himself any longer.

Komaeda yelped when he suddenly found himself being lifted. He was taken by surprise at Hinata’s unexpected strength as he was gently pushed down against the mattress over the pile of pillows. Hinata hastily took off his pants and undergarment before climbing the bed and hovering over Komaeda’s parted lips.

Komaeda’s eyes were wide as he gazed into Hinata’s wanting eyes.

 _How beautiful,_ Hinata thought as he gazed back. Everything about Komaeda was magnetic and… _intoxicating_.

Komaeda’s eyes softened as he stared back mesmerized, running his calloused fingers down on Hinata’s toned chest before his eyes settled between their bodies on the dangled cock; thick and erect. His breath shivered as he looked into Hinata’s eyes and coaxed him to lean closer before their lips crashed with one another.

Their chests rubbed against each other as Hinata dragged his lips towards Komaeda’s neck. Suckling gently on his smooth skin, Hinata dipped further down, placing warm, lush kisses on his pale chest, then pulled the puckered nipple into his mouth for a gentle suck. Komaeda moaned, arching his back and eagerly parting his legs to make way for him as Hinata traveled further down his body.

Komaeda gave out a sharp gasp, pulling his stomach back when Hinata’s pushed the tip of his tongue into his belly button.

Doing it again, Hinata smiled when he was able to draw a soft laughter from Komaeda’s lips. He then placed a soft kiss on his stomach before his eyes slanted down towards Komaeda’s cock.

Smelling the heady and potent scent of Komaeda’s arousal, Hinata pulled back and stared lovingly at the flushed cock dripping lusciously with precum. Placing his fingers around that cock, Hinata gave few lazy strokes before daringly taking an experimenting lick along its length.

Komaeda sucked in a surprised breath as Hinata dragged his tongue up to the slit and into his mouth. Hinata didn’t know what to make of the taste nor of its texture, but its essence drove him wild with craze. Watching Komaeda gave him the biggest thrill of all. Feeling very lewd with himself, he listened to him moan while he continued licking and slurping his cock.

Clutching the sheets tightly, Komaeda threw his head back and sucked in a heavy breath as more delicious moans escaped his lips.

Hinata’s eyes filled with lust as he watched what has become of Komaeda. He eagerly wrapped his mouth around the mushroom head, pushing the cock between his lips and into his mouth, sucking along his length in a gentle and slow rhythm. The feeling of Komaeda’s cock against his tongue, the head hitting the back of his throat, filling his mouth, was an experience he never thought he’d have before and he loved every moment of it. He relished in the moans getting suppressed inside Komaeda’s throat.

“Hinata-kun… d-doing this...I- _Ahh!._..mghh…”

Hinata could tell that Komaeda loved it because at that moment his hips jerked, staining the inside of his fiery mouth with more of his juices. Komaeda held Hinata’s head and clutched on his hair strands as Hinata eagerly bobbed his head between his legs, taking more of him in, sucking and slurping until Komaeda lost the sense of his body and unconsciously started giving short thrusts inside Hinata’s mouth.

“ _Ngghhh…, Hinata-kun...”_

Hinata pulled back slowly as Komaeda’s cock slipped from his mouth, a string of heavy saliva and precum thinning out before the cock slapped gently back against Komaeda’s heaving stomach.

As Hinata licked his lips, he dragged his hands down that frail body, feeling it shiver under his touch while he listened to Komaeda's unsteady breathing. He gently tweaked his puckered bud, drawing a sharp gasp, before exploring the rest of his body, memorizing every sensitive spot there was.

Komaeda arched his back lewdly and whimpered when Hinata slid his fingers down towards his entrance. He exasperated loudly as Hinata’s fingers rubbed circles around the rim. Just the simplest touch had his body trembling.

Hinata’s eyes turned to slits, lust already building up in his throat as he breathed the words, "Does it still hurt or… does it feel good, Komaeda?”

Komaeda struggled to keep his voice even as his eyes dripped heavily with lust. Hinata was taken by surprise when Komaeda pulled him with a sudden force and smashed his lips with his. Hinata groaned, kissing him with much fervent passion while he continued rubbing gently around his throbbing entrance. Komaeda whispered in hefty breaths as he moaned against Hinata’s mouth, “It doesn't matter what you do to me, Hinata-kun. Not even if you turned me into a mess.”

Hinata’s cheeks flushed deep, his eyes widened until his pupils dilated with arousal. He pulled back and looked deep into Komaeda’s eyes before they settled on the tight ring of muscles and asked gently, “Not even… if I do this?” Hinata pressed his thumb against the entrance, drawing a sharp moan from Komaeda’s lips.

Hinata's name trembled on Komaeda’s lips before his legs were pushed back, “Hinata-kun, what are you-... _Ahhh!”_

The rest of Komaeda's words choked in his throat when Hinata bent down and licked and swirled his tongue around the entrance. Hinata was surprised at himself for licking at such a place and it must have surprised Komaeda even more.

In a startled broken voice, Komaeda tried to call Hinata’s name.

“Hi...Hina.. _A-Ah!”_

With one hand pushing Komaeda's leg back, Hinata licked vigorously against that hole before brushing his thumb on it and softly gazed at it. It was glistening with saliva and throbbing prominently before his eyes. Hinata smiled as he pushed his thumb inside.

Komaeda immediately tensed and arched his back at the sudden intrusion.

“A-Ahhh…. _nggghhh_ …” Komaeda bit his lip as Hinata moved the thumb inside of him.

Hinata loved the way the hole pulsed and throbbed. He then pulled his hand and used it to push Komaeda’s other leg back, making the hole stretch. Hinata vigorously and mercilessly resumed licking around the rim just to drive him mad.

Komaeda pressed his hand against his mouth and closed his eyes tight when Hinata pushed his tongue inside him. He thrashed his head around and panted heavily as he tried to control the trembling of his body. The wetness of Hinata's tongue inside him made Komaeda's breathing difficult as tears stung his eyes and had him stammering.

“H-Hinata-kun _, d-don't_. Not t-there. T-That’s.. _Ah!_ ” Komaeda cried in pleasure when Hinata stubbornly thrusted his tongue inside of him. Komaeda had his eyes shut tight as his hips gave small jolts.

Suddenly, Hinata pulled himself up, allowing for Komaeda's legs to relax.

Hinata chuckled softly before he spoke in a husky voice, “I’m not done with you yet, Komaeda.”

Still feeling dazed and unable to catch his breath, Komaeda looked at Hinata who reached out for the bottle of lube standing on the bedside then poured a hefty amount on his fingers. A smile reached Komaeda’s lips as he saw the slick fingers make their way to his entrance. Komaeda shivered visibly before Hinata pushed his middle finger into the tight ring of muscles.

Komaeda arched his back as Hinata pushed his finger deeper. Slowly, another finger was added inside of him.

Hovering over Komaeda while pulling his fingers in and out of him, Hinata sighed heavily as he felt Komaeda’s delicious heat and the walls pushing tightly against his prodding fingers. He tried to be gentle as much as he could while scissoring him.

Komaeda clutched onto Hinata desperately and closed his eyes to feel Hinata’s fingers move inside him, stretching him. Hinata continued to defile and breach his hole before Komaeda moaned loudly and his legs jerked when those fingers barely brushed over his inner gland.

“D-Deeper…” Komaeda keened softly against his lips.

Nothing could be more enticing that hearing the sweet voices coming deep down from Komaeda's throat as he pushed his fingers deeper. Komaeda arched into his touch when Hinata rammed against that sensitive spot again and again. He thrashed his head around and moaned heatedly with his mouth open whenever his body had a surge of pleasure course through him. Hinata could feel it in the way the ass throbbed and muscles clenched around his fingers.

Driven nearer to his carnal instincts, Hinata smashed their lips together, lasciviously kissing him. Hinata gave a heavy groan as the walls deliciously squeezed around his fingers.

Without warning, Hinata pulled his fingers back and tried to restrain himself as he took deep breaths while he hovered over Komaeda.

Komaeda's chest heaved with air as he tried to make sense of himself. Hinata combed the sweaty strands back from Komaeda’s forehead to have a good look at his flushed face. Hinata got a little breathless at the sight of him.

Komaeda stared lovingly into Hinata’s eyes and brushed the tip of his fingers on those lips that pleasured him so.

In an instant, their lips joined in a messy and sloppy kiss. Komaeda pressed his hand against Hinata's neck and moaned into his mouth, barely pulling back enough to whisper. “ _Please_ …”

“...Won't… it be too much, Komaeda? You’re still sore.”

“Then, do me gently, Hinata-kun.” Komaeda's voice was shaking near the end with excitement or desperation or both.

Unconsciously, Hinata licked his lips as he tried to restrain his raging hormones. It was getting harder to control himself and his aching need but he was still cautious of not wanting to hurt Komaeda. “Are you sure?”

Komaeda nodded eagerly as Hinata reluctantly reached out for the bottle of lube. After pouring a sufficient amount on his cock, he placed himself in position and still hesitated.

Suddenly, Hinata was flipped on his back and Komaeda climbed over. Hinata gasped as Komaeda pinned him down with a lewd smile on his face.

“K-Komaeda?” Hinata gazed up with fascination as Komaeda grabbed Hinata’s cock and gave it a few strokes before pulling himself up and placing the head right under his hole. Bracing himself, he looked straight down into Hinata’s stunned expression before he pushed himself down.

“No, wait, Komae- _gahhh!"_

Komaeda shuddered as the head breached the tight ring of muscles but he continued to lower himself further. Hinata threw his head back and groaned loudly, back arching, eyes closed as he felt his own cock push against tight walls.

“K-Komaeda…” Hinata moaned as his body trembled.

Komaeda chose that moment to pull up, the drag of his cock languid and smooth against the walls of his insides until the head was caught on the rim of Komaeda’s hole. And then he thrusted back in a single, deep stroke.

The action tore a groan from Hinata’s throat, unprepared as he was. But when he opened his mouth to warn him from pushing himself, all breath left him in a heated rush when that ass slammed down on him once again, surrounding him with that pulsing, throbbing heat that engulfed him up completely.

Komaeda looked amused as he raised his hips again, placing his hands on Hinata’s thighs and leaned forward slightly, watching Hinata’s reaction as he lewdly moaned. The new position shifted the push of the cock inside him, turning his moans into short and sharp, breathless cries as he slammed himself back down.

"H-Hinata-kun!" Komaeda cried out from the friction, the wave of heat cutting through his very being.

“Agh… aahh..” Hinata moaned as Komaeda fucked himself onto his cock at a steady pace.

Suddenly, Komaeda sat back, thrusting forcefully down as he moaned louder and relished as Hinata’s hot, throbbing cock rammed into him, deep and hard.

Hinata could never forget the heady feeling of having Komaeda ride him, wild and bare, a sight reserved for him and only him.

With a particularly indulgent thrust, Komaeda threw his head back, back arched so beautifully, and cried out as that cock hit him right on his prostate, the waves of pleasure so intense it rendered his eyesight void. Riding Hinata’s cock harder, his pace quickened, filling the room with vulgar, wet noises. Hinata wanted to reach forward and touch that cock that now danced erotically in front of him, but he was overwhelmed to do anything at all. He let himself get lost in the heat and pleasure.

Hinata’s world was flooded with the pleasure, the heat, and he swore they would be the end of him as Komaeda managed to suck out his very breath from his lungs.

“K-Komaeda... Oh, G-God!“ His voice strained.

Komaeda pushed himself up from his crouched position and looked straight down into Hinata’s face. “Hah, hah, does it feel good… Hinata-kun?” Komaeda spoke in a breathy, hoarse voice that was nearly driving Hinata towards the edge.

Hinata fought through the sudden mounting need to flip Komaeda over and fuck him mercilessly so he simply nodded.

Every time Komaeda was filled to the rim, he would just take a moment and ground his hips, making his cock torture his prostate with the movement. It’s almost as if he was trying to bury himself deeper into Hinata’s body, to dig deeper inside of himself to a place where only Hinata could fill and no one else.

When he felt Komaeda was slowing down, Hinata placed his fingers around his waist and bucked, surprising Komaeda with the sudden, penetrating thrust.

 _Slap, slap, slap…_ Hinata's heart banged with every thrust as Komaeda's mouth dripped with sensual panting and lewd moaning.

Hinata cupped Komaeda's ass cheeks while Komaeda bounced and rode his cock. Around and around, Komaeda slapped his ass down, taking the whole cock in as it rammed deep inside of him and out, again and again.

Komaeda's arms trembled and he had a hard time holding himself up. Sweat dripped from his forehead and he was now burning from the exertion. His panting breaths turned to groans and cries as he called out for Hinata’s name again and again.

Hinata then pushed his upper body up in a sitting position and held Komaeda in his arms as he vigorously continued ramming inside him. His hips thrusted up hard and fast, making Komaeda roll his eyes back in ecstasy.

Komaeda choked out a wanton cry as he held onto Hinata for dear life. He cried out at the sudden powerful slams of Hinata’s hips thrusting up inside of him.

Hinata's heart raced when he saw the expressions on Komaeda's face as he made love to him for the second time.

With every thrust, their breaths came in sync, their hearts beat together, their bodies united as one, thrusting deeper, harder, and closer to the edge. The room was filled with the sound of slick, wet noises and slapping skin, squelching with the noises of pleasure and need that vibrated in the air.

Komaeda buried his face onto Hinata’s shoulder and breathed hotly against his flesh, wrapping his legs around him as his arms held him tighter. His erratic moaning was a sign that he was close.

A bead of sweat trickled down Hinata’s forehead as his hips burned and started to falter in its rhythm, indicating he was close as well. He grabbed Komaeda’s plump cheeks and thrusted harder. With the scarce air Komaeda had in his lungs, he said with a voice so hoarse and broken, “I’m... _coming_ , Hi… nata… - _kun_.”

Hinata replied with a heavy grunt.

Suddenly, Komaeda clenched around Hinata’s cock as he dug his nails into his back, drawing red marks as he cried out in pleasure into Hinata’s ear. His cock convulsing erratically, spurting threads of milky white against Hinata’s stomach.

Hinata gave a throaty grunt, and with few more thrusts, he felt his balls tighten from the pressure that had built up. He groaned, almost shouting as he buried deep within Komaeda and bursted, spurting streams of cum inside of him till the last drop.

Komaeda’s body fell limp into his arms before Hinata fell back to the bed, trembling.

Their breathing, both rugged and exhausted, filled the room.

Warmth seeped from where they joined and it was Komaeda’s turn to moan when he realized how much Hinata had cummed inside of him. Lifting his hips up, they were parted with a debauched slick sound as Komaeda pulled himself off of Hinata’s cock.

Hinata stared at him with heat in his glazed green eyes as Komaeda crawled up his body, eyes burning with lust and intent as he buried himself in Hinata’s arms.

Exhausted and spent, they basked into the afterglow as their breathing slowly fell back to normal rhythm.

They laid there for who knows how long but Hinata simply enjoyed the warmth of Komaeda’s body in his arms, the warm gaze from his eyes, the soft breathing until Hinata’s stomach growled.

Komaeda blinked twice while Hinata’s face turned red from the embarrassment. He then chuckled softly before saying, “Let’s go wash up, Hinata-kun. We should get ready for Hanamura-kun's dinner party.” Hinata bashfully nodded as Komaeda pulled himself up, but not before Hinata grabbed his face and pulled him in for a kiss.

* * *

The whole dining saloon was filled with the aroma of delicious food and drinks, tables filled with various delicacies. More so, everyone from the first class was welcomed.

Aside from receiving a light scolding from his mother for disappearing for a long time, Hinata rather enjoyed this time around with Komaeda’s company. It made his heart flutter constantly, sharing smiles from time and time among the crowd. It also didn’t help that Komaeda was being such a tease, subtly touching his groin without the others noticing as he passed by him. Hinata pursed his lips, giving a retaliation glare to the nonchalant Komaeda. Even Komaeda went as far as to whisper suggestive things in Hinata’s ear, making his face turn beet red.

Hinata’s mother somehow started to worry. She didn’t like the idea of Hinata spending too much time with Komaeda, even if he was an elite. She would motion for him to spend time with the others but Hinata found himself going back to Komaeda’s side.

Among the crowd, Hinata’s eyes widened when he spotted that same white-haired man who he bumped into that morning. Just as their eyes made contact, Hinata grabbed hold of Komaeda’s hand and led him away to a nearby quiet room, away from the hustle and bustle of the people, away from his parents, from everyone.

Hinata pressed Komaeda up against the oak wooden wall and kissed his slightly chapped lips, nibbling to moisten them as his hands roamed over his body. He simply could not have enough of him.

Komaeda moaned into Hinata’s mouth just to arouse him, suggestively so, as he teasingly brushed a finger over his clothed groin.

 _Good lord_ , Hinata wanted to have payback for Komaeda’s not-so-subtle teasing.

Hinata grabbed hold of his supple ass and Komaeda gasped between their mouths. It was payback time. Hinata drowned into Komaeda’s mouth while he fondled his plump cheeks, drawing soft moans from his lips while he pressed his body on his, pinning him further against the wall. Hinata then traced his hand behind and pressed hard with his fingers against where his entrance should be under his pants. Komaeda yelped helplessly, entrapped between the wall and Hinata’s body with nowhere to go as Hinata stroked his fingers vigorously, the fabric adding a rough friction against his throbbing hole.

Komaeda grabbed onto him, wrapping his arms around Hinata’s shoulder, clutching at his hair as he breathed hotly against Hinata’s mouth.

Hinata peered with sharp, lustful eyes, wanting to watch Komaeda come undone with just his fingers. Like a switch, his circular rubbing made Komaeda’s whole body tense, trembling and quivering lewdly against him.

But it was also affecting Hinata just as much. Just then, Komaeda moved his hips against him, drawing a sharp gasp from Hinata’s throat. Komaeda subtly smiled and it didn’t go unnoticed. Komaeda was _still_ controlling the situation and was not succumbing to his little revenge.

It didn’t matter anymore. Hinata dived wholeheartedly into that sinful mouth while grinding their sheathed hardening cocks together. Komaeda cried heatedly into his mouth as his hole received more abuse from Hinata’s relentless fingers.

Someone leaned against the door and subtly heard muffled voices. ‘How dare they leave the party so soon. What are they doing in there anyway?”

Someone had seen the pair walk into the room and followed them. Walking discreetly into the room and closing the door behind him, Hanamura heard indiscreet moaning as his eyes started to adjust to the figures before him.

His jaw dropped as his eyes laid upon the pair rutting against each other. Komaeda threw his head against the oak wall and sinfully moaned Hinata’s name in a heated, throaty grunt.

Hanamura ’s facial expression was a blend of dread and confusion as his thoughts slipped into his voice.

“W-what in the heavens is going on?!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you enjoy it?  
> What's your favorite part?
> 
> Give me your most detailed feedback. I'd really appreciate it.
> 
> -  
> Check Tumblr under the tags "my edit" or "my fic" to see my Komahina edits, and my Youtube for Komahina AMVs.  
> Tumblr: http://moonlessnight126.tumblr.com/  
> Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/moonlessnight126


	7. One Choice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long hiatus. Hope you enjoy the update!

**One Choice**

_Hanamura heard indiscreet moaning as his eyes started to adjust to the figures before him. His jaw dropped as his eyes lied upon on the pair rutting against each other. Komaeda threw his head against the oak wall and sinfully moaned Hinata’s name in a heated, throaty grunt._

_Hanamura’s facial expression was a blend of dread and confusion as his thoughts slipped into his voice._

_“W-what in the heavens is going on?!!”_

* * *

 Hinata immediately snatched himself away from Komaeda, his face pale and eyes stretched in horror. Komaeda opened his eyes at the loss of Hinata’s warmth and looked over to Hanamura who was gawking at them.

A bead of sweat trickled down Hinata’s forehead as he took one step closer to the horrified short man.

“H-Hanamura!”

When Hanamura looked at him with dread and confusion, Hinata panicked, “I can explain. W-We... It's not what you think-...”

When Hanamura took few steps back, Hinata stretched his hand out, horrified that he'd turn and run away. “W-wait…”

“It’s… It’s…” Hanamura’s lips trembled.

A look of panic showed on Hinata’s face. He knew the accusations would be thrown harshly his way so he quickly shut his eyes and braced himself as he expected him to say,  _‘It's disgusting, scornful, horrific, revolting. It’s...!!’_

“... Delicious!!!” Hanamura blurted out.

Hinata’s eyes sprung open in utter shock. He blinked twice before looking at the short man dumbfounded.

“.... what?”

“The… the transgression of the heavens, the sinful indulgence, the forbidden fruit, all cooked up deliciously to this sweet, glorious delicacy. What inspiration!!” Hanamura exclaimed.

Baffled by the sudden outburst, Hinata took a step back before his brow furrowed in sheer confusion.

“To stumble upon such a scene, what...what a fateful coincidence!”

When Hanamura’s lips twitched up to what seemed like a horny smile with a trickle of blood tracing down from his nose, Hinata felt stumped. He honestly didn’t know what to make of the short man’s reaction. It was something he didn’t expect at all.

“Uhm..., Hanamura, c-can… can you not- t-te...?”

“-tell anyone of this appetizing discovery!? My goodness gracious, I can’t believe it. T-Two men...” The short man’s legs trembled as he bent down, trying to cover his groin with his suit jacket. He tried to sustain a composed smile as drool dripped down his lips.

Hinata then cringed with unease at the way Hanamura was looking at them.

Suddenly, a knock on the door was heard.

“Hey, Hanamura, you in here?”

Souda opened the door and walked into the room. He blinked his eyes at the pale reactions of Hinata and Hanamura while his eyes squinted at Komaeda who gave him that usual annoying, carefree smile of his.

“What are you guys doing here?” Souda asked curiously as he looked at the pair with suspicion before his eyes peered down next to him at Hanamura and asked, “And why are you crouched down like that? Don’t you have a party to supervise?”

“Y-yes b-but…”

Souda grabbed and dragged him outside while Hanamura stretched his hand towards the pair with a sorrowful face. Souda stopped for a second and looked back at them and asked, “You two coming?”

It took a moment for Hinata to register while Komaeda answered in his stead, “We’ll be right behind you.”

After the two left them, Komaeda turned to Hinata who still had a hard time digesting what had just happened.

Hinata felt fear and dread fill his heart and it probably showed on his face because Komaeda looked at him with concern.

“Hinata-kun? Are you okay?”

Hinata looked at Komaeda for a lingering second before his throat barely sustained his voice to say, “Let’s go.”

Following Hinata outside, Komaeda once again called out for him, placing his hand on his shoulder.

Immediately, Hinata tensed and snatched his shoulder away, surprising Komaeda and even himself. He realized what he did and thus quickly apologized and excused himself saying, “Sorry, Komaeda. I just need… to be alone for a while.”

Without looking back, Hinata walked away, leaving Komaeda alone.

Komaeda quietly lowered his hand as he watched the distance stretch between them. With every step that Hinata took, his chest grew hollow as despair took hold of his heart. Feeling dejected, his eyes fell behind his bangs as this painful emotion took over him.

Mikan, who stood few steps behind, felt the tension between the two and her eyes filled with concern over Komaeda. She couldn’t see his face clearly but the way he stood still with his downcast gaze, as if he was crestfallen, made her heart clench painfully for him. She wanted to reach out to him but hesitated to approach him, thinking she might be unwelcomed.

Koizumi was passing by taking pictures when she saw Mikan reluctantly standing a few feet behind Komaeda. She smiled when she saw the blush on her face and thought of encouraging her to talk to him. Trotting close, she whispered close to her ear, “This is your chance. Go and talk to him.”

Mikan gasped as she turned in panic towards the source of the voice and saw Koizumi smiling at her. “I-I don’t… U-uhm, I…” She stuttered furiously before Koizumi asked curiously “Don't you want to talk to him?”

Mikan was surprised at first before she blushed and lowered her eyes. “U-uhm…Uhh...”

“You like him, right?”

Mikan's eyes widened and she could feel her cheeks burning from the neck up before stuttering defensively.

Koizumi giggled before cheering her on, “No need to be shy about it. Come on, go.”

Mikan gave her one last look with tears glistening the corner of her eyes before reluctantly approaching him with a soft, shy voice, “K-Komaeda-kun.”

Komaeda took a moment to register before turning his gaze down towards her. She couldn’t meet his gaze at first but when she did, her breath stopped in her lungs as nervousness took over. He slowly blinked his eyes once before he gave her a small, courteous smile.

Upon seeing that smile, Mikan's cheeks grew warmer and her eyes softened as she smiled back at him.

Koizumi, who cheered her from the side, smiled, thinking how cute they looked before taking a picture of them together.

* * *

 Leaning back against the wooden wall, Hinata couldn’t stop that feeling of dread swallowing up his heart. When the waiter saw the distress on his face, he offered him a glass. “Tough day, sir?”

Hinata hesitantly reached for it and quietly thanked him. The waiter gave a courteous nod and then went on his way.

Hinata thoughts ranged from fear of exposure to the abandonment of his parents to losing Komaeda. He quivered as the glass shook between his fingers but was quickly pulled back from his thoughts when someone called out to him.

“Yo!”

Hinata jerked his eyes down with dread at the sight of Hanamura as he felt his chest throb painfully.

Hanamura chuckled as he tried to soothe him, “Relax, relax, I’m not here to cause trouble. Just... enjoy the party! I worked really hard on it you know.”

When Hinata remained silent and wary, Hanamura sighed before reassuringly saying, “You don’t need to worry about earlier. Your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell anyone.”

When Hinata didn’t say anything, Hanamura added, “I cross my heart.”

“...How can I be sure whether to trust your word or not?”

“Obviously because I’d never want to come between you two.”

“...Why?”

“Eh?”

“...Aren’t you appalled by it?” Hinata asked as he took a sip to calm his nerves.

Hanamura dragged out the word “No” before tipping closer, whispering cautiously, “He's your lover, isn’t he?”

Hinata toppled over, choking on his drink before going through a coughing fit.

Hanamura had to laugh as he exclaimed excitedly, “There, there, no need to be embarrassed!”

Hinata couldn’t help it as he looked at the shorter man with his face beet red from either the embarrassment or the coughing or maybe even both.

Hanamura looked around before he admittedly said behind his hand in a quiet whisper, “You know, I’ve had thoughts about this before;  _two men_  together...but never in my wildest dreams did I imagine to witness such a sight!”

“That doesn’t… bother you?”

“Why would it? I don’t mind men. My tastes are pretty open, you know!”

Suddenly, a horny expression took form on his face. “In fact, I admire your conviction; this illicit affair with a man; the very definition of a societal condemnation, all for a taste of that lustful rendezvous!” Hanamura might have drooled a bit at that last notion.

Hearing that from someone else didn’t sit well with him. In an instant, feelings of guilt and shame made his stomach churn and the emotions quickly got built up in his throat when he thought of his parents.

“...It’s nothing to feel impressed abo-.”

Hinata was cut off abruptly when Akane called out to Hanamura. “Hey, Hanamura. Come over here! Was that all of the meat you’ve cooked?”

“Oh, that’s my cue! Good luck there, buddy.”

Hanamura left, leaving Hinata in a worse state than he was a few minutes earlier.

Slowly, he thought of Komaeda and that pang of guilt grew thicker in his throat. He felt a sting inside his chest like threads wrapping themselves painfully around his heart.

He turned his gaze towards Komaeda, and when he saw him with Mikan, his chest felt even tighter. Mixed feelings of jealousy and guilt heightened. He lowered his gaze from them as his thoughts shadowed his vision.

_Was he feeling guilty for giving into his feelings? Was he condemning both of them? Was it better for them to not give into their indulgence?_

Suddenly, something flashed in his face. Hinata blinked before Koizumi lowered her camera and asked, “Why the long face?”

Hinata gripped his drink a little tighter, snatching his eyes away as he said, “I’m fine.”

“That’s a lie right there. Your face says it all, you know.” When Hinata didn’t say anything, her tone softened as she gently asked, “So..., what’s bothering you?”

Hinata could feel his heart pounding and his nervousness showed in his voice as he tried to hide his anxiety, “I said it was nothing. Just… a lot on my mind at the moment.” He nervously avoided her gaze, squinting his eyes wearily as Koizumi peered at him so intently.

When he didn’t elaborate further, Koizumi leaned back on the wall next to him as she guessed curiously, “Are your parents being hard on you?”

Surprised, Hinata’s turned his head in shock towards her.

Koizumi gave him a courteous smile before she looked down at her camera. “I overheard our parents talking about marriage and such. I suppose that’s the case with many of us. Marrying to a wealthy family and having kids. I guess boys are pressured into that too.”

“Koizumi…”

She caressed her thumb over the camera with sentiment and lowered her voice saying, “But what if that’s not the kind of life we want? What if, for instance, you just want to a photographer, travel the world and simply take pictures without being pressured into marriage?” There was a silent moment before she finally said, “I guess it makes you want to rebel, huh?”

Hinata then wondered for a moment if his affections towards Komaeda stemmed as a sort of rebellion towards his parents.

_No..._

Komaeda’s charisma, his whole prospect of life, hope and freedom evoked something inside of him.

Hinata wondered why he was being so hard on himself. Why does he feel so much guilt? Even if he did follow his parent's wishes, living the life his parents wanted, would it even make him happy? Would he be happy to turn against the world and be by Komaeda's side? Pondering more into it, maybe there is no right or wrong answer for either path and it was all a matter of  _choice_  and taking responsibility for it. The decision weighed heavy on him because either one carries several consequences.

Even if choose either, he still couldn’t help but think that there would come a day where he would look back and wonder what could have been. He loves his parents but his heart throbs for Komaeda and the idea of losing him hurt. But--

“You’re in love with someone, aren’t you?”

Hinata gave a sharp gasp, his face paled as he stared wide-eyed towards her as she shrewdly looked back at him.

“I can see it in your eyes.” She then added jokingly, “better not be me!”

Hinata blushed at his flustered reaction as he pulled his face the other way to hide his embarrassment.

Koizumi giggled before her voice softened, “I think what I’m trying to say is do what makes you happy. Don’t let anyone stand in the way of your future dreams. Don’t let anyone decide for you. Make your own choices and fight for them. That way, you won’t have any regrets.”

When Hinata just stared at her with his eyes wide open in perspective, she gave a small laugh and apologized. “Sorry, I guess I got carried away and talked too much.”

Hinata took a moment before he smiled warmly, “No, not at all. Thank you, Koizumi, for sharing your thoughts with me. It gave me a lot to think about.”

Just then, Koizumi captured that smile with her camera. Hinata blinked once again to the flash before Koizumi took the glass from his hand, gave him a cheeky grin and exclaimed, “Glad to help!” She then left to join the others.

Well, he shouldn’t be drinking anyway. He smiled when her words echoed soundly in his head.

_That way, you won’t have any regrets._

After the conversation, Hinata felt a little at ease. Like he understood a little more about himself. Lifting his head up with a smile, he coincidentally caught sight of Nanami standing by herself from across the room.

When she lifted her gaze, their eyes met and lingered on each other for a moment before she smiled warmly, making Hinata slightly blush before she approached him. “Good evening, Hinata-kun.”

“Good evening, Nanami. Why were you standing by yourself?

“I’m always by myself, playing games or inventing ones.”

“Inventing?”

Nanami smiled as she explained further. During their time, many inventions were made. For the first time, humans could soar up in the sky with machines called aircrafts and with further developments with cars and gadgets, one could hope to dream. One day, she too wanted to expand the gaming arena with the forthcoming technology.

Hinata was so impressed that he felt taken aback for some reason. Compared to Nanami with her huge aspirations and big dreams, he felt a bit lacking. He wanted to be just like her and Koizumi who are yearning for more in life. But maybe, they were able to dream big because they were true elites, unlike him.

Nanami then tilted her head and asked, “Want to play a game with me?”

Hinata reluctantly replied with, “Sorry, Nanami. Maybe I’m not in the right mood for-...ah!” He was surprised when she pulled his hand, making him fluster at the soft touch.

Hinata then sighed. There was no other option but to simply consent to her will with no complaints. She was also very determined. He smiled as he agreed to play and felt the anxiety gradually wash away as they shared moments of laughter together. He felt thankful for Nanami for pulling him out of his worries, even if for just a brief moment.

* * *

 

 Amidst the conversation, Komaeda found himself drawn to their laughter and stared at them from afar with a solemn demeanor, his eyes expressionless and vacant. Mikan’s eyes softened at the hollow look of his eyes before she unconsciously placed her hand on his cheek and pulled him gently towards her.

Komaeda’s eyes grew slightly confounded when his gaze was pulled away and instead was met with her warm, doting eyes. He blinked once and stared into her eyes before Mikan pulled her hand back in belated realization as her face flushed a deeper shade of red. “I-I’m sorry! I acted w-without thinking.”

“...Tsumiki-san?”

She turned her bashful gaze away and said in a soft and quiet voice, “... Y-You looked disheartened somehow and I-I...” Her blush deepened as she tried to find the words.

Komaeda took a moment before he reached out his hand.

She gasped softly when he gently took her mid-air poised hand in his. She then gazed up into his eyes and saw the most genuine smile Komaeda has ever given her before he said, “I apologize for troubling you. You needn’t worry about trash like me.”

Mikan's hand quivered in his as she shyly blurted out, “N-No! Y-You’re n-not! T-That’s n-not...! I’m s-so sorry.”

Komaeda simply chuckled at her embarrassed, crying demeanor. It was strange to have Mikan fluster apologetically about everything, but that was part of her charm nonetheless, Komaeda thought as he wiped a tear away while concealing the desolate emotions residing in his heart.

As if sensing his loneliness, Mikan shyly squeezed his hand back as she tried to smile through the embarrassed tears.

* * *

As Hinata’s parents sat in the lounge, the mother exclaimed as she sipped on her coffee, “Hajime should be finishing the party soon. Oh, I’m so glad he got invited despite not being a true member of the elites.”

The father agreed with a nod before chuckling softly as he flipped a page of his newspaper, “When he comes, don’t pester him with questions about the party immediately. He gets squirmy whenever you do that.”

“But darling, it’s important to know how he’s progressing with the others.”

“Indeed. Just go easy on him.”

Just then the mother noticed the captain of the ship has seated himself with someone else in the table behind them. As the father read the newspaper, the mother overheard the conversation between them.

“So, you’ve not yet lit the last four boilers?”

“No, I don’t see the need to. We are making excellent time,” the captain responded.

“The press knows the size of the ship. Now, I want them to marvel at her speed. We must give them something new to print! This maiden voyage must make headlines!”

“I would prefer not to push the engines until they’ve been properly run in, especially with warnings of icebergs along the way.”

“Of course. I leave it to your good officers to decide what’s best. But wouldn’t it be glorious to hit the speed record for crossing the ocean and arrive earlier than expected and surprise them all? Make the morning papers.”

“I’ll do what I can,” the captain responded with a soft chuckle.

‘Icebergs?’ The mother thought before she settled her tea down on the table and looked out the small rounded window to the cold, dark night.

* * *

The party was coming to an end and Hanamura was giving a small speech, thanking everyone for coming to his party. 

The long night might have weighed Komaeda down, so he turned to Mikan and said apologetically, “I’m sorry, Tsumiki-san. I’m feeling a bit tired so I’ll be heading to my room now.”

She asked softly, worried for his well-being, “Are you okay?”

He smiled at her reassuringly and said, “I will be when I lie down a bit.”

When she nodded in understanding, he smiled and said, “Thank you for the lovely evening.”

She returned the smile before shyly tucking her hair behind her ear, “I-It’s nothing.”

After that, they exchanged goodnights before he left the room.

“Goodnight everyone and I hope you all had a pleasant time!” Hanamura exclaimed finally.

Souda exclaimed out loud, "I'm surprised you managed to give that speech without saying anything perverted for a change," making everyone in the room laugh.

With everyone clapping, Hinata turned to Nanami and said, “Thank you for this lovely evening, Nanami. I hope we can play again sometime.”

The words brought a genuine smile on her face before she said, “Me too. Goodnight, Hinata-kun.”

“Goodnight, Nanami.”

Hinata didn’t realize how much time had passed with Nanami, almost forgetting about his previous worries.

_His… worries?_

As waiters took haste in cleaning the tables, the elites were leaving the room one after the other. Immediately, his eyes searched the room for Komaeda but he was nowhere to be seen. ‘Did he leave already?’

Concerned, he left the room but still couldn’t find him around.

‘Did he go back to his room?’

Recalling what had happened between them, for some reason, Hinata started to feel a weighing feeling looming over his heart when belated realization washed over him. The way Hinata reacted, brushing him off like that... could he have possibly and unintentionally hurt Komaeda?

Realizing what he had done, his legs moved before he could register as he rushed towards Komaeda’s room, feeling an immediate urge to see him and make it right.

* * *

Back in the suite, Komaeda barely leaned on the wall, holding his mouth, as he coughed nonstop while trying to reach for his medicine. Hastily taking his pills, he plopped down on the bed and clutched his shirt while he tried regulating his breathing. Beads of soft sweat appeared on his forehead as he inhaled and exhaled, slowly feeling his heartburn ease.

Even when the pain was gone, Komaeda sensed a strange grip on his chest and that ache heightened when he thought of Hinata.

Although he truly believed it in his heart that Hinata deserved better,  _deserved another_ , somehow the thought of having Hinata with someone else filled him with this ache in his chest.

After Hanamura caught them, Hinata wouldn’t even look at him. He didn’t even want to be around him. Although that should be expected, he couldn’t help but feel abandoned.

For a moment, Komaeda felt himself drown in thoughts of despair as loneliness loomed over him.

Suddenly, he heard an urgent knock on the door, pulling him back from his agonizing thoughts. He picked himself up and opened the door, and there stood Hinata; breathing hard as if he had been running. At first, Komaeda felt a bit ecstatic and shocked before looking reserved.

Few moments of silence dawned in between, waiting as Hinata tried to regain his breathing and seemingly wanted to say something.

* * *

The moment Komaeda opened the door, every word that Hinata was ready to pour out vanished as a feeling washed over him when he saw the look of hurt on Komaeda’s face.

He couldn’t draw out any words at first as he tried to regain his breathing.

“... Komaeda, about earlier…I...” Hinata started with breaths between the words, taking one hesitant step towards him. When Hinata couldn’t think of anything to say, he gazed down in shame, lips pinched together in guilt.

Komaeda remained seemingly emotionless for a few passing moments before he asked, “...Are you having second thoughts, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata’s eyes shot open and shook violently before he drew out a breathless, “What?”

Komaeda’s eyes were solemn and void as he awaited Hinata’s response. When he saw the look of horror on Hinata’s face from the question, Komaeda lowered his head and asked in a pensive whisper, “Do you find me appalling?”

Hinata’s eyes widened further when he saw the look in Komaeda’s eyes, drowning in self-hate, a look that gripped painfully at Hinata’s heart. He unconsciously reached out to him and hastily pulled him down to his lips. He could feel Komaeda’s surprise because of the soft gasp that escaped before their lips slammed into one another.

As they kissed, Hinata wanted nothing more than to pull Komaeda away from such depressing thoughts.

As their lips slipped from each other, Hinata slowly pulled back and looked at him. Their lidded eyes gently glowed as they both blushed softly before Hinata pulled his eyes to the side and shyly requested, “May I come in?”

Komaeda took a moment before he opened the rest of the door for him.

The moment Hinata walked in, he sighed as he tried to explain himself, shamefully saying, “...I panicked when Hanamura caught us. I couldn’t… think straight. I was scared, Komaeda.”

Komaeda drew his lips into a thin line knowingly, lowering his head as the bangs covered his face and he spoke softly, “I understand, Hinata-kun, … if you decided you didn’t want me anymore.”

Hinata's heart ached at hearing Komaeda say that. He couldn’t even fathom the idea! He quickly placed his fingers on Komaeda's cheek and leaned close as his breathing shivered when he said, "How can I? I would never do such a thing to you."

He took a moment and spoke softly with emotion pouring into the words as he looked deep into his pale-green eyes, “I wasn't just scared because of that, Komaeda. I was scared because I thought I was going to lose you. I still am.  I would  _never_  leave you.”

Komaeda’s eyes slightly widened at the declaration before Hinata caressed his cheek and continued saying, “I’m worried about you, Komaeda... about us. No one would stand up for us if everybody learns about our relationship. Do you understand that?”

“Hinata... kun…”

Komaeda’s eyes shook as a blush settled on his pale cheeks and Hinata could tell that he felt touched at the words.

Hinata mirrored the blush as his gaze lingered a moment longer with his before he leaned closer. He gently nuzzled his nose with his in soft caresses, lips barely brushing over the other before he breathed the words, “We shouldn't be careless because I don’t want to lose what we have, Komaeda.”

Hinata could feel Komaeda shiver as their warm breaths caressed one another. He dragged his hand down Komaeda’s right arm and took his hand in his and squeezed.

“Let’s… just be careful from now on.”

They gazed at each other once again before Hinata found himself chuckling lightly before adding, “Although the days are proving how hard it is to control myself around you, Komaeda.”

Komaeda took a moment before he raised his left hand and gently cupped the side of Hinata’s face and pressed his lips softly to his. The moment Hinata felt Komaeda’s lips fully on him, his eyes shook before he closed them and exhaled warmly through his nose, instantly wrapping his arms around his waist.

Komaeda gently lifted his other hand and cradled Hinata’s face as a kiss after kiss followed before wrapping them lovingly around his neck.

The kisses started slow and sweet before they started breathing feverishly between kisses, before Hinata started returning them with fervor, with  _desperation_ , scared that this or any other intimate moment could be their last, that... in any given second Komaeda would be gone from his life.

That’s why, from that moment on, he vowed to treasure every waking moment with him because who knew what the future held for them.

Komaeda pulled inches back with a soft pop and said in a breathy voice, “Would you like to come to bed, Hinata-kun?”

He didn’t even need to ask.

He followed Komaeda to bed as they took off their clothes between feverish kisses, accidentally bumping into the nightstand, making one bottle of pills fall and spill on its surface as Komaeda fell on the soft sheets.

Komaeda gazed lovingly at Hinata as he took his shirt off before climbing into the bed.

* * *

After running in with Koizumi and her parents, Hinata’s mother exclaimed excitedly when her mother showed her pictures her daughter had taken of the party, “Your daughter is absolutely talented with pictures.” She was certainly pleased to find Hinata in one of the pictures with Nanami.

Koizumi’s father laughed saying, “She’s very enthusiastic about photography, and I believe she has a bright future in the realms of new and modern ways in the field, one that might add colors to photos someday.”

“That’s marvelous!”

“Oh, but we don’t advise her to get too consumed with it,” Koizumi’s mother added.

“Why not?”

Her mother then courteously smiled as she explained, “She wants to follow in my footsteps to become a great photographer but because of this passion of mine, I was away from home a lot of the time and it nearly ended my marriage. We believe instead it’s in her best interest to find a husband and settle down to marry.”

Koizumi cringed a little about that last bit.

Her father chuckled and said, “She’s been very stubborn about it though.”

“Oh, our son feels the same way but I'm sure one day he'll settle down with a beautiful young lady such as Koizumi one day.” Hinata's father said as he smiled while Koizumi frowned; recalling their earlier conversation. Seeing now the pressure Hinata was going through, she too felt sorry for him.

“Splendid!” Her father exclaimed excitedly.

“Where is he now?” Koizumi’s mother asked curiously.

Hinata's mother sighed and said, “Oh, I don’t know, I can never get hold of that boy. He was supposed to meet us right after the party.”

“Ah well, they say boys will always be boys.” Koizumi’s father said smiling.

* * *

‘I don’t deserve him.’ Komaeda thought repeatedly in his head as he lied back against the pillow, naked and bare as Hinata climbed over him.

Instantly, Komaeda's long arms wrapped around him, sliding one pale hand down that firm chest while the other gently curled at the back of Hinata's neck.

There was this warmth in the way Hinata looked at him, a look he couldn’t quite comprehend. He could see the emotions building up in Hinata’s eyes. He could feel his own emotions building up in his own heart. Those emotions were shown in the way Hinata touched his wretched body and caressed him with much adoration.

Just then, Hinata surprised him with a smooth dip and captured his mouth for a kiss, sending pleasurable shivers throughout his being as Hinata lowered his lips to his neck. Feeling his warm breath brushing against his skin between lush kisses, Komaeda moaned as those firm hands roamed over his scrawny body; the touch gentle and loving.

Komaeda couldn’t help but hate his body, yet, Hinata lovingly touched and kissed every part of him, making his chest throb and his cheeks burn with affection.

Hinata nipped at his neck, pulling a breathy moan from Komaeda’s lips while their bodies melted into one another, feeling each other’s growing arousal against their stomachs.  
  
Hinata then lifted his head up and found his lips once again and Komaeda readily opened his mouth, tongue eager to greet his.

Their languid tongues continued twirling together even when Hinata pressed his mouth down on his own and locked them together, muffling their moans as they exhaled softly from their noses.

Hinata gently sucked on his lips, pulling his lower lip in his mouth before lowering himself to his pale chest.

Komaeda braced himself with excitement when Hinata’s mouth hovered over his rosy nipple. He gave a soft gasp followed by a whimper when Hinata licked his perked bud and sucked on it gently.

Komaeda gave an eager moan and involuntarily arched against that warm mouth, feeling himself ooze a little. He felt Hinata smile while he licked the wet bud, twirling it around before devouring it once again in his mouth while his hand reached for the other and tweaked and rolled it between his fingers. 

The sensations Hinata made him feel were electrifying, making Komaeda clutch at Hinata’s hair strands and moan heatedly to his touches, “Nghh, ...mffhh, _A-Ah-! ..._ ”

Hinata pulled back with a soft pop and looked up. There was that look again; an emotion building up in those heavily-lidded eyes. Hinata then picked himself up and hovered his lips over his.

With their gazes locked, they looked deeply into each other’s eyes before Hinata gently moved his lower body against his.

Feeling Hinata’s girth rubbing against his made his stomach clench and sent a pleasurable rush through his veins. He couldn’t help but whimper against his lips, rubbing back, pulling a throaty groan from Hinata's throat.

They desperately but gently held one another, touching everywhere they can with their roaming hands while their mouths tried to devour each other in heated, lavish kisses.

“Komaeda...” Hinata groaned softly between their lapping mouths as he pressed his cock against him.

“Ah, .. _. N-nggh._.mnhf......Hinata- _kun_...” Komaeda’s voice shivered under the pleasure building up in his stomach. He glided his hand down Hinata's back and over his ass, pressing against one cheek. 

Hinata moaned deeply before grabbing Komaeda’s thin wrist and pinned it against the mattress while he continued frotting harder against him.

Komaeda arched his back against the sheets and moaned shamelessly. He whimpered with a shivered plea, begging Hinata to touch him and kiss him even more.

Hinata’s eyes slanted low and his hold loosened on his wrist as he slowly interlocked his hand with his before burying his face onto his collarbone, kissing his neck passionately while his free hand reached behind him and cupped his cheek, making Komaeda cry out.

"A-ah!! ...."

Komaeda breath shivered as he placed his hand on Hinata's cheek and begged, "I want you inside me, Hinata-kun."

Hinata's eyes widened and his cheeks burned before his eyes softened.

"Komaeda."

* * *

Hinata’s parents came back to the room and immediately the mother went towards Hinata's joint room and knocked on the door.

“Hajime?”

When there was no answer, the father said, “He’s probably sound asleep right about now.”

“Mhmm, but isn’t it odd he didn’t come meet us first, dear?”

“It is strange but he was probably too tired. Relax honey, in the morning you can ask him how the party went.”

Although he tried to soothe her, Hinata’s mother couldn't help but think, “Lately, I've been having this feeling that Hajime has been a little distant, don't you think?”

“It's nothing to worry about, honey. Perhaps, he's just in that phase where every young man goes through. He just wants a bit of privacy.”

“I hope you’re right dear. He’s been acting strangely since we boarded this ship. I hope he’s not hiding anything from us.”

“Have a little faith in our son. Come on, let’s get some shut-eye."

Although the mother looked concerned looking at the locked door, she dismissed her concerns and got herself ready for bed.

* * *

Clutching the sheets, Komaeda braced himself as his legs got pressed back and Hinata pushed himself in, eliciting a bit of a painful moan from Komaeda’s quivering lips. After the head popped in, Hinata continued to push until he was fully inside.

The feeling of having Hinata inside of him was indescribable. It felt truly amazing.

Both of their cheeks flushed hard for one another.

Hinata gently pushed back Komaeda’s hair out of his eyes and caressed his cheek, waiting for him to get used to his girth. When Komaeda’s breathing eased out, he nodded for him to continue.

Without breaking eye contact, Hinata started moving his lower body, slowly sinking in and out of him.

Komaeda grip on the sheets tightened as he felt Hinata move, stretching his tight walls and easing out again repeatedly.

“Mhnnn, ...nggghh... _haah_...!”

Komaeda’s heavy breathing melted along with the soft, slick sounds of Hinata’s gentle thrusting.

Slowly, their locked gaze blurred when Hinata dipped down, tilted his head and latched his lips on pale, smooth neck.

Komaeda moaned while his body rocked lightly to the gentle thrusting. As pleasure started to build up, he breathed with growing difficulty. The soft caresses of Hinata’s nose on his neck along with his warm breaths against his skin sent shivers down his body.

As pleasure continued to build up, Komaeda held onto him and moaned when every surge of pleasure coursed through him.

Although the thrusting was slow, the pleasure was building up at a steady pace until it got harder for Komaeda to breathe.

Komaeda clenched his stomach and curled his toes, wanting more, wanting Hinata to push deeper inside him. His voice shivered feverishly as he whispered Hinata’s name with need.

Hinata pulled his head back and placed his forehead on his. Their hot breaths melted into one another as he steadily held onto Komaeda's thighs and dragged his cock out, barely leaving in the tip. He looked right into Komaeda’s eyes as he pushed himself slowly and fully inside him.

Komaeda grip on the sheets tightened as Hinata once again dragged it nearly out before sinking fully back inside, keeping his soft gaze on him.

Hinata was taking it slow like he was savoring every moment.

Komaeda sultry moaned as he closed his eyes and drowned in the sensations before Hinata’s gentle voice called out to him.

“Look at me, Komaeda.”

Komaeda strained to open his eyes and stare into Hinata’s loving ones. Because of the way Hinata was looking at him while he listened to the soft, slick thrusts, Komaeda's embarrassment reached his ears and his heart was ready to burst.

With every long thrust, Komaeda’s was getting closer to the edge, drenching his stomach with his precum, barely holding his senses together. He wanted to cum, and more than anything he wanted Hinata to cum inside him. He placed his hand on the side of Hinata’s face and begged in a shaken husky voice, “Hinata-kun…cum inside me… p-please...”

Hinata's cheeks burned before he involuntarily jerked his hips, making Komaeda lose all air in his lungs before another long, sudden thrust followed.

Hinata’s slick thrusts picked up pace after he wrapped his arms around Komaeda in an endearing embrace, burying his face in his pale smooth neck. His hips jerked a bit harder with every thrust as he moaned Komaeda’s name against his smooth skin.

Listening to Komaeda’s sharp gasps and sensuous moaning, he groaned hotly against his ear, sending pleasurable shivers down Komaeda’s spine, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

The bed squeaked with every thrust as Hinata sank to the deepest core of him, staining him and sullying him from the inside with his succulent, juicy essence. His own cock twitched and oozed from the torturous friction between their sweaty bodies.

It felt...  _heavenly!_

If there was a God, Komaeda prayed that this moment would last a lifetime, with Hinata making love to him.

Komaeda rolled his eyes back as pleasure consumed him whole. His vision of the ceiling blurred and his throat tightened as he choked on the moans that were gushing out of his throat.  _Slap_  after  _slap_ , hard and wet, slick and loud, Komaeda felt his hole burn from the rigorous, wet friction.

His fingers dug into Hinata’s skin as the pleasure culminated in the pit of his stomach. His nerves heightened with spasming sensations, pushing him further into that feverish high, building up faster and faster, turning his body into convulsive fits.

He was getting closer and closer, and with every thrust, Komaeda thrashed his head to both sides as moans dripped from his agape mouth while he held Hinata for dear life. Legs trembling uncontrollably, his stomach clenched and unclenched as his lungs started hyperventilating. The heat threatening to melt him as sweat trickled down his forehead.

“Ah,  _nghh_ , Ahh! Hinata…kun, Hah, _aaah!!”_

Komaeda curled his toes as Hinata brushed over that sensitive spot inside him. The moment Komaeda cried out in pleasure, Hinata thrusted deep enough and into his sweet spot again and again.

“Does it feel good here, Komaeda?” Hinata panted between the words.

Komaeda simply moaned in response before their tongues found each other amidst the rigorous thrusting in loud, wet kisses.

The arrhythmic slaps were getting harder as Hinata pounded into him with exertion as he said while panting, “Komaeda, I c-can't,  _hah_ , hold it... any longer. I’m c-close."

The words made Komaeda tighten around Hinata as his cock convulsed, spurting against his stomach and chest with a loud, throaty cry.

The tightness made Hinata gasp as he clutched the sheets and buried himself in Komaeda's shoulder while he shot inside him; squirting as Komaeda's ass milked him till the last drop.

Hinata and Komaeda stayed still, basking in the high as it reverberated throughout their bodies. Feeling spent and tired, they weakly held each other as they tried to regain some of the air in their lungs.

Hinata was barely able to lift himself before he pulled back Komaeda's bangs from his sweaty forehead and cupped his flushed cheek. Hot and heavy came out their breaths as Hinata looked deep into Komaeda's heavy-lidded eyes.

Hinata then smiled a flashy smile through his flushed cheeks and said, “That was amazing, Komaeda!”

Komaeda gave a soft laugh to which Hinata mirrored before he pressed his lips to his, eliciting a soft moan from him when Hinata lovely pulled on his lips with tender kissing.

They shared kiss after kiss while warm breaths escaped their mouths in between until Hinata couldn't hold himself up any longer. He dropped next to Komaeda, tired and worn out.

They stared into each other's eyes for few passing seconds before Hinata pulled and held Komaeda closer as they lied in each other's arms.

They pleasantly talked for a while before Hinata whispered in a sleepy haze, “I might have to go back, but I don’t want to. I want to stay with you a bit longer.”

Komaeda smiled softly as he watched Hinata trying to resist before gently drifting off to sleep. He watched him sleep for a moment, admiring his sleeping face before he snuggled closer to his warmth.

‘I truly am lucky, Hinata-kun,’ Komaeda thought.

_… I don’t want to lose what we have, Komaeda._

Those words echoed soundly in his head and he felt this warmth spread through his chest.

For Hinata to care so much about him is just….

Komaeda truly felt happy.

That smile quickly dropped when he noticed the spilled pills on the nightstand behind Hinata. His eyes instantly filled with despair as he was reminded of everything. His lips drew into a thin line as he caressed Hinata's cheek. His eyes slanted in sadness as he silently thought, ‘Is it alright for me to have you, Hinata-kun?’

He could imagine the amount of despair he would go through if anything were to set them apart. Shouldn't that excite him as that would bring about the greatest hope?

What if Hinata was his greatest hope and that he finally found it?

Komaeda's eyes slanted further as his cheeks burned. He tipped his lips forward and gently kissed Hinata as he slept soundly. He then found himself smiling again when Hinata stirred and snuggled closer to him

‘Maybe I'll hold onto your hope for a while longer, Hinata-kun.’

His vision started to blur as his eyelids struggled to stay open before drifting off to sleep.

* * *

Knock, knock.

“Hajime, wake up. It’s time to go have breakfast, dear,” Hinata’s mother called out but there was no answer.

“Hajime?”

She tried opening the door but it was still locked. Feeling a bit perturbed, she tried knocking again.

“Oh, let him sleep, honey. He’ll wake up when he needs to be. He had a long night after all.”

“Oh, you're so easy on him!” His mother huffed angrily.

Hinata opened his eyes as the sun shined brightly through the small, round window.

“Good morning, Hinata-kun,” Komaeda said in his breathy morning voice.

Hinata sleepily smiled as he said in a groggy voice, “Mornin’, Komaeda.”

“Slept well?”

Hinata took a moment before saying as he looked around, “I'm not in my room, aren't I?” When he looked back at Komaeda, he gave a soft laugh as he said, “My mom is going to kill me.”

Komaeda smiled before Hinata pulled him closer and kissed him. Komaeda smiled through the kiss before they pulled back and smile as they looked each other.

Hinata's heart fluttered with joy and heart filled with warmth that he didn't have the care in the world as long as he was in Komaeda’s arms. He could stay in this moment forever, he thought.

* * *

Arriving at the table where his parents sat, Hinata greeted them cheerfully as he took a seat, “Hello, mother, father!”

“Good morning, son.”

“Hajime, where have you been since yesterday?” His mother exclaimed in a rather impatient tone, making Hinata jump a little.

“Honey, relax. Let him order tea first before jumping into questions,” his father soothed.

The mother sighed while Hinata awkwardly smiled.

“I apologize. Time passed by so quickly, I guess I forgot.”

The mother sighed as she spoke softly this time, “How was the party? Did you have fun?”

Hinata snorted as he said quietly, “I can’t even begin to describe it." He carefully picked his words next as he said, "It was a really long night. The food Hanamura cooked was great. Nothing like I’ve ever seen or tasted. Uhm, I think it went well. I... mostly spent the evening with Koizumi and Nanami.”

“Oh, we happened to talk to Koizumi’s parents after the party,” his mother interjected excitedly, “They too are searching for a suitable husband for Koizumi. She has a very bright future as a photographer and not to mention one of the elites. I think she’d make a lovely wife, son.”

“Nanami seems to be such a charming, young lady as well. She’s quite cute, don’t you think? I can see how close you two are becoming,” his father added.

Hinata hesitated to answer as all he could think about was Komaeda and the passionate night they had together, “U-Uhm…”

The father laughed as he said, “See? He’s already blushing, honey.”

Right then, Hinata saw Komaeda walk into the cafe and his face immediately lit up.

“Excuse me, mother, father.”

As Hinata left to sit with Komaeda, Hinata's mother took a moment before asking, “Dear, have you noticed Hajime has been spending an awful lot of time with his new friend?”

“That elite boy? I think it’s great to have one of the elites as one of his friends.”

“I’m glad he was able to befriend one but that’s not the reason we came for, dear. Hajime has always admired the class of the elites and he wished he can be just like them. The closest he can get is by marrying and we’ve done all we can to make it possible. Also, I’m a bit weary of Hajime’s new friend.”

“Why is that?”

“I’ve been hearing these rumors about him. He’s been in a series of accidents since his parents died and even a kidnapping, and that he isn’t mentally healthy; given all of the things he had to go through. I’m not sure if it’s okay for Hajime to spend too much time with him.”

“Okay dear, we’ll talk to him during lunch.”

* * *

As they passed time playing cards on deck, the boys soon found themselves immersed in deep conversation.

Hinata continued to be impressed by the knowledge Komaeda had about the world. He was very much allured by his charm, by his voice, by the simple mentioning of his own name coming out of those lips.

As perfect as he might be, Komaeda did border along disturbing topics from time to time and left him a bit nervous or unsettled every time, but it was all part of the allure that Komaeda carried.

He had never met anyone as complex and beautiful as him before, he thought.

Komaeda stopped midway and laughed awkwardly, "Sorry, I must be boring you, Hinata-kun."

"Not at all. I'm always interested in what you have to say, Komaeda.”

“You’re too kind, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata laughed through his nose as he said, “You say that a lot, don’t you?”

"That's because I understand better than anyone else that I'm ultimately worthless, Hinata-kun."

Hinata countered that statement with, "And you should understand by now that's not how I think about you."

After a moment, Komaeda smiled and said, "No, it’s not."

Hinata took a moment before admitting, "Although, there are some topics you talk about that are a bit frightening or unsettling at first."

Komaeda titled his head with that eerie smile of his and squinted his eyes cunningly as he said in that breathy voice, "Well, I wouldn't want to scare you away, Hinata-kun."

"You wouldn't scare me that easily, Komaeda."

Komaeda's smile widened and his eyes squinted a bit more.

Hinata looked over to the sea and thought quietly before he asked, "You carry a great deal about hope, don’t you?"

"That’s because hope is all I have, Hinata-kun. It’s what I live for."

Hinata’s eyes slanted in sadness as he said, "It just saddens me… the things you had to go through."

Komaeda smiled appreciatively as he said, "Trials are necessary to become strong, and the harsher the trial, the stronger you become, right?"

That made Hinata smile because he was going through a trial himself as well and he wanted to be up for the challenges ahead.

* * *

 During lunch, Hinata dined with his parents. The food was simply exquisite. Nothing less to expect from a grand ship like the one they were on.

The mother was the first to speak, “Hajime, dear, we need to talk.”

Hinata stopped mid-way eating as he looked at her, “What is it, mother?”

“It’s about your new friend.”

“Komaeda? W-what about him?”

“We believe it’s best if you spend less time with him, dear.”

Hinata’s brows furrowed as he looked at his father and asked, “What is this about, father?”

“Your mother believes he can be a bad influence on you, son. After the things we learned about him, we think it’s best if you avoid him altogether.”

“Why is that? I don’t understand,” Hinata said angrily.

“Hajime, dear, we want what’s best for you and we believe he’s not the right company for you.” Hinata's mother also further explained their reasoning.

“Do you even know what you’re saying? You’re telling me to abandon his company just because he fell into a series of misfortunes? Can you even imagine the things he had to go through? He lost both of his parents, mother. He has stage-3 lymphoma. He might be different from everyone else but I happen to enjoy his company!” Hinata defended infuriatingly.

When people looked their way because of Hinata's outburst, his father banged his hand on the table as he reprimanded sternly, "Hajime, watch your tone."

Hinata stood up rather shamefully as his eyes slanted in remorse, “F-Forgive me, mother, father. I didn’t mean to burst out like that. I’m very sorry.” Hinata felt ashamed for losing his temper and he also felt like he needed to apologize for hiding the truth from them because he could never face them with it.

Hinata's mother sighed before smiling, “Okay dear, as long as you know what you’re doing. We trust you.”

Hinata gripped his fists as his heart throbbed with guilt. He knew his parents continuously strive to do what was in his best interest and he could never blame them for that.

* * *

“Hinata-kun, are you okay?”

Komaeda might have noticed his anxiety and it was surely written all over his face. After his conversation with his parents, he couldn't help but feel he had betrayed their trust.

“It’s nothing, really. It’s just… I’ve been feeling a bit stressed because of my parents. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

As they walked along on deck, Hinata remained silent as he immersed himself in thought while Komaeda strolled beside him before he turned to him, “Ne, Hinata-kun. Would you like to attend a festival?”

Hinata stopped and looked at him in question as he repeated, “Festival?”

Komaeda nodded as he explained, “The lower class are having a festival on the lower deck this afternoon. I thought attending such an event could lighten you up, Hinata-kun.”

 _That actually sounds interesting,_  Hinata thought.

“Will that be okay? Considering our attire, we would surely stand out.”

Komaeda chuckled through his nose as he said, “Wear something simple then. Just a plain shirt at most. We can forget ourselves for one afternoon and let loose of all our troubles.”

Hinata stared at him for a moment before he smiled. “I’d love that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What are your thoughts? Tell me in detail!


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